It's Really Happening

After Tiffany and I bullied Eris into dressing up, my mind wandered back to the last time I had been to a show. And as I thought about it, I realized it had been a long fucking time since the last.

It was odd that I had stopped going to so many when I moved to Detroit, despite practically every tour ever always stopped in that city. But when I was alone in my apartment, I found that I’d rather stay home and watch back episodes of Law & Order or write than go out. Maybe it was because I didn’t have many friends in Detroit.

But really I think it was because shows made me miss Josh like crazy.

As we drove to the venue, I suddenly felt as excited to go to a show as I used to before Josh and I started dating. Just knowing that I would be seeing some incredible bands and having a blast with my friends was always enough to put me in a great mood.

Not even the lying bitch on LJ could bring me down at that moment. All I had to do was remind myself, ‘hey, you’re young, you’re with your best friends, and you’ll be seeing the boy you love very soon. Life is fucking sweet.’

The line at the venue wasn’t terribly long, but it brought smiles to our faces to see a good number of kids waiting. In my true weird fashion, a few minutes of standing around semi-quietly turned me into the show-going Abby, who was far more outgoing than normal Abby.

I started humming and shifting my weight from foot to foot, waiting for either one of them to realize what I was doing or ask what the hell I was doing. It was only a matter of time.

“What the hell?” Eris said with a laugh as she stared at me in amusement.

“Tell me whyyy you cry and why you liiie to meee!” I began singing to her and she immediately cracked up while Tiffany just gave me the weirdest look.

“What is it with you and The Beatles?” she asked.

“Well I beg you on my bended knees, if you’ll only listen to my pleeeas! Is there anything I can dooo? ‘Cause I really can’t stand it, I’m so in love with youuu!” Eris had joined in for the falsetto line and after I stopped singing, Tiffany turned around.

“I don’t know these people!” She laughed.

“Oh come on, you know you love me!” I ran after Tiffany and wrapped my arms around her, which made it easy for me to drag her back to Eris.

“Where the fuck is His Tallness and the four idiots?” Eris asked loudly a while later. By that time, the three of us had been waiting in line for about half an hour and some other kids had gotten in line behind us.

“No idea,” I answered as I checked my phone. “You know them, they’re always late.”

“True.”

“Well they better get here soon ‘cause I want some fuckin’ tacos.” Tiffany huffed.

“You always want tacos,” Eris remarked.

“You got something against tacos?” Tiffany moved closer to Eris and they began play fighting and I watched in amusement until I spotted a white van turn onto the street we were standing on.

“Speak of the devil!” I announced, and the other two paused in their quibble and turned around to see the van pull up beside us and the door slid open, engine still running.

At first, it must have looked like a Jackass prank gone retarded (if that’s even possible since they’re quite retarded to begin with) but after it was argued that parking the van and walking was the better idea, most of the kids in the line stopped staring.

Dave, Jimmie, Josh and the three of us headed off down the street with a list of requests from the rest of Every Avenue ‘n crew in hand. Someone had to stay behind and unload, after all. I know I sure as hell wasn’t gonna do it.

After food was purchased and the story of the bitch on LJ had been told at least three times, the guys decided they would do something to reply.

“How is that a good idea?” I asked when Jimmie suggested a video.

“Well, we’ve already gotten a bunch of footage for another tour video, it’d be another fun segment!”

“I think your definition of ‘fun’ and Abby’s may be slightly different,” Eris commented.

“I say do it!” Tiffany added. “Put that bitch in her place! HEY THAT IS MINE!” she yelled at Dave who had picked up her drink and took a sip. He froze and looked at her then down at the drink in his hands.

“I swear this one’s mine!”

“No it’s not! Give it back!”

“Dammit stop switching our drinks!” Dave half-yelled.

“Bitch, don’t tell me what to do!”

By the time we left the KFC/Taco Bell, I think the entire restaurant was glad to see us go. Somehow we never got kicked out of places despite our always being far too loud. Maybe if we were yelled at more often, the guys would take a hint and shut the fuck up. Although knowing them, that was highly doubtful.

On the way back to the venue with the food for others in hand, Josh and I trailed behind the rest as we normally did. It wasn't really logical how a boy with such long legs could manage to walk so slowly, but I wasn't going to complain.

"So when did you find out about this imposter?" he asked.

"About a week ago. Why?" He shrugged as we continued walking, the two of us staring down at the sidewalk instead of at each other. Despite our comforts with one another, we were both awkward creatures at heart.

"Just wondering. Who found it, anyway?"

"Eris." I chuckled. "It wouldn't be so bad if it was just on one site."

"...she's on two? Sure it's the same chick?"

"Oh yeah." I nodded. "Definitely the same one. She practically copied and pasted one onto the other."

"Well that's...awkward." Josh laughed a little and pulled me closer. "It doesn't matter."

"It doesn't?"

"It's weird and sort of disturbing, yeah, but it doesn't matter because she's just jealous of you." He stopped walking and turned to me. "She can never be you because you're all I want."

I felt myself start blushing as he leaned down to kiss me lightly. A moment later I heard a chorus of catcalls and "get a room!" before we parted. Both of us looked up the street to see our fellows all staring with big grins.

"Take a picture, it'll last longer!" Josh called out before he pulled me forward to kiss me again.

"Done and done!" Eris called back. She was never without her camera close at hand.

Once we returned to the venue, the three of us followed the more famous three inside to deliver the tacos to the hungry. Although I had been known as a "band girlfriend" for a while, I still felt uncomfortable going into the venue before doors opened despite everyone always saying "don't worry, you're totally fine."

Something about big, burly security guards made me worry. Might be because most of them were twice or three times my size. Maybe I'm just paranoid, I dunno.

In any case, once the tacos were delivered, Eris, Tiffany, and I sat down on the couch in the green room and hung out while my beloved and the rest went to go set up their equipment. Occasionally one or two would come back into the room to be bums, but I was no stranger to the lonely downtime before a show.

At one point, Dave came in and walked over to the couch, completely ignoring our conversation as he yawned, stretched, and laid down across all of our laps. A moment or two passed by before Eris spoke up.

"Pardon me, David, but what the fuck?"

"What? You're comfy." I rolled my eyes and began playing with Dave's hair (or lack thereof).

"I miss your long hair. It was easier to braid."

"I don't. Pretty much for that reason."

"Whatever, you loved when I would braid your hair."

"Braid Josh's hair! It's longer!"

"What's longer?" Josh asked as he poked his head into the room.

"Not your dick," Tiffany answered.

"It's longer than yours!" He retorted as he walked further into the room.

"That's because my dick is nonexistent!"

"Lies. Your dick is bigger than all of theirs," Eris remarked. Tiffany turned to her and grinned.

"True." She turned back to Josh. "I stick to my original argument."

"Which was...?"

"Fuck if I know."

Once the doors had opened, the three of us milled into the venue with the rest of the kids although we stuck mostly to the merch area. As much as I hated to admit it, I wanted to stay close to Josh just to make sure of...well, of what I wasn't sure.

About ten or fifteen minutes before Every Avenue was due to go on, we headed into the crowd to have some fun. The crowd was of a decent size, mostly female but there were a few more males than the last show I had been to. They were all having their own conversations, but it was clear they were all buzzing with excitement.

When they finally came onstage and began playing, everyone went nuts. Including yours truly. Unlike in past relationships where my boyfriend was in a band, I wanted to come to Josh's shows for two reasons: one, of course, to see him, and two, to enjoy their music. I didn't have to pretend to like their music for his sake; I genuinely loved the music they played.

"Holy shit!" Josh said about halfway through the set. "You guys are awesome!"

"Hell yeah they are!" Dave agreed. He looked directly at me in the crowd and half-smirked before continuing on. "So! I don't know if any of you noticed...but Josh over here got some new jewelry recently."

"It's true." Josh held up his left hand and grinned. "I'm becoming a Jonas Brother and my first step is this ring right here."

The crowd whistled and cheered as the boys onstage laughed. Eris and Tiffany each nudged me from both sides and I just stood there and hoped no one could see how red my cheeks were getting.

"But really," Dave continued, "let's all have a round of applause for Josh, 'cause this motherfucker is engaged!" Murmurs echoed through the crowd amidst more cheers, and I could only imagine the thoughts going through the heads of every girl in the room.

"Who wants to know the best part?" Jimmie asked. The crowd answered with a cheer. "The lucky girl is in this room!"

The moment the words came out of his mouth, Eris immediately latched onto my arm as if she knew I was about to bolt. At that moment, I hated that she knew me so well. Tiffany also wrapped her arms around my waist and grinned up at me.

"How's it feel to know almost every girl in this room wants to be you right now?" she said into my ear.

"Really fucking awkward," I answered.

"Anyway! Before we play this next song, I want you guys to get really crazy 'cause we're filming a video!" Dave cheered and the crowd followed. Once they launched into the song, I lost myself in it and tried to forget what Dave and Jimmie had just blurted out to the whole crowd.

After their set was over, Tiffany, Eris, and I left the crowd to find the guys. Jimmie was the first one I saw, so I went right over to him and slapped him upside the head.

"What was that for?!" he shouted until he realized who had hit him. "Oh. Right."

"You douche." I couldn't help but laugh when Jimmie wrapped his arms around me and begged for forgiveness.

"Remember! You love me!" I patted him on the head and chuckled.

"We'll let you guys chat with your fans," Eris said as she pulled me out of Jimmie's arms. "See ya in the green room."

We commandeered one of the guys' laptops and were perusing it when we found a copy of 'What Happens In Vegas' on the hard drive and decided to watch it while we waited around. About twenty minutes into the movie, Tiffany suddenly gasped and shrieked for no apparent reason.

"OH MY GOD."

"What?!" Eris and I shrieked back.

"PAUSE IT PAUSE IT PAUSE IT!" Eris quickly hit pause and the screen froze just as the camera switched to a shot of Ashton Kutcher. "IS IT JUST ME OR DOES ASHTON SERIOUSLY LOOK LIKE JOSH RIGHT NOW?"

Eris and I looked at the screen for a moment and then at each other, finally turning back to Tiffany with extremely surprised looks on our faces.

"That...is fuckin' creepy." Eris half-shuddered and I looked at the screen again to further study the image. It really was a creepy resemblance.

"What's fuckin' creepy?" Dave asked as he stepped into the room with Josh right behind him, video camera in hand.

"Are you aware that you're Ashton Kutcher?" Eris asked Josh as she flipped the laptop around to show them what she was talking about.

"Whoa! Weird!" Dave laughed. "Anyway!" He grabbed the camera out of Josh's hand and turned it on. "Josh, tell everyone what we just learned!"

"Apparently Ashton Kutcher is jockin' my style." Josh shrugged. "Dude knows his shit." He took a swig out of the beer bottle I hadn't noticed he had until just then, and I rolled my eyes.

"Who gave you a beer?" I asked.

"The bartender," he answered smugly. He then looked at Dave and the two of them suddenly had extremely devious looks on their faces.

"What are you doing?"

"Nothing..." Dave nodded behind me and I turned around just in time for Tiffany and Eris to grab my arms and hold me in place. In the meantime, Dave turned the camera onto himself as Josh came over and had me sit down on the couch next to him.

"Oh god," I muttered. This wasn't going to turn out well for me.

"So!" Dave began, "I'm sure you've all heard by now that Josh is engaged. But what you probably don't know is who he's engaged to. Well, tonight, we happen to have that lovely lady right here!" Dave turned the camera to Josh and me and I did my best to hide my face from the camera's view.

"Internet world, meet my fiancée!" Josh pulled me into view and I nervously waved at the camera.

"Say hello, Abby." Eris chuckled.

"Hello, Abby." Josh rolled his eyes and kissed my temple.

"See why we're together?"

"Because you're both sarcastic douchebags?" Tiffany proposed.

"Pretty much." Dave laughed.