I Don't Want It, I Just Need It.

“Was quite the stunt you pulled there” I knew without so much as a glance who was talking, so kept my eyes fixed on the monitor in front of me. “I’ve heard of ways to get people into your band, but throwing a hissy fit when you’re not even signed ye…”

“Wasn’ a hissy fit” I retorted.

Her smudged red lips tugged into a smirk as I met her wide brown eyes with my own. “I know it wasn’t. Made you talk to me though eh? I know your kind”

“You know nothing about me” I mumbled, looking back toward the floor as I rose from my crouched position and hopped down from the stage. I landed a little awkwardly, a sharp pain surging across the balls of my feet, but I hid it well, she didn’t notice. Or if she did, she was polite enough to humour me.

“We could do something about that”

It was the second time she’d pushed herself against me and as before, I had no idea what to do. I didn’t move when she ran her fingertips slowly from my wrists to just above my elbows, or when she rose to her tiptoes in order to align her mouth with my own. One thrust of her hips against mine though and I came crashing back to reality.

She giggled softly as I backed away from her. My right hand jammed into the front pocket of my jeans in an instant, my left pushing my sweaty hair from where it had become slicked to my forehead. “Or maybe I do know your kind. Girlfriend, right?”

I smiled uneasily before giving her a small nod, a little concerned the she seemed completely undeterred. If anything her amused grin grew even broader, the glint in her eyes a little brighter and I grew un-easier with every second her gaze trailed from the tips of my toes right back to my face.

“She’s at home? You’ve come out on the road to make it big. You miss her, she misses you…you spend every minute you’re not thinking about the show, thinking about her”

“ ‘s really not somethin’ I wish to talk about wi’ you, alright love, ye nice an’ all but…”

“I’m more than nice Oliver” She interrupted, her smirk spreading, dancing between her eyes. “And I know you think the same. Why else would you try and stick your tongue down my throa…”

“I did no such thing love” I guffawed, pushing past her and toward the back room. She’d just lost what little interest I held for her, in one lewd…

“I felt your tongue licking at my lips Oliver, don’t deny that you…”

“Ye mistaken”

“No, you’re mistaken”

I jumped a little as her arm shot out and her fingers wrapped around my wrist smoothly. Her phone number was scrawled messily on my skin before I’d even had a chance to blink and a second, clumsier kiss placed on my cheek as I realised how close we’d actually become to one another.

“Ye forced y’self upon me” I mumbled lamely, finally gathering my thoughts and taking a step back.

“You walked right into me”

“Ye were in my way”

“I am the way”

“Wha’s the sayin’…why ‘av beef burgers when ye got steak at ‘ome?”

“I could be the best burger you’ve ever had. Besides, homes far away I’m guessing? You’re bound to get a little peckish here and there”

“Not ‘ere, not there neither” I smirked, “an I’m a vegetarian”

“Steaks not vegetarian”

“Ye missin’ the point that ‘m not interested”

“And you’re missing mine that I know you are” She caught the roll of my eyes and took a step toward me, poking her manicured fingernail against my chest. “You’re still here aren’t you?”

“Not through lack o’ tryin’ t’get away”

“You can leave at any moment, it’s a bit too loud to answer your phone in here though eh?”

“My phones not ringing”

“So you’re ass just normally rings does it?”

I cursed myself under my breath and dug my hand deep into my back pocket, grappling with my phone as I pulled it from between the layers of tight denim and peered at the screen.

Three missed calls

One new voicemail

“Told you”

“Ye’ve told me a lot of things” I mumbled, crossing the room to duck outside for a moment or two.

“All of them true”

“All o’ them irrelevant more like” I corrected, “Look, can I ‘av some space please, I need to make a…”

“Call your girlfriend” She smiled curtly, following me from the room and out onto the fire escape at the side of the venue, give her one thing, the chick was fucking relentless. “It’s probably not best to tell her that you made out with someone else though, girls don’t like that…I don’t mind, but girls don’t…”

“Fuck you”

“All in good time Oliver” She smirked, brushing past me and continuing down the stairs toward the street.

“Verity’s all I need love so I wouldn’ ‘old ye breath”

She turned, almost in slow motion, as she hopped from the final step and flashed me a smile that knocked me for six.

“Theres a difference between need and want Oliver”

&&

Eleven digits ran between my wrist and elbow, three letters scrawled beneath in a hand I didn’t recognise as my own. I couldn’t focus on anything but the ‘x’ scribed after the ‘S’ and the ‘J’, I couldn’t think of anything other than the real kiss she’d planted on my lips. The ink had faded a little in the half dozen times I’d scrubbed manically at my arm, unfortunately though, the memory was still crystal clear. I could still taste her strawberry lip gloss and I swore I could still feel it sticky on my lips.

I dug my hand deep into the cooler that sat at my feet and pulled out a bottle of water, wiping what I assumed to be condensation from the outside, with the corner of my shirt before bringing it to my lips. I knocked back half of it in one, with thirst usually reserved for marathon runners, men in deserts…Curtis, after one too many doobies. But I couldn’t keep it down. It seemed I was having trouble getting even water past the back of my throat.

I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand in an attempt to catch the remaining water as it dribbled from my lips; the rest of which had collected in a small puddle around my slip-ons, and set the bottle down on the table. It was then that I noticed Curtis leant in the doorway of the van, my phone; in pieces, in his hand.

I had barely been able to hear her over the noise of the party; her end, not mine. But the words I had made out were the reason the contents of my stomach was now decorating the parking lot. The words she’d left on my voicemail less than twenty minutes ago had made me believe that smashing my phone to smithereens was a good idea. I’d made it as far as ‘I think we need t’ talk Oliver…”

I guess its true. Bad news travels fast. Fucking myspace.

“What were all that about in there?” I lazily drug my eyes up to meet his. Surprised by his stony expression, the way in which his lips were twitching rapidly between a smile and a frown, settling finally on the latter. “What the fuck are ye doin’ Oliver?”

His tone was harsh; and one I’d not expected at all, and I jumped a little when he threw the remains of my phone into my lap, it had shattered into more than a dozen pieces; understandable I guess, from the force with which I had smashed it against the wall.

“Thanks, but what dye expect I do wi’ that?”

Curtis sighed loudly and climbed into the van; quite a challenge for someone who stood well over six feet tall, before flopping down onto the seat opposite and slapping his palms against the table. I watched him open and close his mouth a dozen or so times before words finally escaped.

“Guess ‘s a good thing, at least ye can’ call that girl”

“I wasn’ goin’ to” I retorted childishly, folding my arms across my chest.

“ ‘s at why ye’ve got ‘er number written up ye arm”

I rolled my eyes but pulled the sleeve of my shirt down regardless. “I don’t get what ye problem is Curt”

“ ‘m not the one with the problem, Ol”

“Why d’ye care so much?”

“Why d’ye not all of a sudden?” I opened my mouth to object, but he beat me to the punch. “’ow ‘av ye gone from oooo Curtis, she could break my ‘eart at any moment, t’ kissin’ some skank ‘alf way through a…”

“’s not a skank” Even I was surprised at the conviction, the abruptness…my statement itself, and I could do nothing more than sink back into my seat as Curtis shook his head in amazement. “an’ she kissed me, she…”

“Ye kissed, don’t matter ‘o did what first, ye kissed an’…”

“I didn’ hate it” My stomach twisted uncomfortably and I had to gulp down the bile rising rapidly in my throat. My words had seemingly shocked me more than they had Curtis, even though the thought had been flashing through my mind relentlessly since the chaste embrace. “I didn’ mean that, I didn’ mean t’…”

“Ye didn’ mean to let slip aye” Curtis snarled, “But ye sure as hell meant that ye didn’ hate it, in fact, was quite the opposite weren’t it Ol, ye’ve been waitin’ f’ somethin’ like this t’appen. Some drama, ye can’ jus’…”

“ m the one being dramatic? Ye can fuckin’ talk mate. Why d’ye care so much aye? Why are ye…” A thought dawned on me as I stared at the broken shards of my phone lying in my lap. “Ye bastard, ye absolute fuckin’... ‘s not ye place t’ tell ‘er Curt, ‘s not ye…”

“Verity’s givin’ up everythin’ f’you through fear of breakin’ y’eart” He fumed, “An ‘ere ye are, dickin’ about wi’ every girl that bats ‘er eyelashes at ye”

The hollow chuckle that escaped my lips wasn’t one that I knew and I could feel my lips twisting uncomfortably into a sneer as Curtis continued to stare me down. He’d never been one for confrontation, preferring to just let things slide. It took a lot to get a rise from Curtis. It seemed ballsy petite blondes did it for the both of us. Although my rise; though I hated to admit it, was a little different.

And then it hit me, like a junkpunch to the jaw. Veritys giving up everything for you

“An’ I ‘aven’ told ‘er nowt, I know ‘s not my place. An’ I’m ‘opin you’ll take some responsibility f’ once” His anger seemed to have subsided, his voice just reeked of exhaustion. “I know ye think Verity could break y’eart in a second, but I wouldn’ go thinkin’ ye couldn’ do the same. Mistake or no mistake”