Harder Than You Know

Gerard’s POV:

I stopped dead in my tracks. “Lyn-z?” I felt Nightmare get tense in my arms. All she said was shit. I knew this was going to be bad. I pulled Nightmare closer to me. “Lyn-z what are you doing here?” My throat burned with dryness. Nightmare was sheet white. I know that she is thinking I’m going back to Lyn-z but I am not. I finally have the girl I love in my life again and nothing will make me change that again. Lyn-z walked up and placed a kiss on my cheek. She was heading for my lips but I turned to face Nightmare. I gave Nightmare’s hand a gentle squeeze. I could see the color come back to her face instantly. She was getting mad at that kiss. I pulled her closer and Lyn-z said “Gerard we really need to talk. Alone!” I shook my head “No Lyn-z whatever you want to say you can say it in front of Nightmare. I have no secrets from her.” I leaned in and kissed my girlfriend to let her know it would be OK. Nightmare stood her ground and glared at my soon to be ex.
“Fine Gerard. I just wanted to tell you that I want you back. I can forgive you for slumming with a second rate bassist from a trailer trash band. Now get your stuff and let’s go.” Nightmares grip on my hand scared me a little and she spoke with pure venom in her voice “For one Lyn-z I can blow your ass away on bass with my arms tied behind my fucking back. For two, Gerard came to his senses and is back with me. I will fight for him this time. I have nothing to fucking lose this time. I can wait until you dump the kid on him and go back to your whore ass ways.” I saw my brother come in and wink at me and Nightmare. Mikey walked up to Lyn-z “Tell him now or I will.” I looked at my brother with one eyebrow raised in question. Mikey got a little louder “Tell him now Lyn-z! I will tell them now if you don’t.” Lyn-z shifted uncomfortable “Fine Mikey. Gerard, I was ne…I was never pregnant. I knew I was losing you so I lied ok.”
My mouth hit the floor. I was trembling from anger and didn’t even realize it. I wanted nothing more than to reach out and choke the life out of my soon to be ex. “What the fuck did you just say?” Lyn-z held her eyes on Nightmare “Well I thought I would take a page out of Nightmares book Gee. The last time you took me back your little Nightmare was going to tell you she was pregnant. I heard her telling Vengeance. That is why I made my move on you knowing how drunk you were.” Before my mind could form the words to ask what the hell she was talking about I heard Nightmare scream “Shut the fuck up that is none of your fucking business!” Mikey and I stared at Nightmare like what the fuck is she talking about? Nightmare had tears rolling down her face and turned and knocked the shit out of Lyn-z. I thought that Nightmare was going to kill Lyn-z right on the spot. I don’t think Lyn-z got more than three punches in for every ten Nightmare gave her. Mikey grabbed Lyn-z and I grabbed Nightmare. Max and Frank stood there with their mouths gaping open. Craig had a guilty look on his face and so did Vengeance. Mikey passed Lyn-z off to Max. “Here Max you fucked her you take care of her.” He came and rested his arms around mine that were still holding Nightmare back. I looked into her eyes “Sugar, what was she talking about?” Nightmare burst out in heavy tears and ran like hell away from all of us. Craig came up and said “Gerard go after her or I will. She really needs you now and she needs you to be very understanding.” I looked at his pained face and took off after Nightmare.
When I finally caught up to her she was standing at the front of the bus compound lost in her own world. She looked like she didn’t know what bus to go to. I wrapped my arms around her tiny waist. “Babe, what happened? I already called my attorney and the divorce is underway. Lyn-z faking a baby only helps me.” She looked like she was going to puke. I pulled her over to a nearby tree and pulled her down into my lap stroking her hair out of her face. “You can tell me anything Nightmare. I love you with all my heart and soul babe. Nothing Lyn-z says will ever change how I feel about you. I know you would never tell me you are pregnant unless you really…” my words trailed away. Nightmare looked deep in my eyes “I’m so sorry Gerard.” Was she telling me she was pregnant with my child? “Nightmare what happened? You didn’t have an abortion did you?” My heart was about to pound out of my chest. Please for the love of all things holy don’t let her tell me she did. Nightmare sobbed into my chest. Her own chest heaving with every breath she struggled for. “No Gee I did not have an abortion.” I felt some relief at her words. “Then what happened? Were you going to have my baby?” My heart was breaking. “Yes…after fighting with Lyn-z that day I had a miscarriage. I planned on telling you after the concert that night. I only found out the day before. I was a month and a half and I…” I crashed my lips onto hers. When I broke apart I felt my heart breaking not only for myself but for Nightmare. “Oh babe. I really did break you didn’t I? I am so fucking sorry. I swear I will do whatever I can to make this right for us both.” I felt my tears flowing with hers. She shuddered and held me tighter. “Gerard I’m sorry. Our baby didn’t live and I…It was my…” I grabbed her face in my hands “NO! It was not your fault! Don’t ever say that. If it was anyone’s fault it was mine. And I left you when you needed me the most. Oh God! Oh Nightmare! Oh God Baby! Oh God!” We fell to pieces in each other’s arms. I was the reason my baby was dead. If I hadn’t gotten drunk and messed with Lyn-z Nightmare and I would have a child.

Vengeance’s POV:

I wanted to slap what was left of the Maybelline off Lyn-z’s face. Poor Nightmare now she has to tell Gerard everything. I hope he handles this better than she did. Frank and Mikey walked up to me and Mikey said “Vengeance what the hell is going on?” I let a few tears fall from my eyes and Frank put his arms around me “It’s ok baby, you can tell us. If it is what we are thinking then it would be much easier for Gerard and Nightmare if you tell us.”
I told Frank and Mikey everything. They both cried with me. The three of us went in search of Gerard and Nightmare. There was no way Nightmare would be able to be on stage. When we found them they were in each other’s arms bawling their eyes out. Everyone from Escape the Fate except for Max walked up with Sunshine and Angel. Sunshine asked “What is that all about?” Craig told her they would talk about it later. Now I was really glad I told him about it. I didn’t think any of us wanted to talk about it at the moment. I looked at Mikey “How fast do you think you can learn our songs Mikey?” He smiled “Well by show time tonight if you are thinking what I’m thinking.” We all smiled. I took Mikey to the stage with me and started a crash course in Dysfunctional Family music and Frank called for a driver and car. Craig pulled out his cell phone and made the reservations.
That night Gerard and Nightmare were safely tucked into a suite at the Hilton Suites, Mikey was our stand in bass player and Craig had filled the girls and Max in on what happened to Nightmare. Mindless Self Indulgence was packed and headed out of town with a beat to hell Lyn-z they only showed up here to cause trouble anyway. They were only going to be with us for a few shows. Frank waited patiently at the side of the stage for our show to end. After I was done singing Craig took over and Frank walked back to the bus with me. He had a fire in the pit and lots of food waiting our arrival. “Vengeance I’m really sorry that you and Nightmare had to keep that horrible secret for so long. I wish I had been there for you.” He truly looked sad. “Frankie, it’s ok, you didn’t know. I just hope that Nightmare and Gerard are alright.” I sighed looking at the leaping flames of the fire. Frank pulled me into his lap “Gee called a while ago. They are alright. Very sad but even more in love now than ever. They just need some time and Mikey said he’s on it for as long as she needs. I think they should stay here and rediscover themselves.” I agreed. Mikey was doing a great job and who gives a fuck what anyone else had to say.
The show ended about an hour ago. Mikey was sitting with me and Frank stirring the fire embers and adding a new log when ETF and my girls came wondering over to us. Angel gave a weak sad smile “So, I uhm…Vengeance, maybe Nightmare needs a few more days or something.” I smiled at her “Craig told you all?” Sunshine kicked at a rock “Yeah! Why the hell didn’t you two tell us then? And how come Craig knew?” I cleared my throat “Well, Nightmare didn’t want anyone to know. She was ashamed and blamed herself. I told Craig because he needed to know why she was so broken and untrusting. I’m sorry we never confided in you all. I know now that I should have called Frank as soon as it happened. Then none of us would be going thru this shit now.” Frank placed a soft kiss on my neck “Vengeance, I will always be here for you and you can tell me anything. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you both.” Max walked up to Frank “Dude, I’m sorry. I think that maybe we should all call a truce. Vengeance, babe you are an amazing girl and I will always love you but I see you are with the one you should be with.” I stood up and hugged Max. “Thank you Max. I will always carry a piece of you with me always but you are right. I do belong with Frank.” Max even hugged Frank. Craig hugged me and added “Yeah, I love Nightmare a lot but I think Gerard loves her more and she loves him back the way it should be. I want us all to get along and be friends.” We all agreed and stayed by the fire singing random songs until the sun started to rise.