Summer and Forever

The sky was dull and gray. My mother had gotten another boyfriend and all you could hear was their animal groans in the deep hours of the night. I pushed the pillow far over my head and willed myself not to hear them.

It didn't work.

Finally I couldn't take it anymore. I had to get out of the house.

The backdoor opened silently so my father wasn't disturbed. He was in rare sober mood where no girlfriend was distracting him. He was just glaring sullenly at the wall, contemplating the hell his life had become.

I tip toed past him and slipped outside, following the path to the place where all this had started.

The shed. Jordan's death.

The shed itself was not menacing. It stood, old and rotted, alone and abandoned because of the bad memories it harboured. I let my fingers gently touch the wood of the door and I pushed it open.

Everything seemed dark and empty inside. A musky smell hit me immediately as the door creaked open and I gagged. I crept in. I hadn't been in this place since it had happened.

Absent mindedly, I fingered a white strand of my hair and curled it around a finger. I felt the soft wood creak underneath my feet and shivered. I couldn't see much inside but I could make out one thing.

High above on one of the rafters was an old bit of rope still tied to the raft. It was cut, exactly the way it had been all those years ago, and had been left there.

I shook my head and gently started towards the rafter when the wind gently blew the door shut.

Instantly i was encased in darkness. The feeling of claustrophobia consumed me and I looked around wildly. Something flashed white in the darkness and I remembered the pale face of Jordan grotesquely twisted in a scream.

His tongue lolled from his mouth, purple and disfugred. I did the only thing a rational person could do.

I screamed.

***

I screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed. I screamed past the point where my voice gave out.

I was frozen to the spot, staring at the place where my brother had died and picturing his face in the dark. To no surprise of mine, nobody came to help me but still i screamed.

Stupidly, I remembered that whenever I had screamed or gotten in trouble, Kevin had always been there. He had held my hand, held me and rescued me.

The image of Jordan that i was so sure was real slowly faded into the blackness but still i screamed. I was terrified and alone again and this time...I couldn't handle it.

***

They found me the next morning. I was in a ball, pale as a sheet and shivering. Apparently I wasn't responsive for a few hours until they shoved a bit of rum down my throat and I coughed it back up.

My mother sat with me on the couch while my father spoke to the ambulance men and reassured them that I was fine. They left after dubious looks at me and my parents. I didn't care.

"Sweet heart, what were you doing down there?" My mother asked gently. It was the first gently tone i'd heard her use in almost a decade and I hesitated before answering.

"I just wanted to get out of the house." I replied honestly.

"Why?" My father demanded. "Are we not good enough for you? Are we not the perfect parents you pictured? Is that why you wanted to stay with your boyfriend rather then us? Oh wait! You're not with him! What did we tell you, young lady? You were always going to come crawling to us-"

"I LEFT HIM BECAUSE I COULDN'T HANDLE BEING ALONE, NOT BECUASE I WANTED TO COME BACK TO YOU!" I screamed, standing up. It was the first angry tone i'd used on my father and it made him shut up. "I LEFT HIM BECAUSE I WAS AFRAID OF FALLING IN LOVE! I LEFT HIM BECAUSE I WAS AFRAID OF WAITING FOR HIM AND ENDING UP LIKE YOU AND MUM; A BICKERING PAIR OF LONELY OLD WHORES!"

Tears streamed down my face as my fists curled and clenched. "I loved him Dad. I don't...I don't love you. I never came back here by choice."

***

The aftermath of that angry tirade was terrible. Neither of my parents said a word to me or each other. There was no bickering, no fucking and no drinking. It was just me and my parents locked in a house, silent and miserable.

The silence lasted for three days. My family was sitting in the loungeroom silently.

My mother was looking at the ground while my father was staring at his shoes as if they had the answer to all his problems.

I just stared at nothing in particular.

Then the doorbell rang. My mother glanced up dully. "That'll be the mail man." She whispered in monotone.

I stood up stiffly. "I'll answer it." Nobody answered me.

***

I pulled the door open carelessly, letting it swing back and crash into the wall. I knew I looked like hell.

My hair was all over the place and I was in my pajamas. I hadn't slept in days. The person standing on the porch looked a little familiar and a lot like a god. He stepped forwards, nervously wringing his fingers together.

"Sarai." He said quietly. I just stared at him, shell shocked. "S...I love you. I can't do this without you. I know you love me."

I opened my mouth to say something but he held up his hand.

"I came to this house to do one thing and one thing only okay? I'm nervous as hell because I've never done this before but I can't lose you and I...I want you." My brain wasn't comprehending.

What was Kevin doing on the front porch? I watched him suddenly bend over and I gasped, stumbling forwards to catch him. I frowned in confusion when he straightened up, now resting on one knee.

"Kev?" Slowly the wheels clicked into place, just in time for him to pull out a ring.

"It was my mothers. She gave it to me to give to you." He said quietly. I clutched my chest. He was...proposing.

"Sarai Cage...girl I met at summer camp...girl i've only been on one date with...girl who tied me to a bed when i was sick...girl who saved my brother's life...girl who I love so much its hard for me to believe...be mine this summer and forever...will you marry me?"