The Night You Took Away a Little More Than Just My Breath

Her hand was placed softly on my chest and her head was resting on my shoulder as I stared at the pages of my history book. "Baby, why don't you pay any attention to me anymore?" She asked.

"I really have to study." I said as I held steady eyes on the printed words and sunk down into my bed even more. I felt her look up at me with her big blue eyes. I looked down at her and gave her exactly what she wanted; Attention. I leaned down, smelled her long blond hair and kissed the top her head. I looked at her and gave her a fake smile.

I didn't have to study at all. I was doing so well in history. I just didn't want to be with Jordan, my girlfriend of about seven months. I have lost all interest in her and this past month I've been trying to be so boring so she'll break up with me. It doesn't seem to be working though. And I can't break up with her. I don't want to hurt anyone.

There was a knock on my door and Jordan quickly sat up next to me. My dad was the only person at my house other than us. He doesn't believe in sex, or any sexual relations I shall say, before marriage and Jordan is very hesitant around him. She doesn't show affection towards me at all when he's around. He wouldn't care if he saw us cuddling or kissing but I think she's a bit too afraid of him. "Come in!" I called out to my dad.

My tall, slim dad opened my bedroom door and stood in the door way. "What are you kids up to?" He asked.

"Studying." I said as I finally pulled my eyes away from the book to look at him. He was brushing his nice, brown hair. We look very similar, same hair color, eyes, nose, etc. We're both even tall, and skinny. He looks like me in 20 years.

"Oh, well I'm off to go meet Casey. I probably won't be back until tomorrow." He said.

"Okay, see you." I said.

"Have fun, Mr. O'Callaghan," Jordan said. My dad smiled at us and walked out of the doorway. When we heard the front door close behind him and his car start Jordan laid back down beside me. "How long has he been with Casey?" She asked.

Casey was my dads girlfriend. They met a month after my parents divorce and he's been seeing her ever since. Casey and my dad have been together for over four months and I've only met her once. She seems pretty cool and he's crazy over her. They're always together on weekends, no matter what.

"About four months." I said as I closed the book. "Want something to eat?"

"Sure." Jordan replied.

We both walked down into the kitchen. The neon green numbers on the microwave caught my eye. It was almost eight o'clock. "What do you want?" I asked her as I opened the fridge door.

"Actually, nothing. My parents are going out tonight so I have to baby sit my baby brother at eight." She sighed while she sat on the counter. "I better get going, I only have ten minutes to get home."

"Okay." I said as I gave a fake pout. "See you-"

"Monday." She finished my sentence. "I'm really busy this weekend."

"Okay." I said as I gave another fake pout. She smiled at me and I followed her to the door. She gave me a hug and looked up at me expecting to say something. "Goodnight?" I said, but it came out sounding like a question more than a statement. Jordan's smiled fell and she said goodnight quietly. I kissed her cheek and she walked out of the house.

I went back into the kitchen and pretended to get something to eat. She could still see me through the kitchen window thats right in front of the drive way. Her headlights lit up my kitchen even more and I watched from the corner of my eye as they made their way down the street.

I put the bread back in the bag and the knife back in the sink. I quickly put the peanut butter and jelly away and ran over the the couch. I pulled my phone out of my back pocket and called Pat. The phone rang a few times before he finally answered. "Hello?"

"Pat!" I yelled, probably sounding a little too excited. "Where are you?"

"My grandma's 86th birthday party, why?" He shouted over all his loud family members.

"Well, when is it gonna be over?" I chuckled. "I want, well, I need you to come over."

"I'll be over in a few minutes then." Pat simply said and hung up on me. I put my phone in my hoodie pocket and stared at my feet. My socks had holes in them and my right big toe was sticking out.

Pat was the only one of my friends that knew about my situation. He knows I don't like Jordan at all anymore and he knows that I don't like breaking up with girls. I just don't feel like dealing with all the tears and bad feelings. Jordan does seem like one of those girls that would cry her eyes out in front of you just to make you feel bad. She also seems like one of those girls that would keep calling and begging to take her back.

A few minutes it only was. Pat was walking in my front door before I knew it. He sat next to me on the couch and crossed his legs. He smelled like old people and birthday cake. "It's about Jordan, isn't it?"

"How'd you know?" I asked him.

"You always have that same miserable, boring look on your face when you talk about her." He laughed. I laughed too and thought about what I wanted to start talking about first.

"She just left." I simply said.

"Did she invite herself over?" He asked.

"Yeah, I told her I had to study."

I began to tell Pat all the details.

"Oh come on Johno, I won't be over there long." She said. I pressed the phone close to my ear and looked through my book bag.

"But I really have to study for that history test on Monday." I protested as I spotted my history book lying beneath my chemistry binder.

"Yesterday you told me you'll get a 100 percent on it, you don't have to study."

"It turns out I do." I gave out a fake laugh. "I forgot about a few things thats on it."

"Well we can study together." She said. "I'll be over in an hour."

"The line went dead after that. There was no way to say that simple two letter word to her. No." I told Pat. "There's never a way to say no to her. She makes it impossible for the little word to come out of my mouth."

"Just yell at her and scream 'No! No, you can't come over!' " Pat yelled. I laughed at him and we fell silent for a few seconds. But Pat broke that silence with, "Break up with her the next time you see her."

I sighed and thought to myself. I don't even want to see her 'a next time.' She wastes my time and it's just plain annoying to be around her. Then my phone vibrated in my pocket. I pulled it out and flipped it open. "She just texted me." I said before I even opened the text message.

"What'd she say?" Pat asked as he scooted closer to me. I opened the text and read it out loud.

" 'You never tell me you love me any more. I was waiting for you to say it while we stood in the door way before you askedgoodnight. But you didn't and now I'm worrying. Do you love me or not?' " I read to pat. I looked up from my phone and saw pat looking at the floor thinking.

"Tell her you don't- well," Pat started. "I don't know."

"I'll just say..." I said as I hit reply. " 'I'm not sure if I love you or not. Because we're still young and I have no idea what love is.' "

"There you go!" Pat said pointing at me. "So when you gonna break up with her?"

"I have no idea." I said as I put my phone back in my pocket. "Hopefully soon. I want to get it over with. But uh, are we still on for the mall tomorrow?"

"Yeah. Eight. We're just gonna hang out, catch a movie or something. But if you want to go shopping then bring money."

"I'll be there." I smiled at him. "Anything that doesn't involve being with or ever around Jordan."