Unshed Tears

Rolling out of bed, I shuffled my feet around, shaking off the cold that seemed to wrap around me. Pale yellow light filled the room as I pulled on a pair of fresh gray skinny jeans and a low v-neck blue and black striped shirt. Groggily, I smeared thick rings of black eye-liner around my tired hazel eyes, and then I checked my cell phone and my eyes nearly fell out of my head.

Amy had called twice and I had five text messages from Jace. Dealing with Amy first, I quickly hit the send button, counting slowly until she answered.

“Hey!” she said in a chipper morning voice.

Skipping over the polite formalities, I sat on my bed and sad, “Why’d you call earlier?”

“Oh,” Amy giggled, “I’m going to the mall with some other people. We wanted to know if you wanted to come.”

I got back on my feet, “Sure. Who else is going?” Hoping out of my room, I pulled on a pair of black and green socks before searching for shoes.
“Jace, Morgan, Kathy, Kathleen, and Tanner.”

Tanner, I racked my head trying to remember who he was. I was sure I had met him before; he hung around with us before the school day started. He was in my English class, or maybe it was history. As I yanked on my beat up converse, the front door swung open and Jill stormed in. Her heels clicked against the tile and her long hair swayed at her hips. Like a well programmed automaton, my thoughts flickered off so that I wouldn’t give anything away, all my emotions pulling towards the hatred I found in my cousin.

“I’ll see you soon,” I said to Amy. Standing up, I ran shaky hands through my hair and cracked my neck.

“Where are you going?” Jill asked as she reapplied a thick layer of pink gloss to her lips, admiring her image in the hallway mirror. She bounced her thick hair and puckered her lips, blowing a kiss to the reflection.

In a cold monotone I told her, “That’s none of your business.” The door was right in front of me, ready to help me escape, but why would Jill let me leave in peace?

“Yea it is,” she scoffed, glaring over her shoulder, her white face pinched together. “I’m older then you. I mean what if you were going off to do drugs; I couldn’t let you do that.”

Laughing, I pulled the door back. “You wouldn’t know.” The warm summer air wrapped around me, and sweeping me away from constant worry and my thoughts, I took in the summer freedom. Behind me the front door clicked shut, and with out thinking I flipped my phone into my hand. Jace had texted right after Amy’s had called, and for the same reason. Ignoring him, I slipped the phone back into my tight pocket and smiled.

Not five minuet after I walked out side, a dark blue van pulled into the long drive way. Amy waved her hand wildly from the passenger’s seat, and Kathy stuck her head out the back window, her dark hair thrown back in the wind. “Hey!” I said, sliding the car door open and jumping in.

“Hi!” Kathy said with a giant grin, her head still hanging out the window.

Amy turned around from her spot in the front seat, her dark hair toppled around her smooth island face and her light lips turned up in an excited smile. “So, Jace and Tanner are going to met us at the mall, in the food court, and Morgan is going to find us eventually.” Slowly, the car backed out, turning down the road. “We’re going to get Kathleen now,” she said, turning back around. There was a moment of silence, and then the small room filled up with soft music.

We got Kathleen and drove to the mall, the car filled with constant chatter and our crazy laughing. When the car pulled up to the doors, all four of us thanked Amy’s mom and pilled out.

“To the food court!” I yelled, raising my fist in the air and causing a new round of giggles.

Amy linked her arm through mine, and Kathy and Kathleen hooked themselves together. Inside the cool air-conditioning blasted down on us, and the plethora of aromas floated from the bustling food court. The four of us slid into a table, already tapping our fingers impatiently.

“What time did Jace say he was coming?” I asked, checking my phone for the umpteenth time.

Amy sighed, “He said he’d be here around one thirty. And Tanner said the same.” She rested her head on the table, red-brown hair fanning over the gray table top.

“Boys,” I grumbled, bopping my own head on the cool surface. We laughed and roamed the area with our eyes, hoping we wouldn’t have to sit much longer. My laughter was abruptly cut off as I nearly slipped from my chair, my phone ringing in my jean pocket. “Hello!” I yell over the ruckus.

“Where are you guys?” Jace mumbled.

I spun around in my seat, searching again. “Food court,” I said, my eyes picking out each head in the mob.

“Ok. Where?” he asked turning around so that his confused, tanned, face was clearly displayed.

Laughing, I pushed my chair back and climbed to my feet. “Just stay still,” I said, weaving through the lines of people. Bumping back and forth I skidded to a stop, my hair falling still over my face. “Hey,” I said, clicking my phone shut and poking his side.

“Hey!” he said wiggling away and glaring. I’d forgotten how cute he was, and now that we were just standing here I wanted to throw my arms around him and never let go.

With a quick smile I turned around, and over my shoulder I told her, “Come on. Fallow me.” There was no point in waiting for him to fallow, so, I slipped through the groups of people, my shoes squeaking on the filthy tile floor. When I slid back into my chair, there was a rush of air and then warmth as his arm brushed mine.

“Jace!” Amy piped, running around to tackle him in a hug.

Kathy smiled and waved, “Hey.”

“Hey Jace,” Kathleen said.

“Hey,” Jace said, hugging Amy back before leaning back in his seat. The sandy hair that used to hang around his bronze face was short and choppy sticking up this way and that, but his golden eyes where still bright and lively.

“What happened to your hair?” I asked suddenly, tilting my head and squinting at him.

Frowning, he ran his hands through his messy hair and pressed his lips into a flat line. “My mom got to it finally,” Jace frowned.

I opened my mouth to laugh, but no sound came. I sat there looking like an idiot, my lips parted slightly and my eyes lingering in a haze as I took in his figure. Dark hair like the colors of fall hung in his face, covering his forehead but not shading his eyes. His eyes were a glossy brown, soft and warm to look at, and his lips were a smooth pink that at the moment were twisting up into a confident smile. His build would be considered average, taller then me in height and not stick thin but not holding onto a load of weight. A lose black Hurly shirt hung over his chest, and a pair of plaid shorts hung loosely on his hips. He was average and stunning, amazing to my thoughts. He was such a sight that I found I had forgotten to breath.

Oddly enough I felt my own lips returning the smile and a rush of dry air rushed into my lungs, at the same time Amy yelled.

“Tanner!”

His head moved up and down in a nod, his hair bouncing lightly and his smile growing. In a manner of seconds Tanner had joined our table, his hands hanging limply in his pockets until Amy jumped on him. He swept back his shaggy hair with one hand and gave her a quick one armed hug with the other. Kathy and Kathleen both waved, and even Jace smiled at him. Then he walked around to the other girls and gave them hugs to, his smile never faltering.

“May this is Tanner. Tanner this is May,” Amy said as we all got to our feet.

I smiled at him, afraid my words wouldn’t come out. Thankfully his mouth seemed to be working just fine. “We’ve met before,” he said and pulled me into a one armed hug. “So where to first?” he asked, his arm still slung around me. His other arm went over Amy’s shoulders and our feet began to move, carrying us away from the obnoxious cafeteria and into the flow of mall walkers.

“We’re just going to wander,” Kathleen said happily.

The trip to the mall was long and hilarious, but my mind wasn’t there for long as we went in circles, moseying about. It bounced back and forth between the things we were looking at and sensation running over my arm and neck, wherever his fingers circled. It was odd, and at first it annoyed me, through me for a loop even. His hands were calloused but soft, running coyly over my shoulder and then running into the curve of my neck and tickling just below my jaw. It became comforting, comfortable, and I just went along with what ever he felt like doing. Tanner was quick though; every time some one would look over or seem too interested in us, his motions would stop and he would smile coolly, waiting until it all returned to normal. Joking, we moved in and out of two worlds; in one we were with a group of friends, but in the other it was just the two of us. Every so often I would sneak a look up, trying to catch sight of his face, and he always managed to look down, a smile spread over his light lips. I wanted to laugh; no, I wanted to giggle. For the most part, I would drop my eyes and watch my feet shuffle forwards, but more then once a shy smile pierced me, spreading my dry lips in an odd, giddy smile.
…………………………………..That Night....................................
Flopping back onto my bed I shielded my eyes from the bright yellow light. It was going on eleven thirty and I had just gotten back from a long night out. Half laughing, I rolled out of my bed and made a quick change into some baggy clothes. Then I flipped out the lights and crawled under my sheets, happy for the first time in a long while. Sleep settled over me quickly for once, and soon I was in a dream state.