Status: Completed.
Demolition Lovers
One-Shot.
Hand in mine, into your icy blues
And then I'd say to you we could take to the highway
With this trunk of ammunition too
I'd end my days with you in a hail of bullets
"Frankie," I pleaded, "don't go. I need you baby." He turned towards me and made eye contact, but quickly looked away. "Gerard, I have to. I'm sorry. This... this just isn't right." His arm reached down for the bag that sat there. Tears were forming in my eyes now. "Things will get better, I promise." "You can't promise me things like that Gee..." he paused, "Gerard."
He hadn't called me Gee in days. Things had been awkward between us lately, for no known reason. I guess he just couldn't take it anymore. "Goodbye Gerard. Take care." And the door closed behind him. My whole heart sank to the ground, shattering into a million pieces.
I'm trying, I'm trying
To let you know just how much you mean to me
And after all the things we put each other through
A few months ago, I wrote him a song. It wasn't published yet, for fear of exposion to our relationship. We promised we'd be demolition lovers til the end. And I guess that's what this was, the end.
I'm trying, I'm trying
To let you know how much you mean
After he announced he'd be leaving, I sat on the couch all day and night. Only moved really early this morning, to go to the bathroom. I almost felt I didn't have enough strengh for that. I finally fell asleep at about 1:30 am. Only to wake, what seemed like seconds, later. Several bags were waiting by the door. My heart sank a bit, knowing he was serious.
Know how much I want to show you you're the only one
Like a bed of roses there's a dozen reasons in this gun
I collapsed behind the closed door. Tears stedily streaming now. My hands were shaking, it was getting hard to breath. My thoughts raced back. 'I'd end my days with you in a hail of bullets.' There was only one way to prove to him I couldn't live without him. There really were reasons in a gun. I picked myself up and went into the bedroom. It made my chest hurt even worse. His clothes all gone, pictures of us gone, his notebook he usually wrote down guitar riffs into though, still lay on the desk. I quickly opened it and scribbled down; 'Until this pool of blood baby. I mean this. Forever. I love you. You were the only one. I'll see you again, someday. XOXO Gerard.'
Until the end, until this pool of blood
Until this, I mean this, I mean this
Until the end of...
The gun was cold in my warm hands. It felt good to have it, a sense of power washed over me. I stood at the end of what used to be 'our' bed. I pulled out the only picture I had left of us together, it was in my wallet, crinkled up, but it was beautiful. His lip ring shined in the photograph. I let out a sigh. Raising the gun to my mouth, I felt like I knew things would be fine after I did this. My teeth lightly sat down on the barrel. The trigger ready to be pulled. I let out one last breath. Thinking about Frankie's beautiful face one last time in my mind before...
'BANG'
And in this pool of blood, and as we're falling down
I'll see your eyes, and in this pool of blood
I'll meet your eyes, I mean this forever
And then I'd say to you we could take to the highway
With this trunk of ammunition too
I'd end my days with you in a hail of bullets
"Frankie," I pleaded, "don't go. I need you baby." He turned towards me and made eye contact, but quickly looked away. "Gerard, I have to. I'm sorry. This... this just isn't right." His arm reached down for the bag that sat there. Tears were forming in my eyes now. "Things will get better, I promise." "You can't promise me things like that Gee..." he paused, "Gerard."
He hadn't called me Gee in days. Things had been awkward between us lately, for no known reason. I guess he just couldn't take it anymore. "Goodbye Gerard. Take care." And the door closed behind him. My whole heart sank to the ground, shattering into a million pieces.
I'm trying, I'm trying
To let you know just how much you mean to me
And after all the things we put each other through
A few months ago, I wrote him a song. It wasn't published yet, for fear of exposion to our relationship. We promised we'd be demolition lovers til the end. And I guess that's what this was, the end.
I'm trying, I'm trying
To let you know how much you mean
After he announced he'd be leaving, I sat on the couch all day and night. Only moved really early this morning, to go to the bathroom. I almost felt I didn't have enough strengh for that. I finally fell asleep at about 1:30 am. Only to wake, what seemed like seconds, later. Several bags were waiting by the door. My heart sank a bit, knowing he was serious.
Know how much I want to show you you're the only one
Like a bed of roses there's a dozen reasons in this gun
I collapsed behind the closed door. Tears stedily streaming now. My hands were shaking, it was getting hard to breath. My thoughts raced back. 'I'd end my days with you in a hail of bullets.' There was only one way to prove to him I couldn't live without him. There really were reasons in a gun. I picked myself up and went into the bedroom. It made my chest hurt even worse. His clothes all gone, pictures of us gone, his notebook he usually wrote down guitar riffs into though, still lay on the desk. I quickly opened it and scribbled down; 'Until this pool of blood baby. I mean this. Forever. I love you. You were the only one. I'll see you again, someday. XOXO Gerard.'
Until the end, until this pool of blood
Until this, I mean this, I mean this
Until the end of...
The gun was cold in my warm hands. It felt good to have it, a sense of power washed over me. I stood at the end of what used to be 'our' bed. I pulled out the only picture I had left of us together, it was in my wallet, crinkled up, but it was beautiful. His lip ring shined in the photograph. I let out a sigh. Raising the gun to my mouth, I felt like I knew things would be fine after I did this. My teeth lightly sat down on the barrel. The trigger ready to be pulled. I let out one last breath. Thinking about Frankie's beautiful face one last time in my mind before...
'BANG'
And in this pool of blood, and as we're falling down
I'll see your eyes, and in this pool of blood
I'll meet your eyes, I mean this forever
♠ ♠ ♠
This was a therapy one-shot for me. Written in 2008 or 2009.