Skin and Bones

I think the social worker is confused by the fact that I can’t stop smiling. I just got beaten up by my mom who’s now in jail, and I’m smiling? But honestly; I can’t stop.
My boyfriend told me that he loved me. I didn’t say it back and he said he understood, but I do plan on saying it. I just have to find the right moment. If the words have to really mean something, they have to be said at the right time – in the right place and way. But it still has to be spontaneous.
Love is so hard.

Gerard walks into the cafeteria and he finds us quickly. Our eyes stay locked together as he walks towards me. Mikey and the social worker are here too, but he only stares at me.

“Hi,” he says quickly – shyly – before he sits down next to Mikey and looks down at his tray. He’s obviously blushing.

“Hey,” I respond – still with a huge smile on my face. Mikey rolls his eyes.

“Hi bro’.” His attention returns to his comic as he chews on his sandwich.
I begin to unpack my own. I actually bought an entire sandwich. I really want to look healthy and okay for this dude, who’s currently sitting beside me – writing down everything. I’ve tried looking over his shoulder a few times, but I simply can’t read his messy handwriting. He seriously needs to go back to school.

My head pops up when I feel Gerard’s feet wrap around mine. I blush.
We decided to keep us a secret. If the social worker knew that we were a couple, I’m sure he’d take me away in a heartbeat – no questions asked. We all agreed on it over breakfast, and Gerard made sure to text Ray and Bob.

“Yo!” Speak of the devil…
Ray’s puffy hair breaks my view of Gerard’s gorgeous eyes and when I zoom out and focus on Ray, I see him snatch Mikey’s comic out of his hands.

“Hey!” Mikey exclaims outraged. I giggle.

“Hello to you too,” Ray says politely. He waves his hand at me and motions for me to scoot over and I have to “accidentally” push the social worker to do so. I see Gerard giggle silently out of the corner of my eye.
Luckily, Bob decides to sit down next to Gerard, so our feet quickly find each other again.
Mikey tries to snatch back his comic, but Ray’s faster.

“Ray,” Mikey whines as he tries again.

“Nice little boys share their toys, Mikey-Wikey.” I give Gerard a cheeky grin, which he quickly returns. So much for nice.
Mikey gives up on getting his comic back, and settles for slouching over the table and pout.

“So, what’re you guys doing this weekend?” Bob asks, before he takes a bite of his sandwich. Mine and Gerard’s play of footsy come to a sudden holt, and I look down and focus on unwrapping my sandwich.
Gerard says something, but I don’t quite hear it.
I really do hope I’m still here this weekend.

I hold the sandwich in my hand and watch as the salad and tomatoes are slowly sliding out from between the white slices of bread.
I can do this.
Gerard’s foot softly caresses mine, and when I look up, he looks sympathetic – smiling understandingly.
I smile back, before I bring the sandwich to my lips and take a bite. It’s not a big bite, but it’s bigger than the bites I took of the dry cornflakes I ate this morning.
I focus on Gerard’s eyes as I chew quickly – desperate to get the mushy substance out of my mouth.
I swallow.
Gerard’s smile grows. So does my courage.