Back In Your Head

I stood there for a few seconds trying to process what Kennedy just told me. We were going swimming. Swimming. He of all people should know that I was deathly afraid of large bodies of water. I felt my legs give out and I plopped a seat on my bed. Luckily it was next to me or else I might have just fallen to the hard ground. I turned my head to Kennedy’s direction, who still had his swimming suit in his hands, and opened my mouth to speak.

“Kennedy…” I choked out and then tried thinking of what to tell him without getting upset with him. “You of all people should know that I cannot, for the life of me,” and I stressed out that last part, “swim. So, why on earth did you just say that?” I told him calmly. Inside I was feeling a mix of horror, disappointment, and anger. I was terrified. I almost died the last time I was in a body of water other than a bathtub. Disappointed and angry because like I’ve said he should know this known fact about me. It was a topic that did not like to talk about. Also, because now a certain someone would just pop into my head.

He set his swimming suit on top of his suitcase and walked over to me. “I know you can’t swim. I didn’t forget.” He said taking a seat next to me. “I also know you don’t like to talk about anything relating to swimming or being around large bodies of water.”

“Then why are you even bringing this up?“ I said kind of with an attitude. He wasn’t helping himself at all at this moment.

He ignored my attitude and responded. “I just wanted to try and help you get over your fear and maybe even teach you to swim.” He said kind of sheepishly and looked at his hands in his lap.

My face softened and my previous feelings washed away. I should have expected something like this. Kennedy wouldn’t do anything I wouldn’t want to. I was amazed though. He wanted me to get over my biggest fear.

I reached over and grabbed one of his hands to lace with mine. He looked up at me and I just gave him a reassuring smile.

“I really appreciate that, Kennedy. I didn’t mean to get all moody. You know I just hate talking about this because of what happened when I was a kid.” I apologized and explained.

“It’s okay. If you don’t want to go then we don’t have to. We can do something else instead.” He said smiling lightly back at me.

We just sat there holding each others hand and in silence. Though, I was thinking of what else we could do today that wasn’t repeated or boring. I decided I wanted to do something that wasn’t predictable or routinely. I sighed in defeat and gave in

“We might as well go out.”

“To where?” He asked already forgetting.

“To the lake.”

“You mean…”

“Yeah, teach me how to swim Kennedy.” I said confirming it.

“Are you sure?”

“I’m positive.”

By the time we got to the part behind the woods where the lake was located, the very lake that I had grown a phobia of years ago, I stopped in my tracks. Kennedy had continued, but he realized I had stopped. He looked back with his eyes squinted in confusion and the brightness of the sunshine.

“What’s up?” He asked with a smile.

“I think I changed my mind…” I said unsure.

He walked back over to me and put his hands on my shoulder. “It's alright. Come on.” He told me and started walking back thinking I was following.

“I don’t have a swim suit!” I blurted out loud.

He came to a halt and then turned around at my words. “Come again?”

“I don’t have a swim suit.” I stated.

“You’re kidding right?”

I shook my head. “No. I’ve never owned one.” It’s true I had never owned a pair. I never wanted to get one and I thought I never would.

“Well then what in the world were you packing into your bag?” He asked pointing to my tote bag.

“Nothing really.” I said. There was just about everything I could do by this lake in that bag besides a swim suit.

“You’re telling you packed nothing?”

“No. I mean I have my sunglasses and sun block and my iPod and my cell phone and…some spare clothes.” I said looking into my bag and naming the contents of it.

“Oh my God, Amy.” He said shaking his head.

“I guess we can’t go swimming then, huh?” I said trying to change his mind.

“Oh we’re going swimming.” He said with a hint of determination in his voice as he removed his shirt over his head.

I dropped my bag and as well as my jaw. “What? I just told you I had nothing to wear to swim.”

“That’s fine with me.” He said smirking and walking over to me.

“Kennedy.” I said un-amused.

He chuckled and said: “I’m just kidding. You can just swim in your bra and underwear.” He took the hem of my shirt and started lifting it up. I brought my hands up to his stopping his from rising my shirt up even more.

“I-I really don’t know, Kennedy.” I said kind of scared. He realized I was just scared now again.

“I won’t let anything happen to you.” He said leaning in and kissing me sweetly. “I promise.” He added after pulling his lips away from mine. I opened my eyes and stared into his for a few seconds, feeling protected, then nodded. My hands fell off of his and his continued to rise until my shirt was up over my head and fell next to the bag.

After my bottoms came off and my hair tied back up, Kennedy stood in the lake the water up to his knees. I stood at the very edge contemplating when to get in.

“Come on.” He said offering his hands. “It’s only knee deep right now. I’m sure you can handle it.” I took his hands and stepped in. The water was cool and refreshing and it felt good against my skin. By the time I was standing right in front of Kennedy the water up to his knees was higher on my thighs since he was taller. “We’re gonna go in a bit deeper alright?” He took my hands and we walked a bit more until the water was up to his mid-stomach and up to my breast.

“This is too deep now.”

“No. It’s okay, just a little more.” He said and brought my hands up to wrap my arms around his neck. I held onto him and then I felt his hands grasp onto the back of my upper thighs and lift me up causing me to wrap my legs around him. Then he started walking backwards getting just about into the center of the lake. I buried my face in the crook of his neck until he told me to look up. I was so thankful that no one was here today. I probably looked like a wreck and humiliating that I didn’t know how to swim.

“See, we’re in the deepest end right now.” He said smiling at me, his chin hitting the water as he spoke. This time the water was up to his chin. Since I was being carried I had higher leverage.

“Don’t let go of me.” I said.

“I won’t.”

“Can we go back a bit up?”

“Sure. At least I got you in this far.” He said and started walking up. By the time the water had reached our mid-sections once more we stopped there. My legs were still wrapped around him and arms still around his neck also. “Get your hair wet.” He suggested.

“What?”

“Dip your head in the water.”

“Um…no.”

“Come on.”

“Kennedy.”

“Hold your breath…just do it.” I took a deep breath in and held it then I felt the water on my back as Kennedy dipped me in and soon it surrounded my whole body then as quick as it covered me the quick I resurfaced. “Not bad right.”

I shrugged and un wrapped my legs from his waist and stood on my own. Kennedy and I stayed in the water for a while just chasing each other around, of course he was quicker since he could swim his way to me while I just shamelessly walked, dunking, him attempting to teach me how to pedal and float which went somewhat alright, and occasionally shared a few kisses, then we felt like it was time to finally head back.

When we walked into the house Kennedy hugged me from behind after I set my things on the couch.

“See, that wasn’t so bad. You learned a few things.” He said and kissed my cheek.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” I said turning around in his grip.

“We should do that again sometime again.”

“Do what again?” My father butted in and coming into view.

Kennedy let go of me and instantly became tense beside me.

“Swimming.”

“Swimming? I thought you didn’t like to swim.”

“I don’t, but Kennedy is teaching me.”

“Really? You wouldn’t even let your mother or I teach you how to swim.”

“Well, I trust Kennedy.” I said and took Kennedy’s hand then made our way back to my room, not saying another word to my dad.

Friday night finally came around and that was the day that Garrett had arranged plans for all of us to meet up again at his house. Kennedy and I were in the living room with a drink and casually talking to Jared. Well it was more of Kennedy talking to Jared about guitars or whatever. I was just tuning in and out glad to not be stuck in my dad’s house.

“Amy, there is someone who has been dying to see you!” Garrett said aloud and walking over to me and in who walked behind him was his older brother Trey.

“Trey! Trey!” I yelled and walked over to him giving him a hug. I distinctly remembered Trey from my childhood. After I remembered Garrett that day I saw him at my mailbox thinking he was some punk looking through peoples mail, I remembered that Trey covered me and Garrett’s asses back when we were kids.

“Amy, how have you been? I’m so glad you’re back.” He asked after we let go of each other.

“I’m good. I’m just here for two weeks actually.”

“Aw, I thought you’d be back for sure. I missed you, but not so much of you and Garrett’s pranks.”

“I’m sorry, Trey.” I replied while Garrett just laughed probably reminiscing a childhood prank we had pulled on Trey.

“It’s cool. So, you’re with someone?” He asked noticing Kennedy looking directly at us.

“Oh yeah.” I said motioning for Kennedy to come over. “Kennedy, this is Garrett’s brother Trey. Trey, this is my boyfriend Kennedy.” They introduced each other with a handshake and made small talk.

It was probably twenty minutes later almost everyone I had met at the bonfire was here along with other people who I haven’t seen before yet, but were all crew and friends apparently, but Tim.

“What’s taking Tim so long?” Garrett whined.

“I don’t know. I don’t keep track of him.” Pat replied.

“Chill, he said he just parked and is here.” Jared said and then as if right on cue Tim walked in, but he wasn’t alone. I didn’t mean he came with a date or anything either, because I met his girlfriend and her twin sister the night of the bonfire and they got here before Tim. Tim brought someone else with him.

My breathing was starting to change and I was feeling weird. I couldn’t describe it. I wasn’t going to pass out. I at least tried not to. Everything was turning into a whole lie in front of me.

“Finally!” Almost everyone yelled at Tim.

“Hey, it’s not my fault somebody over here was taking his sweet ass time getting ready.” He brought the one person I thought I was so sure I had got rid of.

The tall and lanky boy laughed showing his perfect teeth behind his thin lips.

He brought John with him.