Leaving You to Be Forever Seventeen

I walked out of the small one room apartment, slamming the door behind me. I took a rushed step to across the hall, then leaned against the wall and fell down. My chin quivered, and my coal gray eyes clouded with new tears. I heard my parents in the apartment, most likely sprawled across the bed, obnoxiously not knowing or caring that their seventeen year old daughter had been sleeping in the small love seat while they had evolved into bunny rabbits in spring. I cried for more than the fact I had uncaring parents. My aunt and uncle, along with their two daughters, had died in a car crash a few days ago. I was in Baltimore, Maryland for the funeral, and I was miserable. While I loved my other family in the state, the basic situation wasn't helping. They weren't very sociable, and despite my consistent pleading, none of them were able to let me stay with them, so I had to stay with my parents, who would only start caring about me when I started peeing gold and silver. Basically, my life wasn't the best. I wanted nothing more than too pack up and leave for California.
"Oh, shit, my bad," I heard from above me.

I glanced up, sniffling back some snot from my nose. "I'm sorry," I mumbled, getting up and walking away.

"You look like you need a party," the voice said, walking up behind me. Based on the voice, he was young, but not necessarily a teen.

I smiled at him, sniffling again. "And some Bacardi."

"That can be arranged," he smiled. "What's your name, sweets?"

"People call me Ca."

"I'm Alex," he smiled. "I wasn't lying about hooking you up with some Bacardi. I'm actually going to a party right now."

"Sounds fun."

"Come with me?" he asked, turning to me and stopping me.

"I have something to do tomorrow," I answered honestly. The memorial service was tomorrow at 11:30AM.

"So," he smiled, taking my hand. "I'll bring you back here tonight, I promise."

"Okay," I said, nodding. I felt like I deserved a bit of a spontaneity streak.

"So, first things first, why are you here?"

"Most people ask that before they invite someone to their car," I said as we went outside. The warm sun setting nearly obliterated any trace that I had been crying. It was nearly dark, but in the warm August heat, you couldn't tell.

"I do things the other way; if someone is still in my bed, I'll see what I should have been calling them."

"I have a funeral to go to, tomorrow morning," I said, ignoring his claim. I never liked boys like him, but the spontaneity of it all appealed to me more that way.

"Oh, more reason to get you home tonight." Alex started the car, (a nice, yet old car.) and went out of the parking lot and onto the busy street. "I'm sorry about it," he said, looking over at me.

"I was crying because my parents don't care about it. They only brought me here because I lied about going to a university here."

"I can't really say I know how you feel, but I hope I can make it better," Alex smiled, chuckling.

We had arrived at a house, which looked too large to just belong to him. You could tell the party was already in full swing, as loud music blared from the windows. I assumed it was a fraternity house of some sort. "This is my parent's house, by the way. I'm in a band, and when we come home from a tour, we can stay here. They're out of town though, so it's all to ourselves."

"Why were you at the apartments?"

"Sex buddy didn't show up," he said shortly.

My mouth made an "oh" and I nodded. "Are you planning on sleeping with me?" I asked bluntly as we walked to the door.

Alex laughed. "To be completely honest, I'd love to, Ca."

I smiled and looked at him. I got on my tiptoes and wrapped my arms around his neck. His arms instinctively went to my waist. I stared at his brown eyes, and kissed him, catching him off guard. He happily recovered and kissed back. I pulled away, long after the stars came out, and smiled at him. "I'll love you forever," I whispered, hugging him.

"Till you find something better," he added, pulling away and grinning, taking my hand a leading me to the Bacardi.

At four A.M., I woke from my hung over sleep. I glanced down and saw my skinny jeans and tank top scattered on the floor, alongside Alex's. I shook Alex awake, hearing him groan as he rolled off his bed. As I gathered my underwear and clothes, I felt Alex's eyes on the back of my head.

"I want to see you again," he said, waiting for me to turn and put on my jeans.

"You know where to find me."

"I don't want this to be another one-night stand," he muttered, putting on his jeans. When I didn't answer, he asked himself quietly, "What the hell went wrong?"

"I'm seventeen and hung over Alex," I said, pulling my tank top on. It had been the first time I'd had sex with someone I hadn't been dating. I was regretting the idea, but not the act. I hadn't felt so good ever.

"Come listen to my band, Ca?" he asked, standing up and looking at me. "It's at Frankie's Dance Club at 8:30 tomorrow," he looked at his watch. "Tonight."

I nodded, looking down. "Will you write a song about me if I walk away right now?" I asked, admiring the bedroom floor.

He smiled, tilting my head up. "Either way, I will."

My arms, almost unconsciously, went to his neck as he kissed me one last time.

After Alex dropped me off at the guest apartment, I got out and didn't look back. When I creeped into the apartment, I found my parents in the bed, reeking of liquor and sex. I put on a pair of sweats and slipped into a dreamy sleep.

In the morning, my parents threw a pile of clothes on me to wake me up, telling me to get up. I put on my short black dress, and almost immediately had to leave for the funeral.

On the way out, I saw Alex sitting in the yard in the shade, a notebook in his lap. I smiled at him, returning his wave.

My mother and father glared at him, then me, scolding me about "horny teen aged boys." I smirked, thinking, if they only knew.

I went to the club, leaving my parents without a word. I knew that tonight was my last chance to see Alex, to hear him sing. I waited in the back for all the bands to play. I saw on the flyer that All Time Low was the last band, and by process of elimination, decided it was his band. I was nervous, in a way about watching him. Based on the conversations I had heard, many girls were hoping to catch his eye.

To be blunt, Alex's band was amazing. I laughed at the way Alex, along with the other band members had the entire crowd around their fingers. They jumped around effortlessly, even to the last song, and even after playing for nearly an hour, they still sounded great.
Just after their supposedly 'last song' ended, I moved to walk out, along with half the kids in the room.

"Hey, hey, hey, wait a minute, kids! I got a new song!"

Most of the people, including me, stopped and slowly moved back to their previous spots, watching Alex get out his acoustic guitar. "I'm not sure if you're here, but if you are, this is for you," Alex said, holding his guitar, ready to play. "I hope I'm wrong about you. Meet me where we first met if I am."

Murmurs spread through the crowd like waves. I smiled, but kept my eyes on Alex. He started a melody on guitar, keeping his eyes closed, even after he started singing.

"Hey, kid, you've got a lot of potential, but I think it's time to move up. So go on and blow us away with your sound…"

My stomach dropped to my feet as I watched Alex open his eyes and stare at me. He grinned and strummed his guitar, closing his eyes again for a moment, only to open them again and watch me.

"…To all the nights that we forgot to get back home…"

I smiled, finding the truth in Alex's words.

"We're so tired, yet so alive, wrapped up in lies like sheets of another one night stand. You know, you left the girl with nothing but the sunlight through the window pane, where tired eyes will close."My smile hadn’t left throughout the song, but had grown as he said each word. My stomach danced with butterflies; my previous boyfriends had never cared enough to write a song about us, even after the whole relationship, let alone a one night stand.

"I know she hopes I choke on this last drink, drop dead before my influence gets through her head. She said "I'll love you forever or find something better. It's all just the same as when we sleep together. We wake up with headaches and trouble remembering what went wrong.

Stay seventeen, the party scene has got the best of me and you. We've got to let this go."

I smiled and left the small club, giggling as the girls around me bitched about the "new whore-y girlfriend" of their "soul mate for a night, Alex." I hailed a cab when I get outside, and went back to the apartment to wait for something that was more than another one nightstand.