Back In Your Head

When I walked into my bedroom I noticed the lights were shut and only the lamp on the nightstand by the bed was the only shred of light that illuminated the room with a yellow-orange hue. I gently and quietly shut the door behind me and looked around, my eyes only landing on the figure on the bed that was on his side, back facing to me, and already changed into sleeping clothes.

I decided to get changed as well. Today wasn’t exactly ending on a good note. After, I had finished washing my face, brushing my teeth, and putting my hair up in a pony tail. I got into bed under the covers with Kennedy. Turning on my side to face his back I began to gently rub his back in soothing circles. I knew he wasn’t asleep. He was thinking. It made me feel bad because he only did that when he thinks he messed up on something big time when he really didn’t.

Then I slid my arm around his middle and pressed myself against his back. I kissed the side of his head and whispered to him.

“Kenny, don’t believe a word he told you tonight. He’s just jealous that his own daughter’s boyfriend has a better bond with her than he does.”

I moved back as he shifted to turn and face me. I moved the hair that was in his eyes to the side and to look in them.

“You don’t think I’m controlling do you?” He asked in the same volume that I gave him.

“No. The last thing I want is for you to think that you’re controlling. I know you’re only looking out for me.”

“I guess I do come off as treating you like a kid.”

“I am just a kid though.”

“No, you’re not.”

“I am. I’m a complete wreck without you. I didn’t grow up with a good relationship with my parents. I had no one to look up to. You’re all I really have to look up to, Kennedy.”

He put his hand on my waist and pulled me closer to him, burying his face in the crook of my neck. “I love you so much, baby.” He mumbled and I felt him place a kiss there.

“I love you too.” I said back and soon we drifted off to sleep in each other’s arms.

The next morning I woke up alone and to the sound of water running from the sink from the bathroom. I sat up and rubbed the sleep out of my eyes. I just sat there not really thinking and realizing when Kennedy had finished. He walked back in dressed up in jeans and a plain shirt.

“Good morning.” He said as he looked over to me with a smile. I smiled back and greeted him back. He walked over to the bed and sat down next to me. He reached over to grab my hands. “Thanks for telling me those things you said last night.”

“Kennedy it’s really nothing to get all worked up over.” I said reassuring him again. It wasn’t really a big deal as he was making it to be. He was acting as if he had something to make up for…

“It is though, Amy. I don’t want you to ever think that I want to be the dominant one in this relationship and I really don’t want your dad to think that. I just want him to know that I care about you a lot. I’m always going to be looking out for you.” He explained.

“I already told you. You’re not a controlling person and you don’t make me do things I don’t want to. I understand you’re looking out for me. We already went over this last night. If my dad can’t see that then he can never establish a relationship with me. I told him last night that you’re always going to be there and you’re not going anywhere.” I said squeezed his hands in mind lightly.

He smiled weakly and leaned in to kiss me. “I really want you to have a good relationship with your dad though.”

“Why do you care so much?” I said laughing a bit. “The man clearly just proved himself to you that he doesn’t like you and you still want to help him out?”

“He’s still your dad, Amy.”

“Biologically, yes.” I said saying the same thing to him when he used that excuse on me. Biologically, yes he is my father, but I wouldn’t really call him a real one if he didn’t learn to accept my ways.

“Whatever, we still have a couple of days left here anyways. There still is some time.”

“Sure, whatever you say Kennedy. Because a little over a week is going to be enough for him to gain my trust.”

“It may. It didn’t that long for me.” He said shrugging.

“You’re different.” I said.

“Oh really?”

“Yes, now tell me why are you dressed up? I don’t think we planned anything for today.”

“Oh, right! That reminds me, you need to get dressed too.” He said standing up and walking over to his bags.

“Why?” I asked curiously and looking at him with a confused expression written all over my face.

“Because we’re going out today.”

“We are?”

“Yes, now hurry up. Can’t waste any more time.”

“What are we doing?” I asked getting out of bed to stretch. I put my hands on my hips and looked over at him.

“We’re going to go swimming.” He said holding up his swimming trunks.

My eyes widened when he replied with that answer and fear was sprawled all over me.