Soul Salvation

For days the only thing running through Rania’s head was Brian. It was frustrating for her, not being able to figure out how he died, frustrating that he couldn’t remember anything beyond the small bit of memory that Brian had revealed to her. Rania wanted more than anything to be able to help Brian figure out such a pivotal part of his life. She wanted to help him figure out why his soul was being held captive here on earth.

The more Rania thought about it, the more she tried to formulate different ways that she could help Brian trigger a memory. But it was hard, considering she didn’t really have anything to go on. But then, one day, something came to her.

“Brian?” she called out from her bed, where she was reading a book. He materialized for her in the one space he liked to occupy – the swiveling computer chair.

“Hmm?” he asked, though this time he was sitting perfectly still, looking across the room and out the window.

“You remember how we discussed the possibility of you leaving the manor?”

“Yes,” Brian said, pulling his gaze away from the outside world, looking at Rania with both question and hope in his eyes.

“I was wondering if maybe we shouldn’t test the boundaries today. I think maybe we should go find your grave. I don’t know if it will help trigger anything at all, but it might be worth a shot.”

Brian sat there quietly for quite some time, thinking. Rania was certain that visiting his grave would be a monumental thing for him. Seeing his name engraved into a cold slab of rock would solidify the fact that he was dead, that he really had passed. After seeing the place where he was buried, there would be no room in Brian’s mind for even the smallest sliver of doubt in the truth.

After a few moments, Brian slowly nodded his head.

“We could do that. I don’t know where I’m buried, but the closest cemetery would be a good place to start. It’s where my parents’ plot is, and they may have put them there, since Michelle…” he trailed off, looking out the window again.

“Do you know exactly where your parents’ plot is?” Rania asked, putting her book down and getting to her feet. She grabbed the hoodie lying on her dresser, slipping it on as it had started growing chillier outside as summer fully faded away.

“Yes,” Brian answered, looking at Rania again. He watched her as she got ready, slowly standing himself. “You want to go right now?”

“Now is as good a time as any,” Rania shrugged, flashing Brian a smile of reassurance. She led him out of the room without another word shared between them, and down to the entrance hall. Her mother was seated on the couch watching the television.

“Hey mom, I’m going out for a walk,” Rania said with a wave, walking past her mother to the door, Brian following behind her, unnoticed.

“Okay, sweetie. Be back in time for dinner though,” Amrita said, and Rania nodded the affirmative. It was only a little after noon; they would have plenty of time to explore.

Opening he front door, Rania stepped outside. She turned around to look at Brian as he stood just inside the doorjamb. He looked nervous, wondering whether or not he’d even be able to leave the house. Taking a deep breath, Brian slowly stepped forward, his eyes closing tightly as he made his way outside. Feeling the hard stone of the front steps beneath his feet, Brian opened his eyes with a slow smile.

“How does it feel?” Rania asked, her smile matching his.

“I’m not sure. It’s normal, but it’s weird at the same time. I haven’t stepped foot outside in seven years. It feels good,” Brian said with a sigh as he and Rania began talking down the stone driveway.

As Rania didn’t know the way, Brian soon began leading her toward the cemetery where his parents’ burial plot was.

“What do we do if you’re not here?” Rania asked as she and Brian passed through the front gates of the cemetery.

“I guess find another cemetery,” Brian said with a shrug. “Though I wouldn’t even know where to begin looking if that is the case.”

But after only a few moments, the duo made their way to the plot Brian’s parents had saved for themselves. Brian knew it was theirs because the plot rested under the shade of a tall elm tree, and there next to the plot was a slate-gray stone.

Brian stopped dead in his tracks in front of the store. Rania came up next to him when she realized he’d found it. Together the two stood in silence, looking down at the lone grave with Brian’s name carved into the face. Many long minutes of silence followed them.

Finally Brian sighed.

“Is it weird that I don’t really feel anything? I mean, standing here, knowing I’m buried right here? I don’t really know what to feel. It just seems so surreal…so unbelievable…” he trailed off. Rania let out a small sort of a laugh.

“One of my best friends is a ghost. Trust me, I know how you feel,” she said, and Brian smiled but Rania could tell it was fuelled by a small sense of sadness.

“Can you remember anything? Being here, I mean?” Rania pressed, hoping for good news. Sadly, Brian shook his head.

“No. It’s still as fuzzy and dark as it was before.”

More silence passed between them, the only sound coming from the fall air rustling through the leaves of the elm overhead.

“Brian, would you ever want your soul to move on? To go beyond here?” Rania suddenly asked, the cogs in her mind running at top speed.

“I don’t really know, actually,” Brian answered quietly, his eyes never leaving his own headstone. “Being a ghost is so close to still being alive. And I don’t really know what comes after this. What if there really is nothing waiting on the other side? That scares me more than anything…”

Rania could see the fear and sadness in Brian’s eyes at the thought of finding out what came after life.

“If you want to cross over…and it’s entirely up to you… then I will help you. I will do everything in my power to help you move on.”

Brian weighted out the idea in his mind. While it was terrifying to think of moving beyond this world, the pain he felt from not being able to be with his living friends and family had gutted him for years. Maybe I was finally time to move on.

Looking over at Rania, Brian slowly nodded. And without another word, he turned from his grave and walked away.