Abercrombie & Bitch

Friday, April 24, 10:00pm – Zach’s coat closet

My. Fists. Hurt.

Zach and I spent an entire hour coming up with ways to get out of this place, and to no avail. I had my cell phone, but there was little to no signal in the little closet. Zach had left his in his bedroom. We tried to pound our way through the door, but no one heard anything over the music. I even tired unlocking the door with a bobby pin like those little kids do in the movies.

Didn’t work.

“Cut it out, Miri,” Zach muttered ruefully, narrowing his eyes at me, “We’re stuck. At least until someone turns the music down.”

“We can’t be stuck!” I hissed, slamming my fist onto the door for the thousandth time. “Open this freaking door! God!” I pounded the door one last time before sinking onto the floor.

“Open sesame?” I mumbled pathetically.

Zach chuckled somewhere close to my ear. I hadn’t realized he was so close to me. Stupid dark closet… It brought back some unpleasant memories of seven minutes in heaven.

“We’re trapped,” he stated, leaning his head against the wall.

I rolled my eyes, and was thankful he couldn’t see me. “Thank you, Captain Obvious. Any other earth-shattering discoveries you’d like to inform me of?”

“Nope. I’m good.”

I glared at him, though I was still having trouble locating him. I mean, I knew he was sitting next to me because his arm just brushed mine, sending tingles through my body… Wait a second. I hadn’t felt that way about anyone since…

Since I almost kissed Rob.

Things on that front hadn’t gotten better, but they hadn’t gotten worse. It was like nothing had ever happened. Well, nothing had happened. It wasn’t like I could ever like Rob as more than a friend, and it was highly unlikely that Rob would ever like me. I was two years younger and his employee. Even though we’d known each other for a while…

Aw, hell, I have no clue what to think anymore.

I heard Zach thump his head against the side of the closet. “I’m bored, Muffin Bear. Entertain me.”

I rolled my eyes. “How am I supposed to do that?” I asked, choosing to ignore the fact that he had called me Muffin Bear without the presence of others. That didn’t mean anything specific, right? “We’re in a closet.”

His arm brushed against mine again as he lifted it to run his hand through his hair. I shuddered, hoping it would go unnoticed. “Well… Now that we’re alone… with no distractions…” His tone was implying something. Something that made me nervous. “We need to talk.” Um, okay, not what I had expected.

I furrowed my eyebrows at him. “What is it with you and talking? Isn’t that my job?”

I hadn’t realized it until I said it that I was implying I was something more to him than a fake girlfriend – at least, I think. That hadn’t been my intention.

He didn’t notice. “I guess so,” he chuckled, shifting position. When he spoke again, his voice was serious. “I just… I’m just trying to figure out what happened. To us.” I could feel him turn to me, despite my now-hammering heart. I did NOT want to talk about this. “Miranda. What happened to us?”

A million different responses flew through my head at that moment, but I really didn’t know which one to pick. And anyway, I couldn’t figure out how to move a single inch of my body voluntarily. Zach’s face was just a few inches from my own. Like that night before freshman year.

Memories flashed through my head. Little bits and pieces, really, but they formed a decent enough picture.

“I’ll always be here, Miranda. I promise.”

“Things are going to be different in high school. But… not us.”

“Why the hell would I want to hang out with a loser like you?”

I clenched my fists and tried to calm myself down. “You… you called me a loser. And a whore. In front of everyone!” My breathing picked up. “And I didn’t even know what I’d done. How could you do that, Zach?! God, all that time I’d thought we were friends! I even-”

I clamped my mouth shut. I’d almost told him what would have made everything worse: that I’d been head over heels for him, even then. And that maybe… maybe I wasn’t completely over it. Damn. How could I just be realizing this now? I told myself it was because I was stuck in a closet with him.

Yeah, that’s probably it.

He was deathly quiet for a few seconds. It was almost painful, but it would’ve been worse if I hadn’t been panting like a dog from my outburst.

Then, his voice was hurt. “You… Even what?”

My throat clenched. Should I tell him? How could he not have figured it out already? It wouldn’t do anything… He’d just make fun of me. I was such a loser back then… He’d said it all.

I stared at him. I could just barely make out his face, so close to mine, what with the lighting and all. He looked… Hell, I didn’t know. His face reminded me of those times that Bryce had tried to get me to talk to him. They were few, but it happened. Zach’s face… it was that one. The one he’d used on me so many times, and it never ceased to make my heart race.

What the hell is he doing to me?

“Even what, Miranda?” he asked, a little louder this time. I just barely heard his voice quiver. “Please. Tell me.”

“It doesn’t matter,” I protested, hugging my legs tighter to my chest.

“Yeah, it does. Come on. Something went wrong with us when we were freshmen. I was an asshole. I’m so, so sorry, Miranda. But you’ve got to tell me what you were going to say.”

Both his voice and his eyes were pleading. Every part of me was saying that I shouldn’t trust him, playing back the memory of That Day. But there was a part of me that remembered the old Zach, and wondered if this Zach – the one that was sitting right here in front of me – could possibly be the same one.

Dear God, I hoped so.

I sighed. “I… I don’t know. I liked you, Zach,” I confessed, letting my hair fall into my face so that maybe he wouldn’t be able to see me, “More than you liked me. And I – I was just so hurt. I know you didn’t care about me that way, but-”

“Wait a second, Mandy.” He held up his hand for a second before tentatively resting it on my knee. He leant in closer to me so that he was looking at my face. “You actually think I didn’t care about you?” He shook his head incredulously. “Why do you think I kissed you? Why I spent so much time with you?”

“You weren’t willing to give up your precious reputation,” I spat, “You just had to do what your friends told you-”

He scoffed. “I was fourteen! How was I supposed to know what to do? It was hard enough knowing I was in fucking love with you, let alone what my friends thought of you. I was scared, alright? I was scared that you didn’t like me back. And scared of losing you.”

My eyes must’ve looked like saucers. “You… what?”

He recoiled, just a little, upon realizing what he’d said. He sighed. “Yeah. I…” He ran a hand through his hair, taking a shaky breath. “Miranda, I’ve been in love with you since we were in eighth grade, okay?” He looked back up at me, his blue eyes burning. “I… I think I still am.”

My head was spinning. If I wasn’t already sitting, I would’ve collapsed by now. Zach had been my sworn enemy for four years, and now he’s trying to tell me that he’s in love with me?

I didn’t say anything.

“Say something,” he begged, turning my chin to face him, “Please.”

I stared at him. “Are you insane?” I hissed, “Is that it? You’re not in love with me, Zach. We’re just pretending to-”

“That’s just it!” His voice was louder now, but no so much that other people would be able to hear. “I’m not pretending! I haven’t been pretending. Every time I see you, I want to kiss you. Every time I see Bryce, and think about what he did to you…” He shook his head again.

I laughed humorlessly. “Yeah. You are insane.”

He stared at me intently for a few seconds. “I’m not insane. I’m not lying, Miranda. Why won’t you believe me?”

My head shot up to look him in the eyes. “Because! There’s no reason why you would ever-”

He didn’t let me finish my sentence. Before I could comprehend what was happening, Zach had cupped my face in his hands and kissed me. His lips were warm and firm on mine, just like the last time we kissed… only now, I have to say, I was enjoying this much more. I hated myself for it.

Slowly, His hands moved down to my waist. Mine were already entangled in his hair, messing it up. His lips parted under mine slowly, deliberately, as if he’d been planning this for a while.

My heart was pounding along with the beat of the music. My head spun and fireworks exploded wherever my skin made contact with his. I hadn’t had a kiss like this since…

…Well, about four years ago.

I didn’t know how it happened, but suddenly I was flat on my back. Zach was still kissing me, and straddling my waist. How he managed to do that without breaking the kiss in the dark, I have no idea. Everything was kinda fuzzy; I was only aware of Zach and his lips and how they felt on mine. I’d forgotten this feeling. It was different than the way it was with Bryce, even when we were first going out. With Bryce, there always had to be something more. But Zach… It was more real. Genuine.

I gasped as he pushed his hips into mine and let out a tiny, almost inaudible moan – but that was enough to make him tighten his arms around me and kiss me harder. I knew where this was going.

And I wasn’t ready for that.

“Zach,” I breathed, wrenching my lips away from his. He wasn’t affected; he just kept planting kisses along my jaw bone. “Zach,” I said, a little louder.

He finally leaned back. “What’s wrong?” His face was worried, like he’d done something wrong, and a little hurt. “What did I do?”

“N-Nothing,” I panted, squirming under his intense gaze. “I-I’m just not ready… for… that.”

Understanding washed over his face. “Oh.”

It didn’t hit me until then what had happened. I had just freaking made out with Zach Sinclair. Who was my enemy since freshman year. Who called me a whore in front of the entire popular group. Who was, apparently, in love with me.

I stared up at him, eyes wide. What the hell had I done?

Suddenly, there was a loud knock on the door. “Miranda?” Riley called, giving the door a sharp knock, “Zach? Are you guys in here?”

I swallowed hard and stood up shakily, ignoring the fact that Zach was staring at my every move. “Riley, it’s locked.”

“Miranda?” It was Elle. “How long have you been in there?”

I took another glance at Zach. “Too long. Way, way too long.”

Why does love always feel like a battlefield,
A battlefield,
A battlefield?
I guess you better go and get your armor…