Not up to Me, Not up to You

Kelly took a deep breath as she stood outside Johnny’s bar. Why was she so nervous about meeting up with her best friend? This was Jimmy, a guy she had been mates with since they were in kindergarten. Yet again this was the first time she’d be seeing him since she ran out on the wedding. Maybe he’d seen her in a different light.

She mentally slapped herself. Jimmy had never once judged her. He’d always supported her decisions. Had always been there for her. He was her best friend. With another deep breath she opened the door and walked in and spotted Jimmy sat at the bar sipping a beer.

“Hey” she said quietly as she walked up behind him, causing him to turn around sharply.

“Kelly, hey!” he cheered jumping off the bar stool and wrapping his long arms around her, pulling her into a bone crushing hug.

“Jimmy. Can’t breath.” Kelly gasped. Jimmy let go of her and gave her a smile before passing her a bottle of beer.

“Let’s go get a booth.” He said grabbing his beer and placing his arm loosely around her shoulder as he guided them to one of the booths.

“How’s Matt?” Kelly blurted out as soon as they were sat down. Jimmy’s eyes shot up from his beer bottle. The look on his face was not encouraging.

“I’m not going to lie to you. You broke that guy’s heart. I’ve never seen anyone so cut up. We didn’t see him for three days after you left.” Jimmy began to explain.

“Did you give him the letter?” Kelly asked timidly.

“Yeah” Jimmy nodded. “I read it as well.” He added.

“He was angry when I first gave it to him so he flung it back at me. But I kept it and tried again two days ago.” Jimmy continued solemnly.

“He cried Kelly. Really cried. He loves you so much. It’s going to take him a while to come to terms with what’s happened.”

“Jimmy, I love him too. I really do. Just not the same as what I used to. I still care for him.” Kelly pleaded.

“I know Kel; I know. But you were the love of his life. He talked about marrying you since senior year. You’re the only girl he’s ever loved.” Jimmy said sadly as tears began to well up in Kelly’s eyes.

“God I hate myself for what I’ve done to him! But you know how much I believe in fate. If I hadn’t had that argument with Matt that day I wouldn’t have been anywhere near the gas station for Brian to jump in my car; if we hadn’t stopped at the motel I would have been able to drive him out of California and he wouldn’t have been caught by the cops. There are so many little things that have happened that have pulled me and Brian together. Like the fact that his sister was getting married at the same place on the same day as me; and that there was the problem with the wedding before us giving me the chance to wander around the building to bump into him again. And then he turned up at the ceremony!” Kelly rambled as Jimmy nodded.

“Kelly, you know you don’t have to explain yourself to me. I know you don’t make decisions lightly. I know how much you love Matt so if you’re willing to walk away from him for Brian then you must truly believe that Brian is the one you’re meant to be with. You must truly love him.” Jimmy said with a smile.

“I do Jimmy. I can’t explain it. Damn I don’t even understand it myself. But I love him.” Kelly said with a smile as a small tear trickled down her face.

“Hey, you don’t have to explain anything. But it is going to be a while before we all get used to it. Not hanging out with you and Matt at the same time and seeing you with someone else. It’s going to take time.” Jimmy said with a smile.

“So tell me how was Fiji anyway?” he asked with a smile which Kelly returned weakly.

“It was awesome. It’s such a beautiful place. Brian and I really got to know each other out there.” She replied happily.

“I bet you did!” Jimmy said wiggling his eyebrows as Kelly began to blush.

“Ok, we did spend quite a bit of the time in the hotel room; but we did see a lot of the place as well. It was beautiful.” Kelly said with a smile.

“I did get food poisoning though, but not until the last day thankfully.” Kelly added.

“So he’s already seen you puke?” Jimmy asked. Kelly gave a small chuckle and nodded.

“Well, he heard me. I made sure I locked the bathroom door each time so he couldn’t follow me in. he gave up banging on the door after the fourth episode.” She explained with a smile.

“So he was willing to look after you when you were ill?” Jimmy nodded to him self as if he was placing a check mark against a list in his head.

“Yeah, I just wouldn’t let him. Not while I was being sick anyway. That’s not the kind of thing you want your boyfriend seeing when you’ve only just started dating.” Kelly laughed.

“Honey, I think you skipped the part where you dated. You’re already living with him remember?” Jimmy pointed out.

“I guess. But I still didn’t want him to see me being sick." Kelly replied as she started to peal the label off the bottle of beer.

“Kelly? What’s the matter?” Jimmy asked recognising that his best friend was nervous about something.

“I want him to meet everyone.” She mumbled quietly glancing up quickly to gauge his reaction.

“Good. We all want to meet him too.” he replied causing her eyes to snap back to his.

“Really?” she asked timidly.

“Babe, of course we do. If this guy is going to be in your life then we want to get to know him.” Jimmy explained as Kelly began to smile.

“How about you bring him over next week some time? I’ll arrange it with the others.” Jimmy added with a smile.

“I’d like that. “She replied simply smiling.

“Good, now do you fancy grabbing something to eat? I’m starving!” Jimmy said and Kelly nodded enthusiastically as they both grabbed a menu.

“Hey babe.” Brian called from the kitchen as Kelly ran into the house, not even stopping to shut the front door behind her. Brian emerged from the kitchen with a look of confusion on his face as he looked between the open front door and the stairs, where Kelly was disappearing at the top of them. He slowly walked over to shut the door before walking slowly up the stairs behind Kelly.

“Babe? Are you ok?” Brian called down the corridor, trying to find out where she was. His question was answered as he heard the sound of Kelly being sick coming from the bathroom.

“Babe?” Brian repeated from the bathroom doorway as Kelly's stomach gave another lunge and another wave of her lunch fell into the toilet bowl.

“I’m ok.” She mumbled before letting more of her regurgitated food spill from her mouth.

“You are not ok! And this cannot still be food poisoning!” Brian said crouching down beside her and pulling the stray strands of hair away from her face.

“Baby, I’m fine.” She grumbled as he gently rubbed her back.

“No you’re not. If you’re sick one more time you’ve got to go to the doctors.” He argued quietly.

“Brian no, I’m f-“

“Don’t argue! You’ve got to see a doctor if you’re sick again.” he said as he got up and poured her a glass of water and handed it to her.

“Are you going to give me a choice?” she asked taking a sip of water. Brian gently shook his head.

“OK.” She replied simply drinking some more water. “Help me up.” She said reaching out her hand. He took it and lifted her up and pulled her into him, placing a soft kiss on her forehead.

“How was Jimmy?” he asked as she began to brush her teeth to get rid of the taste and smell of sick from her mouth.

“He was good. He wants us to go over his house one day next week so you can meet him and the others.” She replied glancing up at him with a smile.

“Everyone?” Brian asked quietly. Kelly nodded.

“Yeah, well apart from Matt obviously. I can’t see him wanting to come. Jimmy says he’s in a pretty bad way.” She replied rinsing her mouth before sinking into Brian’s open arms. He gently closed his arms around her body and guided the both of them down the stairs to the sofa, where he sat down and gently pulled her onto his chest.