Baby, You Are the Weapon I Choose

“Good job last night,” my dad congratulated me as I came into the kitchen. He, my mom, Kevin, Nick, and Frankie were all standing around the islander, waiting for me, as was usual on interview days. Especially after a job. The double life took too much out of you.

“Thanks,” I mumbled as I grabbed a fork and knife from the drawer and sat in the empty islander seat. My mom placed a plate of pancakes in front of me.

“It was sloppy,” Kevin countered, as he usually did. I sighed, rolling my eyes. Kevin usually found something wrong with every job I went on. “You shouldn’t have taken Nick with you. That was too dangerous.”

“Hey, I can take care --,” Nick started.

But I cut him off, glaring at Kevin. “He’s going to have to learn eventually,” I said. “Besides, it’s not like I wasn’t careful.”

My parents sat there, watching us. They always had encouraged small sibling rivalries to keep us at the top of our game in jobs. However, seeing as Nick wasn’t exactly in the business yet, it was Kevin and I who really got the bunt of it. We were always checking each other, always trying to show which of us were better. It was tiring to say the least. Kevin was more into than I was really. I knew he hated this life more than anyone, though I didn’t know why. I also knew he wouldn’t outright say he hated it. Because this was our life. There were no changes, no guarantees. And though I felt bad for him sometimes, he could be a dick enough for me not to care – too much.

“And I wanted to go,” Nick added.

“Wanted to or not,” Kevin said. “It was irresponsible of Joe.”

“Thanks dad,” I rolled my eyes. “Just face it Kevin, you’re mad because Dad asked me to train him and not you.”

“Alright guys,” my dad finally cut in as Kevin opened his mouth. “Joseph, finish your breakfast.”

I sighed, and turned back to my food. “Good job though last night Nick,” I told him, smirking. “Very stealthy. The camera thing was good. You were paying attention.” I put my fist out to hit his.

“I learn from the best,” he hit his fist with mine. But then, he looked at Kevin. “I was just kidding.”

Kevin glared at me instead of Nick. “I’m going to go get something,” he said, walking out of the kitchen.

I sighed as Nick smirked at me. “You did that on purpose, didn’t you,” I asked.

He smiled innocently. “That’ll show him that I can handle the dangerous.”

“Finish your food,” our mom rolled her eyes.

---

“And we are back with the biggest teen sensation to hit the nation since the boy band battle between Backstreet Boys and N’Sync,” Ellen said. “And here they are, from Wyckoff New Jersey, Nick, Joe, and Kevin of the Jonas Brothers.”

There was an eruption from the crowd as we walked out to the couch. After hugging Ellen, we sat down. Unfortunately, we sat Nick, then me, then Kevin. “How are you boys doing,” she asked. “You guys are not on tour right now, correct?”

“That’s right,” Kevin answered. “We actually aren’t touring for the rest of this year.”

“But we are doing small venues here and there,” Nick said.

“Just little shows for our fans,” I added. For our fans at places where our jobs would be.

“Now you guys, honestly,” Ellen said. “You three are like the epitome of brothers. You guys tour together, perform together, write together, travel together, love together, and are basically just together all the time. I got to ask. Don’t you guys just get sick of each other? I mean, don’t you want to just kill each other sometimes?”

We all chuckled without meeting each other’s eyes. “Well we do get into our sibling squabbles,” Kevin started answering it. “But they’re usually about small stuff, like Joe wearing Nick’s socks.”

“That was once,” I pointed out. I wanted to glare at him. Leave it to him to come at me so subtly in an interview.

Nick laughed, rolling his eyes. “And it was gross. I hate when people wear my socks.”

“That’s cause you color code and label them all,” I rolled my eyes. “And just initialing them NJ for Nick Jonas isn’t enough. He has to add the J for Jerry too.”

“Oh yeah,” Kevin laughed as Nick rolled his eyes. “But then again, that’s just so you don’t mistake it for New Jersey.”

They laughed, and I smiled. Stupid Kevin. We got through the rest of the interview without much spectacular events. We finished, and went back stage, heading to our dressing rooms. I accidentally bumped into someone on the way to mine. “Oh I’m sorry,” I said, grabbing her before she fell. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to save all the things in her hands. The coffee also spilled on her.

“Oh crap,” she said, dabbing at her blouse. “Hot, hot, hot!”

I got a good look at her. She was beautiful. “Oh shit, sorry,” I said, taking a paper and trying to help her.

She started laughing. “Um thanks,” she said, taking the paper from me.

I turned slightly red. “I really am sorry. I’m not usually this clumsy, I swear.”

She smiled. “Don’t worry about it. Mistakes happen.” She looked at her watch. “Ellen is going to be expecting me. I need to tell her about a change in her appointments today.”

“Oh, you work for Ellen,” I asked. This girl was kind of cool.

She smiled. “I’m her new assistant.”

“Ah the newbie,” I observed.

“Guilty,” she blushed slightly.

“Well Miss—“ I looked at her for her name.

“Oh right, sorry,” she stuck out her hand. “I’m Christine.”

“I shook her hand. “I’m Joe.”

“I know,” she blushed.

“Well, Christine,” I said. “I insist on you letting me buy you another coffee.”

She laughed. “Alright, but um – how about another time?” She held up her wrist to indicate her watch. “I’m already late.”

“Joseph,” Kevin called me. He sounded agitated.

I sighed. “I have to go. But I’ll be in touch, promise. I owe you a coffee after all.”

She laughed, and walked away as Kevin grabbed my arm. “Why the hell were you talking to her?”

“What’s wrong with her,” I demanded.

He sighed, his expression turning slightly softer. “I’m warning you Joe. Don’t fall for her.”

“I’m not,” I rolled my eyes. “I was just talking to her.”

“You don’t know who she is, do you,” he asked.

“Obviously not.”

“She’s our next job.”