My little black rain cloud

What have I done?
Ruined what we had
Took away our fun
Honestly, I’m going mad.

I’ve never closed the door
It was always open for you
I’d be the welcome mat on the floor
This is what I do.

But since you never showed
The door never closed.
I’m still the welcome mat
I still want you back

The storm came months ago
And it hovers over my head
My back is freezing cold
I want to say the words I never said

You never wanted a river
So I made you a pool
With a little help from the weather
If you don’t like it, it’s cool.

I still wait for you
I’m not ditching the car
I’m not leaving you to
Walk so far

I’ll pace for miles and miles
Waiting for a change I can’t do by hand
Making different styles
Thinking of a plan

In any natural disaster I wait out side
With all these thoughts in my mind
Watching the clouds on my breath
Listening to the fading beating in my chest

I still keep my thoughts in my head
I really want it this could to stop hovering
I want to see the sun it’s covering
My hope mind as well be dead

I’m still searching for these words
So you should just forget about me
After all, it’s what I deserve
Don’t make it this easy

The rain should just drown me
Make me part of the wild sea
Where the sand is my only friend
Because with me you can’t depend

My little rain cloud can rain forever and ever
It can take the skin off my bones
Wash my heart away forever
But can leave my thoughts alone

The door is still open for you
And I’m still the welcome mat
Do what you do
I love you, that’s a fact.