Playing House

Ben was staring at me, his eyes begging me to say something.

I nodded at him, answering his silent question, and he put Beau and Maddie down.

“You’re having triplets?” He asked, approaching me.

“Yeah,” I whispered. He gave me a small smile, but it was immediately replaced by confusion and anger. “I told them to tell you.”’

“And we tried,” Duncan intervened. “You wouldn’t listen Eags, so don’t you dare go and get angry with her.” Ben clenched his jaw and looked back up at me, trying to calm himself down.

“I need to go for a walk or something,” he mumbled, turning around. “I’ll pick them up from your…hotel room in a few hours.”

He walked out just after that, leaving an awkward silence in his wake.

I left soon after with the twins, avoiding Lyss and Duncan's sympathetic looks, and we walked to the hotel which was just a block and a half over. I got them ready to go to Ben’s for a few days, packing them some clothes and what not. A little bit later there was a knock on the door, and I groaned.

I had literally just sat down, and my back and feet were killing me. I pushed myself up nonetheless, opening the door to reveal Ben.

“Hi,” I greeted. He walked in, ignoring me, and greeted Beau and Maddie. I shut the door and walked over to the bags, trying to bend over to pick them up.

“I got it,” Ben said, grabbing my arm and halting me. I looked at his hand, which was practically burning my skin. It had been so long since he had touched me, and it was a shock to the system to say the least.

Ben pulled away, seemingly unaffected, and grabbed the bags. He effortlessly tossed them over his shoulder, and I leaned against the wall to take some stress off my feet.

“You’re not actually still working, are you?”

“Yeah, I am. Not tonight though,” I told him.

“Mal, look at you. You can’t actually be serious. You sit down at work, right?”

“No, I’m a waitress,” I said, not believing that he really didn’t know. I mean, I know everyone said he refused to talk or listen about me, but actually seeing evidence of his indifference kind of stung a bit.

“When are you going on maternity leave?” He asked.

“When I’m giving birth,” I joked. Ben just glared at me, un-amused. “I can’t afford not to work.”

Ben shook his head, calling Beau and Maddie over. They hopped into his arms excitedly, and he headed towards the door.

“Call me if anything happens,” I requested.

“I can handle it,” Ben quipped.

“I didn’t say you couldn’t, I just want to know,” I argued.

“Well, if something happens, I’ll see if I remember to call you.”

“Ben, please don’t be like this. I’m just asking you to let me know if something’s wrong,” I explained.

“Yeah. Because you were so open with me,” he remarked. “Tell you what. If something goes wrong, I’ll pack up the kids and run over to the nearest Holiday Inn.”

He turned around and walked out after that, not letting me say anything. By the time I waddled out into the hall, he was in the elevator, and the doors were closing. I shuffled back into the room, shutting the door behind me, and collapsing back against it.

Besides the fact that I was going to cry anyways, being pregnant didn’t help my emotions. I cried for what seemed like hours, and I knew that I couldn’t continue on like this forever.

The next few days seemed to pass by like years, because when I was at the hotel room I had absolutely nothing to do and no one to talk to. At least the twins kept me preoccupied and kept my mind off of Ben-related things. But now, I had all the time in the world to reflect on all my mistakes and realize what a failure I was.

Ben and I never really set a time frame on this whole switching off thing, so I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to go pick the twins up or if he was going to bring them back to the hotel.

One day, when I just couldn’t stand it anymore, I made my way over to Ben’s house. I rang the bell, and a few moments later Ben swung the door open. He glared at me, almost questioning why I was there.

“I know we never discussed dates or anything but I missed them,” I shrugged. And it was true. I had never been away from my kids that long, and it was eating me up. Ben wordlessly backed away and walked into the house. Since he left the door open, I assumed I could go in, so I did.

And that’s when I saw them.

No, not my children.

Red. Pumps.

As in, the high-heeled shoe.

My breath caught in my throat for a second, but I realized I couldn’t get upset. Ben and I weren’t together anymore. He could see whoever he wanted. I could not get upset.

Okay, that’s a lie. I could get upset, but I definitely couldn’t get angry.

I finally was able to tear my gaze away from the shoes long enough to walk into the living room, where I saw Ben getting the kids ready to leave.

“Mommy!” Beau called out to me. Maddie looked up and smiled, and Ben remained silent the whole time. The living room was a mess with all their toys strewn about, and I refused to let them leave it that way.

“Why don’t you guys pick up your toys before we leave,” I ordered lightly. They obliged right away and I looked up at Ben. “Can I please talk to you?” I requested.

He walked out of the room and into the hallway, so I followed.

“What?” He asked harshly.

“Please, stop being like this,” I choked out, suddenly getting emotional. “It kills me when you’re so mean-”

“When I’m so mean? Would you rather I be talking about our loveless relationship?” He quipped.

“I’m sorry, okay? I know I shouldn’t have listened to Eleanor but you said yourself that she was a good manipulator,” I argued.

“And yet, you still listened to it.”

“And I’m sorry. I was wrong, I should have talked to you, I’m sorry. I don’t know what else you want from me,” I ended with a whisper. I was trying to hold tears back, but they were already brimming my eyes.

“Look Mal. We’ve both made some pretty shitty mistakes throughout the course of this relationship. But I think it’s time we hang up the white flag, you know? I think we’re trying to make something out of nothing, and we only hurt each other worse in the process,” he explained. “You know I’ll be there for the twins, and for you, and the triplets, but I don’t think we should be together. We’ve pretty much fried our relationship, and I for one don’t think I can handle any more of it.”

I stared at him for a moment, trying to think of something to say, but before I could even begin to comprehend what he had told me, I saw her.

The assumed owner of the red high heels.

“Ben! There you are! Oh, hello,” she greeted. She was probably one of the most gorgeous girls I had ever seen, and I felt insanely fat and ugly in comparison.

“Hi,” I managed.

“I’m Leah,” she said, sticking out her hand.

“Um. Amalia,” I said, shaking it.

“Oh! Ben’s old maid, right?”

I didn’t like the way she said ‘old maid,’ but it was obvious she didn’t mean it negatively, so I nodded.

“Well I can see why you couldn’t work anymore. You look ready to give birth any second,” she laughed. “How far along are you?”

“Four months,” I told her.

“Only four months?! What do you have in there, an alien?” She exclaimed.

“Triplets,” Ben and I said simultaneously. He cleared his throat awkwardly, glancing between Leah and I.

“Leah is my new housekeeper,” he informed. I nodded again, still uncomforted by this girl’s beauty and personality.

As if she wasn’t perfect on the outside, let’s make her amazing on the inside.

Wonderful.

There was no way Ben didn’t absolutely love her. I just met her, and I already took a liking to her. It was hard not to, what with her…bubbly-ness. I looked over at Ben, and sure enough he was glancing at Leah.

“God Ben, offer the poor girl a place to sit,” Leah laughed.

“She’s not staying,” Ben shot down. “She’s just here to pick up the twins and go.”

“The twins are yours too?” She asked, astonished. I nodded once again. “Gosh woman. You’re a freaking baby machine.”

I smiled at her again, and she walked away after offering to go see if the kids were ready. Ben looked at me expectantly, knowing I would have some kind of comment.

“What?” I asked him. He shook his head, saying nothing. “She’s nice,” I noted.

“Yep.”

“And pretty,” I added.

“Very,” Ben agreed.

"How well do you get along?"

"Extremely well," he stated, forcing out a smile. It was a smile that said, 'I don't want to talk to you, but I'm obligated.'

Yes, there are different kinds of smiles, and I knew all of Ben's.

I didn’t have time to say any more, as Leah came back with the twins.

“All set,” she announced. I thanked her and she walked away, sensing that Ben and I needed to speak alone.

“So, when did you want to do this again?” I asked him.

“I’m free whenever,” he shrugged.

“That’s not vague or anything,” I remarked.

“Leave it up to them,” he shrugged. “If they want to come see me, then call me.”

“They always want to see you,” I told him.

“Alright, fine. How about next week I’ll take them the same time. I’ll pick them up from Duncs’ place,” he decided.

“Okay. I’ll have them bring their bags that day,” I said. He nodded and walked away, so I took that as my cue to leave with the kids.

Another month went by, and Ben and I continued to switch off with Beau and Maddie. They were starting to get really confused about why we were separated, and I knew we’d have to explain it to them soon.

Something that started bothering me, however, was the frequency in which the twins would ask for him. They wanted to be around him all day, everyday, and I was starting to feel a bit unwanted. I mean, I know the triplet pregnancy was preventing me from playing with the twins, but they almost never wanted to be around me anymore.

I was now the size of a house, and my whole body ached from fatigue. I had to go to Ben’s house and pick up the twins though (because that’s where they always were), which really just meant I wouldn’t be able to go back to the hotel and crash immediately like I wished I could.

The babies constantly kicked, giving me practically no peace as I waited for Ben to answer his door. I felt a little dizzy, and I knew I needed to cool off for a bit.

He opened it a few moments later, seeing me leaning against the wall and blowing hair out of my face. He rolled his eyes but said nothing, even though I knew he disapproved of me still working and such. He had reverted to giving me the silent treatment unless it was absolutely necessary, despite my attempts at getting him to speak with me.

I didn’t see Leah, or her red pumps, so I assumed she was out.

Ben started walking up the stairs, presumably toward the twins’ room.

“Ben,” I called, wanting to talk to him before he woke them up. He ignored me, as usual, so I sighed and followed him. He had just reached the top when I noticed something did not feel right. I leaned against the railing, holding my stomach. “Ben?” I called again, more urgently. He picked up on the tone of my voice, because it seemed like he was in front of me in a flash.

“What is it?” He asked frantically.

“Something…something’s wrong,” I told him, feeling woozy. I clutched my stomach, and I felt my knees give out short after. Ben caught me and hoisted me up bridal style, carrying me back downstairs. He laid me on the couch and leaned over me, brushing the hair out of my eyes.

“Mal? Come on stay with me,” he said, trying to keep me awake. He pulled out his cell phone and dialed something, and continued to caress my face. He felt my forehead and got up, causing me to panic.

“Ben,” I choked out. I heard him talking on his phone, but everything was becoming cloudier. He came back with a fan, setting it in front of me and plugging it in.

“It’ll be okay,” he assured, after hanging his phone up. He came back over to me and grabbed my hand. “Everything’s going to be fine.”

That was the last thing I heard as I passed out.