You Had Me Wishing We Were Something

"Eric, stop!"I laughed as he continued to tickle me. We were laying on his living room couch together watching That 70's Show. Well not really watching. More like goofing around with each other.

"I'm having to much fun watching you squirm around"He laughed as he continued to tickle me.

"No.Really.Stop"I said in between laughs. "Please"I laughed

"Fine, but only because you said please"

"Oh my god thank you."I laughed and kissed his cheek and he chuckled as he layed back down next to me and wrapped his arm around me.

"Confession time?"I asked softly as I looked into his eyes.

"What do you mean?"Eric asked confused. A little smile on his lips.

"I need to tell you something. You cant get mad or anything."I said as I sat up making his arm fall and Eric sat up too.

"Whats going on Aubs?"He asked softly as he took my hand in his

"Its about John"I said and looked away from him. I felt his grip tighten on my hand as soon as I said John.

"Go on"He said quietly.

"Ive slept with him. A few times"I said just as quietly. As soon as I finished my sentence, Eric let go of my hand,got up, and jumped off from the back of the couch so he didn't have to go around me.

"Eric"I said as I mimicked his actions and jogged to him as he was heading to the hallway that lead upstairs.

"I don't want to talk to you right now"He mumbled

"No, stop"I said grabbing his hand and attempted to pull him back.

"We haven't even slept together"He spat at me giving me an icy glare.

"Eric"I said as I gripped his hand to keep him from walking away from me

"You're no better then me."He said shaking his head

"What?"I squeaked

"You broke up with me because I simply made out with a girl, but its perfectly fine for you to have sex with my best friend!"He said fired up as he attempted to shake me off.

"No!"I screamed "I never cheated on you! I slept with him when we weren't dating!"

"When was the last time you slept with him?"Eric asked attempting to calm himself down

"Last night"I said quietly.

"Fuck you"Eric said grabbing his hand back from me with so much force I stumbled backwards.

"Eric"I said as tears were starting to form.

"Yesterday!?"He yelled "How could you?! Okay, so I get that you're in love with him, but seriously Aubrey?!"

"I don't love him!"I said as tears spilled over. No way in hell could I tell him that I did.

"Thats bullshit Aubrey"He said in the you're-so-pathetic voice.

"I love you Eric"I cried.

He rubbed his for head. "I don't know what to do. This is fucking ridiculous. Johns my fucking best friend. How could this happen?"It seemed like he was talking more to himself.

"I'm sorry"I said as I wiped my tears with the back of my hand as I stared at Eric.

"Why cant I be mad at you?"He asked softly and I bit my lower lip to calm myself. "I hate seeing you cry"He said softly.

He took a step towards me and then stopped. Contemplating on whether or not to forgive me. I just stood there shaking slightly as tears poured down my cheeks.

After a few seconds, he walked fully over to me and wrapped me in a hug. I hugged back immediately burying my face in his chest.

I felt him kiss the top of my head softly and then rest his head on it. "I'm sorry"he whispered

"No"I said as I pulled away. "Don't say you're sorry. I'm the sorry one. I just get carried away with John, but I vowed to never ever sleep with him again."

"Do you want to continue dating me?"He asked softly looking into my eyes

"Yes"I said instantly.

"I love you Aubrey. Johns my best friend. I cant take knowing you slept with him, before me especially. And more then once at that. But I don't want to lose you."He said resting his for head against mine.

"You wont"I said quietly. "Please don't say anything to John. I really don't want anything started. Especially since you're touring together. I cant handle it when people fight"

"You know I'd do anything for you.But things aren't going to be the same between me and John ever again"

"I'm sorry" I said softly

"Its fine"He said with a sigh " I knew what I was getting myself into when I asked you to be my girlfriend. But now, confession time is over, lets get back to our show"He said managing a small smile.

~~

"Hey John"I said softly as I buckled my seat belt

"Hey Aubs, how was school?"He asked as he started driving.

"The usual. Hows Amber?"

"Shes leaving town to be with her whole family for the funeral."He said keeping his eyes on the road

"Oh. Did you say goodbye to her since you leave in three days?"I asked as I was fidgeting with my hands again. God I thought I was past this stage.

"Yeah, I did. I just feel so bad. I mean I'm leaving her when shes in her most vulnerable state."

"Sensitive guys are cute"I said with a Little smile and looked out the window.

"Its funny how the little things you say make me smile. I cant help it. "He said with a gentle laugh.

"Thats funny. You do the same to me"I said with a little laugh. I was usually much happier when I was around him.

"Are you going to be with Halvo today?"

"Later. I wanna take a nap. I told him to come over around 6:30-7:00"

"Oh, okay"He sad softly.

"What are your plans for the day?"I asked

"Pack I guess"He said with a shrug.

"Oh fun"I said excited

"What?"He asked confused with a smile as he looked over at me

"I love packing. Its so much fun." I smiled

"You continue to surprise me"He chuckled.

"If you need help, ill gladly help out"

"Ill keep that in mind"he smiled.

~~

"No, don't take that"I laughed as I took one of his shirts out of his hand

"Why not?'he laughed

"Its an ugly shirt. I hate it. Matter of fact, you should burn it"I laughed.

"Hey!"He laughed.

"Take this one, I love this one"I said handing him another shirt. He just playfully shook his head and then put the shirt I picked out in his suitcase.

I was actually having a blast packing with John. I decided to not take a nap and just help him.

We were actually just listening to his stereo as we went through his closet, cracking jokes and laughing the whole time. I wish this was how me and John acted towards each other from the beginning. I liked it. But no, he had to be a jerk to me for more then half the time.

He decides to be nice to me when he's leaving.

"I think Ive packed my whole closet"John laughed. "I think I'm over packed"

"You can never be over packed. You never know when you have to change. I mean you can end up spilling something on yourself and need a completely new outfit. And besides, you're leaving for two months."

"I'm actually really excited"John said as we both leaned against his closet door facing each other.

"I'm happy for you" I smiled.

"Thanks Aubs" he smiled back

My phone started going off and I quickly slipped it out of my pocket and answered

"Hey Aubs, I'm running a little late. I'm be there in like 20 okay?"

"Oh, yeah, sure Eric" I looked at John and he was now looking down

"See ya soon. Love you"

"Love you too"I said and hung up.

"I forgot he was coming over"I said with a light laugh as I slipped my phone back into my pocket.

"Wait Eric's coming here?"John asked looking up at me

"Yeah"

"Aubrey"He sighed "I'm really not on good terms with him at the moment. Thats not a good idea"

"John"I said giving him the look

"I haven't talked to him since he cheated on you."He said softly.

"I should probably tell you something"I said looking away from him

"What is it?"

"I told Eric we've slept together"I said quietly.

"What!? Why would you do that?"John asked his eyes wide in shock

"I felt like I needed to be honest with him."I shrugged

"He got pissed didn't he?"

"Oh you have no idea. He got mad about me sleeping with you before him,and because you were his best friend. I thought we were going to break up"I said honestly.

"But you didn't"

"No"

"Aubrey. This isn't going to go good. Maybe ill leave or something"John mumbled.

"No, you guys are supposed to be friends. This is stupid, and Eric said he wont mention it. I feel bad for basically fucking up your guy's friendship"

"You didn't. Its whatever."he sighed "Wait, so you and Eric haven't slept together?"

"No. We were taking things slow."I said softly with a shrug

"He really loves you"John said, but it seemed like he was talking more to himself

"What?"I asked confused

"Halvo doesn't usually wait that long before he gets in a girls pants, you really are special to him"John said looking down.

"Thanks John?"I asked confused.

"Ive lost"He said simply

Before I could ask what he was talking about, Shane walked in

"John, can you take me to Sports world? I want to get some new baseball equipment for next season"Shane said standing in the doorway of Johns room

"Yeah, sure why not. Get your shoes on"

"Thanks"Shane said and walked out.

"Guess I gotta go"John said walking around me and out of his room, leaving me standing there.

I just shrugged and walked into the bathroom and then into my room.

I jumped on my bed and stared up at the ceiling.

Maybe my life wont be so complicating once John leaves and I'm living on campus. Maybe ill finally get over John.

I just want to loss hope already.