Take a Breath - Comments

i almost cried lol

i almost cried lol

i love this series its good haha

Good update!
I really can't wait for more.
Update soon? :D <3

Haha! this is such a great/funny story! please write more before I die!

Na na na, you cant catch me! Haha that was very cute. I loved this update. So glad it was updated. :)

I like it!
The beginning was so funny haha.
This is so good so far!
I have to agree with dawn of light but other than that, update soon, love :D

I like the beginning! It was hilarious haha.

Just a few tips. Make sure you space out your dialogue like this:

"Bella?.. Bella!" Louis shouted.

"What!?" I shouted, tired.

"Get up!"

"No leave me alone," I hissed.

I pulled my blanket over my head. Just as I got comfortable again, my blanket started to move. I sat up to get a good grip on my blanket.

"You're not going to win this," Louis said.

"Bring it," I smirked.

Notice how I corrected some of your small errors. (: Also with the spacing. With that, I know you're on mobile so it's a bit hard to catch those minors. Just make sure you reread it and proofread. :)

Over all, I like the storyline it's heading to. And, thank you for the credit! I hope to see more! :D

Seems interesting, I like it so far! Keep going please? :)