In My Heart

I think then i cry
Sometimes i don't know why
I tap and shake
Feels like my world will quake
I hate the way i look
I'm a lousy cook
I feel, i bleed
But you're the one i need
I sang stupid songs
And hoped we would get along
You ingnored me, i didn't exist
But still you were the one i missed
I say i hate you and i lie
I still dream of your turqoiz blue eyes
I frown and get depressed
You were better then the rest
You loved another girl
And she became your world
I admit i couldn't stand the sight
But i pretended i was alright
Fake smiles hid my tears
But you not liking me was what i feared
The stress i couldn't take
A decision i had to make
I hated myself so much
So i got a knife and started to cut
I felt better for a moment then so ashamed
Just for you i started to change
So i ate healthy, put you out of my mind
And found something worth my time
I lost wait and learned how to cook
But you still had my attention took
Slowly but surely i started to heal
But it still was hard to deal
I didn't cut but i had an erge
But i stood my ground and found my nerve
I still love him don't get me wrong
Because in my heart is where he belongs.