Poprocks and Coke: If I Can't Have Both, Which Do I Choose?

Thank you to Dark Mystique for the gorgeous banner!

***

"Mom, I'm going out tonight! Will you and dad be here when I get back?" you called out from the upstairs hallway as you leaned your body on the staircase railing. "MOM!" you shouted louder after a pause of silence.

You were about to shout out for your mom again, but before you could even let your voice escape your mouth, Kyle came out of his bedroom and said, "They left for the night, so don't bother."

I blinked at him and then smirked, "Finally you decide to step out of your dark room."

He groaned, "Whatever." He seemed so dark these days; wearing dark clothes, living in a dark room almost all day, thinking dark thoughts.

After a silent short pause, Kyle looked back at you and kept his eye on your sweater - his sweater; "Why are you wearing my clothes?"

You smirked, "Because they're comfy and my clothes are just all tight and make me look slutty," you joked, hoping it would have made him go away.

He groaned disgusted, "Then by all means, wear it."

You grinned as you watched him walk back into his dark room, but before he had shut the door and went back to his business, he turned around and looked at you; "You know I do love you, right, kid?"

You smiled and nodded, "I know. Same goes to you, senior."

He smiled small and looked like he was satisfied with your answer; "Are you going out tonight?"

You nodded, "I'll be back before midnight probably."

He paused, looking as if he was in deep thought. It felt awkward as you stared at his deep face, "You okay with that?" you questioned slowly.

He popped his head back up and nodded quickly, "Have a good time and tell Billie to treat you good or I'll haunt him," he weakly smiled.

You laughed lightly, "Whatever that means, but okay, I'll let him know."

You walked back into your bedroom and brushed your hair quickly. It was already seven forty-five PM and you were waiting for Billie to show up at your door any minute. You decided to just leave Kyle's sweater on since it was getting cooler outside and it was just more comfy, especially on your time of the month when all your usual clothes feel tight when they're on your body.

It was when you were putting your hair up in a ponytail when you heard the car horn outside your window. You paused and then walked over to your open window and saw Billie's car and his head poking out the drivers side window. You couldn't help but laugh at the sight. He probably knew you were in your room because of the rooms light beaming out into the dark sky.

"Billie, I'll be down in a minute!" you called out to him and he nodded before sticking his head back in the car.

Nikki
We were going to see 'Ace Venture Pet Detective' that night. As you can see, Billie had a real fetish for Jim Carey movies as well as the rest of the Green Day three-some. I once considered questioning Billie on the Jim Carey subject to see if he had a bit of a man-crush on him. I dropped it though, but knowing Billie, he wouldn't mind dating a guy.

We were at the theater and the both of us grabbed our seats in the venue before the previews had began to start. There were about sixty people in the low-lit room. Theaters were always busy on Friday nights, so it was lucky for us that we actually found seats near the back of the place.

"Are you sure you didn't want popcorn or a drink or anything?" Billie asked as he set down his jacket by his feet.

I looked at him and shook my head, "I can't eat food while watching a movie," I explained, "It's like the food takes away my concentration and all I think about is how good the food is."

He stared at me for a few seconds before saying, "Thanks for the explanation."

I giggled and hit his shoulder lightly, causing him to break out in a smile, "But by all means, go get yourself some popcorn if you're thinking about it that much."

He rolled his eyes as he smiled and hit my arm lightly like I had done to his moments ago, "Thanks, but I think I'll live without having popcorn."

"No way! I did not think I would run into you guys here - at the movies - out of all places!"

I jumped at the obnoxious voice from the side of me, and I looked up to see a grinning face of Tre Cool.

No. God, please, no. Not tonight.

"What are you guys dong here?" said Tre, his face still grinning.

Both Billie and myself just looked at him, questionably. I could feel the tenseness coming from Billie. It was obvious that Tre showing up to the movies wasn't on Billie's plans.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Billie said tightly. He wasn't impressed. I just couldn't keep my eyes off Tre; I didn't want to look at Billie because of the negative vibes I was getting from him.

Tre shifted his eyes around the room until he placed them back on Billie's irritated face, "To see a movie? Duh?"

"Tre, you knew I wanted to be alone with Nikki tonight," said Billie, getting more aggravated.

Tre raised his eyebrows and shifted his eyes around the room again; by his expression, he was not sorry for what he was doing, "Yea, I recall you saying that, Bills-worth, but I do not recall you telling me you were going to see a mo--"

"'Hey, Tre, Nikki and me are going to see Ace Venturea tonight, so I'm taking the car.'" said Billie.

Tre's lips were twitching as he tried to keep a straight face, "Bills-worth--"

"Stop calling me that, shithead!" Billie said louder.

I was feeling very awkward. I didn't know whether to cut in on them or just stay listening and still. I was too scared to look at Billie. He was so close and so tensed, it felt hard to look, so I kept my eyes on Tre who looked more friendlier, even though I wish he didn't show up.

He let out a tiny smirk, "Okay, sweet heart, you never said what movie theater you were going too, silly!"

I could feel Billie making a fist on his armseat as he pursed his lips together, "There is only one movie theater in Berkeley," he whispered harshly.

Tre smiled, "Oh, but there is another theater in Oakland; you forget, Bills-worth--"

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!" Billie slammed his fist against the chair.

Tre, just stop intimidating him. Just stop.

"I got us some popcorn-- Hey! Billie and Nikki, no way!" said Mike as he came running to Tre's side.

Kill me now...

I could feel how irritated Billie was getting. I could tell he was getting mad to an extreme. Although I looked over at Mike and I knew he wasn't on the same page Tre was. Tre came to the movies for complete different reasons than why Mike came; he just came because Tre probably asked him to go.

Billie groaned, "Why did you guys come tonight out of all nights?"

"Wait; if Billie and Nikki were coming here anyway, why didn't we just get a ride off of them? It's way better than taking the stupid bus," Mike said, turning to Tre for some answers.

Tre turned to look at Billie and Mike repeatedly, trying to figure out who to answer or what to say, "I JUST WANTED TO SEE A MOVIE!" he whinnied like a little child.

The four of us put our eyes on the screen once the previews started playing for the new movies coming out during the next few months. Once the lights dimmed and the speakers roared with background music for the previews, Mike and Tre went to find seats. Neither Billie or I took another look at them.

I didn't know whether or not Billie was still angry or if he was starting to get over it. I figured as long as we didn't have to listen or see Tre during the movie, Billie would be fine.

I took a tiny glimpse at him; he was leaning his head in his hand and leaning towards the side. I placed my hand on the top of his hand that was resting on the arm rest beside me. When he looked at me, I gave his hand a little squeeze and a smile. After a few moments, he gave me a smile back and it told me he was feeling better with my reassurance.

His smile grew as he put his arm around me and brought me closer to his side. I felt reassured and better as well knowing that Billie wasn't feeling mad anymore over Tre. He kissed my cheek before the next preview started.

I had thought the worst was over, but I knew the little battle of the wits was not finished yet when a handful of popcorn got pitched at the back of our heads. At first, Billie and I looked at each other in question and then we both turned our heads.

Tre and Mike were sitting right behind us; Tre with a big grin on his face as he was munching on popcorn and Mike looking at the two of us, telling us with his expression that he had nothing to do with it.

Billie pursed his lips as he kept his eyes on Tre and asked very tensely, "What do you want?"

Tre shrugged, "It's just hard paying attention to the movie when the people in front are snuggling."

Billie let it slide and he slowly turned his head back to the screen; I did as well after Billie turned back and after Tre gave me a small smile when Billie looked away. I looked at Billie and noticed his eyes piercing into the screen. I decided just to leave it and wait until the end of the movie until I talked or touched Billie.

However, it wasn't even a minute later until another handful of popcorn came flying at our heads.

This time there was no restraining; Billie jolted up on his feet and turned to Tre, grabbing Tre's bag of popcorn and throwing it at his face, causing Tre to jolt up on his feet as well.

"WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU HERE, TRE?! IS IT TO MAKE SURE I DON'T TOUCH HER?!" Billie yelled at him, looking ready to pounce.

The whole theater turned to the back to look at the scene. I was embarrassed and awkward; I was stunned. At that moment, both Mike and I got up on our feet to try to put an end to the uprising fight.

"Billie, calm down," said Mike soothingly. It didn't look like his words registered with Billie.

"I CAME TO SEE THE MOVIE!" shouted Tre, brushing popcorn off his head and shoulders.

"NO! YOU CAME FOR OTHER REASONS! YOU CAME FOR HER!" he motioned to me, making me blush from embarrassment and look around the theater at the staring faces; "YOU CAME BECAUSE YOU'RE A DICK AND YOU WANT HER! GUESS WHAT, TRE; SHE'S WITH ME, NOT YOU! SHE DOESN'T WANT YOU!"

Tre looked down at his shoes for a few seconds; Billie's words hitting him hard. I bit my lip at the pained look on Tre's face. Billie was putting words in my mouth because I had never said to anyone that I didn't want Tre; to be honest, I did want him, but I wanted to stay with Billie.

Tre slowly looked back up, looking at me with sad eyes, he asked, "Really?"

I was in awe. I wanted to say yea, but I didn't want to lie and I didn't want to hurt him anymore. I looked from Billie and Tre, not knowing what to say. My heart was pounding and time stood still. I couldn't take looking into their shocked and upset eyes, I looked down at my shoes, guilty.

I could feel Billie staring at me. If he didn't know my feelings for Tre before, he knew them now just by my actions.

"Maybe Tre and me should just go..." said Mike, awkwardly.

I kept my eyes on my shoes as everyone else kept their eyes on me. Billie was hurt, I could feel it, and he was mad. Extremely mad. I looked up at him as he looked around the theater, ignoring the eyes from everyone who had gone to see the movie.

Billie turned back to Tre, "Do you love her?"

Why are you making this worse?

Tre looked at Billie with shock written all over his face, "What?"

"Do you love her?" he repeated.

Tre bit his lip, looking at me. We met eyes for a few seconds before he nodded at me, causing me to look down again at my shoes. I couldn't handle this.

I didn't see it coming or feel the urge building up in Billie; out of nowhere, Billie pounced on Tre, jumping over the back of his chair and landing on top of Tre.

"BILLIE!" I yelled, trying to make him stop punching Tre from my chair. I was ready to cry; I would have never chosen any of them if this is what would happen to them.

"Billie! Get off him!" Mike said more calmly as he pulled Billie off of Tre with force. "This will never solve anything."

Billie shrugged his body out of Mike's grip and walked hurriedly out of the theater, leaving all of us on the scene. I pursed my lips tightly, putting my arms around my middle, trying to keep myself secured before tears started pouring from my eyes.

Mike sighed, "I'm going to make sure he doesn't do anything stupid," he said before walking out of the theater to follow Billie.

There was a pause of silence as I kept in the same position; "Are you okay?" asked Tre, starring at my quivering body in concern.

I looked up at him and panicked at the sight of his bleeding nose, "Tre, you're nose is bleeding." He placed his hand over his nose and looked at me again. I sighed, grabbing onto his arm, "Come on, lets get you a tissue."

"Thanks," he weakly smiled, following behind me as I took him into the main lobby of the theater.

****

I was on my way from the long night. I had convinced Tre to let me walk home alone so I could get my thoughts together. Afteral, after all that, I didn't really want to be seen walking home with Tre, especially by Billie.

I was undecided on what to do next. I didn't know how this would have effected mine and Billie's relationship or mine and Tre's. I had a moment where I questioned if it would have been better if I just stayed away from them - moved away. I was nineteen and old enough to live out on my own. However, I had told myself I had to stay just to see where this piece of drama would take me.

I walked up my driveway to a house that was dark except for the bright light coming from the garage door. It was closed, but I had figured Kyle was in there and forgot to turn off the light.

I opened the garage door and almost collapsed by the sight I saw. My heart was racing, my knees were weak, my mind was spinning, my hair felt as if it was standing still thought racing at the same time, and my skin felt cold.

There he was, my brother, hanging by a rope attached to a wooden poll hanging from the ceiling and by his neck, his body swinging back and forth. He had killed himself.