Love's Requiem

I woke up the next morning, feeling someone lying next to me. Man, did this feel like déjà vu. I sat up and realized Alex and I were in the same bed, well that’s not a big deal I mean I’ve shared a couch with Jack numerous times and Niko was fine with that. It was the small detail that I realized him and I was naked and had all the evidence that we probably had slept together that sent me in to chaos.

“Get up!” I exclaimed smacking Alex across his back.

“What, what-Whoa what the fuck!” Alex exclaimed once it hit him as well. “Did you and I-“

“You fucking planned this so don’t fucking play stupid!” I told him.

“You think I planned to get you drunk and sleep with you, trust me I wouldn’t fucking do that to you.” He told me, “Not again at least.” He mumbled.

“How the fuck did this happen,” I groaned running my hand through my stringy hair.

“We’ll I’m pretty sure you either went on top of me or I went in between your-“

“Now’s not a time for sarcastic remarks.” I told him smacking him again. “Fuck,” I sighed as I looked down at my engagement ring as I felt tears run down my cheeks.

“Look, for what it’s worth I’m honestly sorry.” He told me sincerely.

“I should go shower,” I mumbled getting up with the sheet and going in to the bathroom.

What was I going to tell Niko? Should I tell Niko? Who am I kidding, how could I not tell him? I tried to push all the thoughts out of my head, and focus on what had to be done today. After I showered and got dressed, I headed downstairs to get coffee and make sure the bus was going to be on time to pick us up.

“Bella we can’t act like last night didn’t happen.” Alex told me walking up to me later that morning.

“Yes we can, and that’s exactly what we’re going to do.” I told him. “I’m not hurting Niko again.” I told him shaking my head.

“Hey guys,” Jack said walking up to us, I guess no one knew what happened between us last night. “Where’d you guys go last night you disappeared?” He went on.

“We uh-“ Alex began,

“I tripped and hurt my foot last night so Alex helped me back to the room.” I said quickly.

“Dang that sucks, you missed a good night.” He frowned and headed over to where Rian and Vinny were.

“It never happened.” I told Alex.

“Fine, it never happened.” He said and stormed off.

And that was the last of it; I never spoke about it to Jesse or Jack. I just went on like nothing had happened, though every time Niko told me he loved me it felt like someone was dropkicking me in chest. Alex was moved past it as well, and him and I moved on. The tour went on, and went like any normal tour. A few weeks after the incident, Alex and I were getting coffee on a day off in Utah again.

“You know the guy from Sleeping Giant moved here.” I told him as we walked in to the coffee shop.

“How interesting, you realize I can’t stand them right?”

“I don’t see how you can’t they’re underoath with talent and balls.”

“Anyway, so how’s Niko doing?” He asked sarcastically. “You’re never going to tell him?”

“Tell him what?” I replied, not wanting to admit anything.

“You know what I think?” He asked me as we ordered our coffee.

“Nope, nor do I really think I want to.” I mumbled.

“I think the reason why you’re doing this is because you just don’t want to admit its me you want. Niko’s just a ploy to ignore the fact that you and I are meant for each other.”

“I love Niko, I’m marrying Niko in 6 months. I’m going to start a family with Niko, not you. You’re my friend, you’re my boss that’s it.” I told him shaking my head.

“If you loved Niko, you’d tell him.” He retorted, as my phone began vibrating in my back pocket.

I pulled it out, and like a bad repeating dream once again I was thrust in to one of the worst situations I’d ever had to deal with.

March 15th Reminder: new cycle.

“Is that him?” I heard Alex ask, but I darted out of the shop and back to the hotel.

I held the tears in until I got back to my room, where I locked the door and ran in to the bathroom. I paced back and forth hoping I was going to wake up at any given minute now.