I find it admirable that you used present tense and was able to stick to it. The suspense in this chapter is amazing, and I love the pacing. Good job! I'm excited to see what will happen next!
To those who have commented, I will hopefully be updating soon. Just have had a bit of school & writer's block in the way. Sorry for the delays. It'll be up & running soon!
This chapter is amazing! I love the description and the situation, it was so suspenseful! I was sitting at the edge of my seat (literally)! Keep writing, I'm looking forward to reading more of your story!!! =)
Thanks Gabby!! :) I just took what was a draft from my notebook & put it on here. Sadly, they don't have spell check. But I will change those and get right on it. I will write more and post it up here shortly.
I like the chapter. It's suspenseful and you wonder what the hell is going on. The present tense is unique, just make sure you keep it constant! I just found a few grammar mistakes.
You put 'un til', when 'until' is one word. You put 'in to' when 'into' is one word. You put 'no, I am going to slowly...' when the right 'to' to use would be too.
Other than that, it's pretty good. I'm looking forward to more. :)