Help
Im on my way to a better place
Swallow reality with a grim face
Im beginning to feel out of place
All to stumble at my own pace..
And Im so fucking tired...
Fuck you, and your words
Thinking youre special because you have the works
Putting me down when you know that it hurts
Whenever I speak out you flaunt yourself..
Always have to contest on who has it worse..
Beneath that shroud Im crying for help..
All you care about is making your point..
You are always right..right?
You say Im dramatic..
I say Im ready..
You say that I am erratic
You say I dont know how good I have it..
Yet Im so tired of this...
All I can say is..
I accidentally killed myself trying to forget what you set in motion..
Its okay though..
Youre always right..right?
______
I always looked up to you for as long as I can remember..
I wanted to be you..
Someone who is strong, doesnt need to rely on others..
Someone who is genuine and is able to love another..
Someone who is something worthy of being loved..
And then I remember the first time I let you down
Your eyes were intense and you adopted a frown..
Little did I know it was only the beginning ...
And im already so tired..
Everytime I became upset you had to make sure
That everyone knew you could do it better..
Always taking her attention off of me.
Always gotta be the bad guy..
But shit..when were you ever,
Scared of getting your fucking hands dirty..?
I already know the answer..
After all you werent afraid to let that man have his way with me...
Were you..
______
Everyone around me says I could be a great person
If I put my mind to and and worked hard..
Only my mind is stuck in a gutter..
A grimy trench of sickness and cold..
Right above my heart which is buried in Old.
Im so tired..
I find myself riding around with my friends..
Counting all our money, wind in our faces..
Im only 24 and I have so much to experience
Yet I find myself alone even in crowded places...
No words can console what isnt whole..
No mending can fix what is fucking broke.
I find myself at a loss for words
As they stare at me..hoping its a joke
I told him one day these pills would fucking kill me.
He laughs
4 hours later Im being revived.. Fighting for dear life.
I cant forget my own fucking face..
I cant let go of that horrible place..
I cant stop crying, please give me peace..
Im so tired...
In short he had no idea..
My mask finally counterproductive.
He didnt beleive I suffered..
Because he couldnt see what is haunting me.
Its been a long day
Its been a bad day
Im exhausted..so tired..
A table full of liqour, drugs, and bad decisions
The darkness is pounding at the door
The voices of my torment whisper sweet nothings.
I dont want to know my fucking name..
I dont want to know my fucking face
I cant feel my heart please help..
I might be dying inside its just as well.
I cant feel my breathing
I cant see a light..
I cant go on beleiving..
Things will be alright..
You'll ask me if im fine
Ask me if im fucking FINE.
I answer the door..
The voices await..
Im just so tired..
Raising their voices. They scream into my head..
YOU CANT SLEEP WHEN YOUR FUCKING DEAD
Swallow reality with a grim face
Im beginning to feel out of place
All to stumble at my own pace..
And Im so fucking tired...
Fuck you, and your words
Thinking youre special because you have the works
Putting me down when you know that it hurts
Whenever I speak out you flaunt yourself..
Always have to contest on who has it worse..
Beneath that shroud Im crying for help..
All you care about is making your point..
You are always right..right?
You say Im dramatic..
I say Im ready..
You say that I am erratic
You say I dont know how good I have it..
Yet Im so tired of this...
All I can say is..
I accidentally killed myself trying to forget what you set in motion..
Its okay though..
Youre always right..right?
______
I always looked up to you for as long as I can remember..
I wanted to be you..
Someone who is strong, doesnt need to rely on others..
Someone who is genuine and is able to love another..
Someone who is something worthy of being loved..
And then I remember the first time I let you down
Your eyes were intense and you adopted a frown..
Little did I know it was only the beginning ...
And im already so tired..
Everytime I became upset you had to make sure
That everyone knew you could do it better..
Always taking her attention off of me.
Always gotta be the bad guy..
But shit..when were you ever,
Scared of getting your fucking hands dirty..?
I already know the answer..
After all you werent afraid to let that man have his way with me...
Were you..
______
Everyone around me says I could be a great person
If I put my mind to and and worked hard..
Only my mind is stuck in a gutter..
A grimy trench of sickness and cold..
Right above my heart which is buried in Old.
Im so tired..
I find myself riding around with my friends..
Counting all our money, wind in our faces..
Im only 24 and I have so much to experience
Yet I find myself alone even in crowded places...
No words can console what isnt whole..
No mending can fix what is fucking broke.
I find myself at a loss for words
As they stare at me..hoping its a joke
I told him one day these pills would fucking kill me.
He laughs
4 hours later Im being revived.. Fighting for dear life.
I cant forget my own fucking face..
I cant let go of that horrible place..
I cant stop crying, please give me peace..
Im so tired...
In short he had no idea..
My mask finally counterproductive.
He didnt beleive I suffered..
Because he couldnt see what is haunting me.
Its been a long day
Its been a bad day
Im exhausted..so tired..
A table full of liqour, drugs, and bad decisions
The darkness is pounding at the door
The voices of my torment whisper sweet nothings.
I dont want to know my fucking name..
I dont want to know my fucking face
I cant feel my heart please help..
I might be dying inside its just as well.
I cant feel my breathing
I cant see a light..
I cant go on beleiving..
Things will be alright..
You'll ask me if im fine
Ask me if im fucking FINE.
I answer the door..
The voices await..
Im just so tired..
Raising their voices. They scream into my head..
YOU CANT SLEEP WHEN YOUR FUCKING DEAD