Essential Hope

**Hey, so I got three comments and five messages about changing the POV: Four said to change it, two said to keep it 2nd POV, and two said they didn’t care. So, going off majority, I’m writing this chapter in 1st POV. If you like it, please tell me. If you don’t like it, TELL ME! I do listen to suggestions, and ifyou prefer I keep it 2nd POV then I will. Or, if you want me to write the rest of the chapters this way, then, I will.**

“Do you wanna get something to eat?” Harry asked.

“Yeah, I’m starving!” I exclaimed from behind them.

“Not really,” Ginny answered, smiling up at him. “I’m fine just walking around for now.”

I sighed angrily to myself; this wasn’t the first time I had been completely ignored by the ignorant pricks ahead of me. I trudged loyally along behind Harry, glaring down at the grass.

What’s the point of even being here? I wondered to myself as we headed farther and farther away from food. Harry wouldn’t notice if I left…

He and Ginny had been like this for the past hour: just those two walking around together like I didn’t even exist. My stomach churned from anger, and my heart actually ached. Watching how happy and carefree he was with Ginny made me realize he had never been that way with me.

I felt tears sting my eyes briefly, but I quickly replaced the sadness, humiliation and rejection with anger. I didn’t want to cry over him.

“Do you wanna go down to the lake?” Harry suggested to Ginny. Only to Ginny.

“Not really,” I said, but when Ginny nodded yes, we switched directions and headed down there anyway. Glaring at them, I asked,

“Do you want me to drown you in the lake?”

He didn’t notice.

“Harry, I’m cheating on you with Fred. I’m pregnant with his love child.”

Nothing.

“I’m a Death Eater. I’m best friends with You-Know-Who, and I have wild orgy’s with him, Lucius Malfoy and Draco every night.”

Zip.

“I’m secretly a lesbian with Hermione.”

Zilch.

“I’m gonna kill myself tonight, y’know, just cast Avada Kedavra on myself and be done with all this.”

Nada.

“Hey, Lover Boy,” I called out louder than I had been. He just laughed at something Ginny was saying. “I’m going back to the castle now…”

He didn’t even turn around.

Fine.

Who cared?

Not me.

Man, he would be in so much trouble when he got back to the castle. I wasn’t gonna give in to his half-assed apologies. Nope. I was gonna stay strong, angry, and in power.

By the time I reached the castle doors, I was already feeling guilty about leaving him.

I sat down at the Gryffindor table sadly, staring down at the peanut butter and jelly sandwich on the plate in front of me. I rested my chin in my hand and glared ahead of me.

“What’s a beautiful witch like you doing alone on a lovely Tuesday afternoon like this?”
Fred’s sudden voice made me jump from surprise, but I was so relieved he was here that I didn’t waste any time spinning around and hugging his waist.

“Woah, talk about a 360 attitude change,” Fred laughed, hugging me back. He plopped down on the bench and slid an arm around me, pulling me into a proper hug.

I wrapped my arms around him and held him tight. His arms were safe and warm, and even when Harry had hugged me, he had never hugged me like this. I had been so angry with Harry just moments earlier, but now that he and Ginny weren’t around, I didn’t have to be.

My eyes welled up, and I allowed a few tears to fall onto Fred’s shirt.

He realized I was crying at once, and he stood up, pulling me to my feet as well.

“Let’s go to the common room, okay?”

I sniffed and nodded, allowing him to lead me up the stairs, through the portrait hole and onto the couch. He sat down first, leaning against the arm of the couch; he opened his arms, and I didn’t resist. I dropped down onto his lap and curled up into his chest. He wrapped his arms around my slender frame and pulled me closer. He held me with one arm and then stroked my hair with the other hand.

“What did the prick do?” He asked softly.

“Him and Ginny… It’s like-like I’m not even there when she’s around.”

Fred nodded, and I continued.

“He told me he loved. And I guess I love him too. But he loves Ginny more, and I feel like… Just feel like I was being used because he couldn’t get her. And now that she’s free, he doesn’t want me anymore.”

“I’m sorry Kels,” Fred murmured, pressing his lips to my hair.

“He just used me, didn’t he?” I asked.

Fred sighed, but nodded.

“Probably, I mean, I’m sure he likes you Kelsey. Who wouldn’t? You’re beautiful. Really, you are. He’s just always loved Ginny. Even before you came around. And she loves him. They were just too thick-headed to admit that to each other.”

I felt my heart twist a little; if they wanted each other, so be it. I didn’t need Harry. Ginny could have him.

“Good. Then let them have each other,” I sniffed, feeling a few more tears escape down my cheeks.

Fred reached down and lifted my chin up gently, staring down at my eyes. He gave me a small, warm smile and said quietly,

“You can do so much better than him, Kelsey.”

I felt myself blush, and I looked down. I hugged Fred again, and sighed.

“Sorry… I shouldn’t be crying about this. It’s pointless.”

“No, it’s not. He hurt you and you’re upset. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

Fred gave me a tighter squeeze, and I hugged him back.

“Thanks Fred…”

“Anytime, love,” he said, grinning. I smiled, in spite of myself, and Fred asked,

“So… what are you gonna do with Harry?”

I sat up and sighed; I turned around on Fred’s lap so I was facing forward, and I leaned back onto his chest. He wrapped his arms around my waist and then rested his chin on my shoulder.

“I… well, I just need to let him have what he wants. If not… things will just get worse.”

“But you love him,” he reminded me.

“Yeah, I know, but not enough to put up with his obsession with Ginny. Plus, I’m a jealous girl, and I don’t want to end up snapping and killing him and Ginny.”

Fred laughed softly.

“When are you breaking up with him?”

“The second he gets his ass back in the common room,” I growled. Okay, so maybe I was alright with breaking up with him, but I still wasn’t happy about the way he had completely blown me off today.

Fred squeezed me a little tighter, and asked hopefully,

“So, you planning on staying single long?”

I smiled and said casually,

“Well, I don’t want to be, but the guy I want probably isn’t interested in me.”

“I wouldn’t bet on that,” he said quickly; I could feel him smiling to himself, and I had to fight off my laughter.

“Well, he seems preoccupied with another girl; tall, slender, beautiful. You know…”

“Hmm… I bet he likes you more. Tell me about him.”

“Well, he’s really tall, very muscular.”

Fred smiled wider.

“He’s got this brilliant red hair…”

Fred’s breathing got a little faster.

“And my god! His eyes… they’re the most amazing emerald green.”

Fred tightened his grip on me.

“Oh, and did I mention he’s a beater for the Quidditch team? He’s so… just amazing! The perfect guy for me.”

“Oh, really now?” he asked seductively.

“Oh yeah… The things I’d like to do to him!”

Fred pressed his lips to my ear and whispered,

“I bet he thinks you’re the most beautiful, amazing, drop dead gorgeous girl in the world… and I bet he’d let you do those things to him.”

“Mmm… Probably… but I mean, he’s going out with Angelina, and-“

“WHAT?!” Fred cried, leaping to his feet. I toppled to the ground. “You’re talking about George??”

I widened my eyes and looked at him innocently.

“Of course! Who else would I be talking about???”

Fred’s cheeks grew red, and he turned away. I couldn’t keep a serious face any longer.

I fell onto my back and began laughing hysterically.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” he demanded.

“You *laugh* you actually thought *gasp* that I… *laugh* George?”

Fred blushed even brighter and snapped,

“Oh shut it, Kelso!”

I climbed to my feet and tried to pull him into a hug, but he shoved me off.

“No, no way! You’ve lost you’re hugging privileges!”

“Awe, please?” I pouted, sticking out my lower lip and looking up at him with my eyes widened.

He glanced at me, and then turned his back on me.

“Fine, I’ll just go find another gorgeous red-head to hug. Where’s Ron?”

I walked past Fred to pretend to go up the stairs, but he grabbed my arm and pulled me back to him. He wrapped his arms around me, and held me close, looking down at me.

“You really meant me?” He asked softly. I smiled and wrapped my arms around him.

“Of course you git,” I teased. “Who else would I be talking about.”

Fred grinned and began to bend down towards me. I shook my head, and for a second, Fred looked shocked and hurt.

“Not yet. I’m technically still with Harry.”

“That prick better get up here fast, then,” Fred muttered, dropping back onto the couch. I smiled.

“That was amazing, Harry! All those mermaids were beautiful!”

I jumped slightly from the surprise of hearing Ginny’s voice. Fred grinned up at me and said,

“Alright, well I’ll let you two have your moment… I’ll meet you for dinner, okay?”

I rolled my eyes but said,

“Okay, deal.”

He skipped, literally skipped, up the stairs to the dorms. I laughed quietly as Harry and Ginny came into view. They were both beaming at one another, and though they weren’t holding hands, they were sure closer than friends should have been.

For a second, my stomach twisted in anger, and jealousy began to brew in my mind; that is, until Fred came into my mind. For some reason, thinking about the fact that Fred was waiting for me made me calm down. I sighed and settled my feelings.

Harry glanced up and his eyes widened momentarily. He stepped away from Ginny, who cleared her throat and looked away.

“Erm, I’m gonna go.. take a shower.. I’ll, uh, see you guys later!” She rushed past me and up the stairs in record time.

“Hey, Kels…” Harry said warily, smiling at you.

“Hey Harry,” I said calmly.

“Where’d you go?”

“I told you I was going back to the castle,” I said, a bit of acid leaking into my voice. Had he really not realized I had left? Harry swallowed anxiously.

“Oh, er, I uh… We missed you, we were gonna go and-“

“Stop, Harry,” I said softly, shaking my head. “Don’t lie, okay?”

“But I’m not-“

“Harry…”

Harry sighed, and said,

“I’m sorry Kelsey. It won’t happen again.”

I shook my head and dropped down on the couch. Harry walked around and sat beside me. He took my hand in his and I said,

“But it will. I know… I know you like Ginny more, Harry. When you’re with me, things are pretty great. But when you’re with Ginny, you’re just so happy. I know you don’t like me as much as her.”

“I love you, Kelsey-“

“But not more than Ginny. Don’t lie, please, Harry. Just… Please just be honest, okay?”
Harry swallowed and looked down, his face reddening.

“I… I guess I do like Ginny more.”

“I know,” I said calmly. “And that’s okay, I understand. But we can’t keep this relationship going if you love her more Harry. I love you, but it wont work.”

“I love you too,” he said softly, squeezing my hand. “And I never, ever meant to hurt you…”

“I understand,” I told him, squeezing back. “But I think it’s better if we just go our separate ways.”

“But we can still be friends, right?” He asked desperately, sitting up to look at me. I smiled and nodded.

“Just friends. That sounds good.”

Harry sighed and said,

“I’m sorry Kelsey. I really am.”

“It’s okay, Harry. And I’m sorry too. But things are better this way.”

He smiled, and then pulled me into a hug. I hugged him back. As we pulled away, he gave me a kiss on the cheek.

“You really are amazing, you know.”

I laughed, and said,

“Oh yeah, I know.”

“So… are you and Fred gonna get together now?”

I felt my cheeks flush red, and I asked quickly,

“Wh-what? Why do you-“

“Oh shush, Kels. It was so obvious he was after you. And I’m sure you’re not gonna deny Fred.”

I rolled my eyes.

“We’ll see.”

“We already have.”

“Oh shut it Harry,” I laughed, smiling at him. He smiled back, and I said,

“I’m gonna go tell Ginny we broke up. Maybe get her started in the right direction for you.”

“I guess I’m obligated to do the same with Fred, eh?”

“You bet,” I joked, standing up. I helped him to his feet, and we walked to the base of the staircase.

“Friends?” Harry asked, smiling.

“Friends.” I agreed, giving him one last hug. We both turned and headed up to the dorms.