The Happiness I'm Fakin'

Things have been pretty quiet the past week. Jessica's been over here everyday. It's almost as if she's moved in. Oh well she can turn my room into a closet for all her crap once I've moved out. Well hopefully that'll be soon. I can't stand seeing her every morning in her robe. It almost looks like she's not wearing anything under it...disgusting. She knows the house is swarming with guys everyday but I guess she just loves that type of attention.

"Don't you guys have any grape syrup?" Her high pitch voice sounded.

I put the newspaper back down on the table to give her the strangest look. "This isn't iHop."

She gave me a mean ass look. "You could've just said no."

"No." I mimicked her.
I brought the news paper back up into my view and continued reading but I couldn't stop asking myself, "Who the hell dose she thinks she is?". The whole time she's been here, she's been demanding things. Like the other night she was whining because Bam was tired and wanted to go to sleep a little early. He ended up going to sleep anyway. I was glad to see him finally standing up for himself in the relationship, to be honest.

"Yo!" Dico greeted us, making his way into the kitchen. He stopped for a little bit and glanced at Jessica as she crossed her legs in front of him.

"Yo yo yiggidy yo." I replied.

He chuckled and directed his attention back on me. "Where's Bam? I gotta talk to him."

"I think he's still sleeping." I replied keeping my eyes on the paper.

"No he's right here." Bam yawned walking past Dico and up to the counter.

"Morning baby." Jessica piped up.

Bam ignored her and came straight up to me. "What's this?" He asked looking a little down.

I gave him a confused look until I saw what was in his hand. It was the card that the realtor gave me. "Three days ago, I found this apartment that I really liked-".

"So you just went off looking for a place without telling me?"

He looked hurt and it killed me inside but I couldn't keep living off of him any longer, it's just not right. I don't know why he cared so much. It's not like I'm running away or anything.

"Look. . .I have to go to work." I told him honestly.

"Wh- again!? You've been to work every freaking day Amber. . ." He said seeming a little angry.

"Why are you so angry?! Everything I do gets you angry! Maybe it's a good thing that I'm moving out." I got up, grabbed my bag and shoes and walked out the door.

When I was approaching my car I stopped by the door and cursed under my breath. Why was I letting this bitch get to me? She's making me lash out at Bam. I have to stop this. I should go back and apologize. . .I shouldn't have yelled at him like that.
I swiped my hand across my forehead and turned around to go back inside but I saw Bam heading out after me in his pajama pants and the fuzzy slippers I got him the day we stayed at The Mall of America.

I decided I'd wait for him to walk up here. When he got closer he looked really mad. For some reason I felt like I was gonna cry but I looked away for a second and I took a deep, easy, breath.

I spoke up before he could say a word.

"Bam I'm sorry..."

"...You're sorry?" He asked raising his eyebrows.

"Yeah- I really didn't mean to blow up at you like that. I've just been stressed out a bit lately. I didn't mean to take it out on you." I told him sincerely.

He just looked at me for a while. I saw his face ease up a bit. He seemed to be a bit more calmer from when he came outside. "It's okay." He sighed. "I just, I don't get why you wanna leave me."

I giggled at what he said. "Bam I'm not 'leaving' you."

He chuckled as he realized what it sounded like. "Then why move?"

I hid my pain with a smile again. "I can't live off of you my whole life. . ."

He smiled. "I don't mind."

I chuckled because I really didn't know how to reply.

"If it's because of the stunts and stuff the guys and I pull, I'll ease on them-" He spoke softly.

"No- Bam. It's not that. I swear. It's just. . .look, I'm grateful for everything you've done for me, really I am. You're the best friend I've ever had...and I don't tell you that enough," I said looking at my feet.

"Hey," He took my right hand in his causing me to look up at him. "-I love you." He said smiling sweetly.

I literally felt my heart pumping a million times faster.

"I-I love you to." I replied, my smile mirroring his.

"I...I respect you and your choice to move out on your own. I want you to know that. . ." He said looking away.

I knew he didn't mean it. Bam can't lie to me. "Well...I have to go."

"Yeah...I'm gonna go have a smoke anyway." He said pulling a cig outta his pocket.

I opened the driver's side door of my car and hopped in. " I really wish you wouldn't smoke."

"Well..." He thought for a second. "I wish you'd stop telling me that."

I laughed.

For some reason it felt like we kept starring in each others eyes for like...ever.

"I'll see you later." Bam broke the "trance" as he looked down at his feet that were planted on the floor.

"Yeah see yah." I said pulling in the door, closed.

He backed up a little and waved goodbye.

"Hey Becky." I greeted my boss as I entered the studio.

"Hey." She replied as she was looking through the appointment book.

"Did the new lenses come in?" I asked as I set my bag down on the counter.

"Not yet." She sighed. "When'd you order them?"'

"Last week, they should've came already." I frowned.

"Maybe they're runnin' a little late."

"Maybe. . .", I said pulling out my camera.

"Hey I wanna thank you again for working over time for Jessie, Amber." Becky thanked me.

"Oh, hey it's no problem, she deserves some time off with her baby. I kind of need this time away from home anyway." I said lugging my stuff to the back room.

"Oh? What's Bam been up to?" Becky yelled back at me.

"Hmm, he's been babysitting his girlfriend." I smiled devilishly to myself.

"Oh?" She chuckled. "Someone sounds jealous."

I furrowed my eyebrows as I walked out of the room. "Eh koo you?" I gave her a weird look. "How am I jealous?"

"Oh come on. You can't possibly tell me that you don't have feelings for Bam."

"He's my best friend! I have to like him." I walked over to my desk.

"Oh, yeah okay sure."

"You know, guys and girls can be friends without strings right?"

She laughed. "I'm not THAT old. And I personally always thought that Bam and you would make a cute couple. You know, you'd slap a lot of sense in him."

I felt my cheeks turn red as I fixed my name tag.

"Are you blushing!? Amber!"

"Shut up, I'm not."

"Uh huh. Point is, you need a good, compatible guy in your life and Bam needs someone who'll put up with his crap. I'm tellin' yah you two are perfect for each other."

"But I have Danny and he has her. "

"Oh my gawd you're still going out with that dumbass?"

"Becky-" I whined.

"What he's a total idiot. Why are you with him?"

I honestly didn't know how to answer that. Thankfully someone walked in interrupting our conversation.

"Hey."

"Speaking of satan himself." Becky whispered.

I glared at her a little.

"Hey..." I said back.

Jessica found Bam by the ramps. He was sitting there...alone, just the way he wanted to be at the moment, but of course Jessica wouldn't let that be. She decided to join him.

"So! What'd you wanna do today?" She continued to bother him.

"I. Don't. Know." He said taking out another stick from the pack and lit it up.

"Are you gonna sit out here the whole day!?" She whined.

"Look! I'm just tired okay."

"It's because of what happened this morning. I hate how she has you like this babe."

"Who? What'r you talking about? " Bam asked Jessica annoyed.

"Amber- She has no right to yell at you in your house in front of your girlfriend and your friends. Psh, she's living under your roof and she treats you like such crap. She has NO right."

"You don't know what you're talking about-"

She brought her hand over to his messy locks and twirled a strand with her tiny fingers. He watched her as she leaned closer and kissed his lips sweetly.

"I think it's good that she's moving out." She spoke slow. "I hate how she yells at you." She pecked his lips again.

Not far behind them, Dico listened in quietly. He couldn't believe what was happening before his eyes. He left without being noticed, completely neglecting what he had to speak with Bam about.