Spiral of Madness

Gripping my sheets tight,
Another horrific night,
Toss and turn, I fucking fight
This bullshit in my head
Will keep me up tonight.

Fuck!
My hands are trembling
The anger is resetting
These thoughts in my head...
Becoming unsettling.

NOW
I just want to wrap my fingers around
Your fucking neck!
Never to think of what comes next
Lost in the moment of hellish context
My blood is boiling..
I dont understand!

Smash fucking everything!
Drink fucking everything!
Smoke fucking everything!
Yet I still can't feel a thing..
Only negativity
A fucking deadbeat
Hanging by a string..
Ill kick the the chair from under me..
Let me fucking swing.

My hands are covered..
My mind is smothered
A bloody mess
I become just another
Cliche-ridden stress..

Fuck my mind! I don't belong!
Fuck your society! It's fucking wrong!
A double edged sword of plastic rules
A fucking disaster you call "essential tools"

And people ask..
Why I'm so mad..
Im losing rational insight
To a society, fucking blind!
I AM fighting on the inside
To abstain, from raping your minds
Fucking cowards.

I will be the first to say
I am a fucking deadbeat today
Just because your 401 K
You think your fucking better than me!?

Why should I explain myself to those who never listened
Fuck you, you were never there when I needed you!
I am left with the void of rage, hate, it's still,
Locked inside my gut, I think its going to spill..
Overflow to satisfy my need to kill
YOU DONT FUCKING LISTEN ANYWAY
NO ONE FUCKING LISTENS TO WHAT I SAY
SO I NEED A BETTER REASON NOT TO TAKE MY LIFE TODAY.

FUCK!

I'M SO SICK OF THIS SHIT!!!!!!!

TELL ME THAT IT'S ALL MY FAULT
I ALWAYS LOVE A BROKEN RECORD
GIVE ME A REASON TO NOT SLEEP TONIGHT
I. FUCKING. HATE. THIS. LIFE.