Glowsticks

“Hi.” I said shyly and waved awkwardly before looking at the setting sun, yet again. He laughed and gazed at me again.

“You don’t really know me, do you?” Jackson asked me amusedly. I shook my head and apologized quietly. The respectful side of me always took over. And here, with me, he looked like a lonely boy who really needed a hug.

“No, don’t apologize. It’s just.. weird.” I heard him mumble before he looked into the sunset as well. I then had time to marvel at his beauty. His blue eyes filled with flames, courtesy of the sun and his hair had a more luscious side as well. He looked beautiful with tattoos and all.

“Why?” I asked curiously. He looked at me and smirked again. He had his guard up again. I sighed at that, and looked at my hands. I felt his cold fingers lift up my chin, and we both locked our gazes. He searched for something in me. A proof that I was lying. That I would leave as well. I knew that look, I looked at him the same.

“You aren’t like them, are you?” He said, still looking into my eyes. That question almost got me uncomfortable. Every girl in my old town resented me for being different. They hated me, claiming “I got fixed up”. I didn’t even know what the hell that meant. I didn’t get ‘fixed up’. I think.

“No.” I said and stood up. I hurried to the front door, but arms snaked around me, grabbing my waist. I looked up at him and he looked broken again. I felt bad, like crying. I didn’t even know his story, but I shared his pain, as he shared mine.

“Uh, forgot this, Blushie.” He said making a sad attempt at sounding indifferent. I took my book from him, and watched his retreating frame. I ran up behind him, and he stopped as he heard the sound of my running.

I lifted up on the tips of my toes, and hugged his back. I put my head on his shoulders and he stiffened up. After hugging him more tightly, he loosened up and held my arms with his cold palms. That moment, right there, was worth more than a thousand words. I felt new, vulnerable and pained. I took his burden away from him for a while and it broke my back. I looked up, but he sat still.

“What was that for?” I heard his stunned whisper. His breath soon transformed itself into steam, into the cold and black night that surrounded us. The stars came out, giving him a perfect halo. The halo of a fallen angel.

I thought about my answer. I didn’t find any. And it scared me. I came here to be in charge, in charge of everything. And here he comes, making me feel vulnerable again. I don’t want to fall for him solely again. He won’t be mine. I can see that. I’d have to share him with the world. And these feelings, were taboo for me. I barely knew him!

“I-I don’t know.” I whispered back and ran into the night. ‘I don't know..’

This phrase haunted me for the rest of my run. It was true. I didn't know. Heck, I'm sure I'll never know what on Earth possessed me to do that then. But right then, right there I felt it. Like a lock that clicked into place.

I had started something that I wasn't sure I could finish. Or continue.