These Things Have Changed

“Excuse me I have to go vomit” I said bluntly out loud to Joe. He laughed as I quickly made my way out of the dressing room. Joe, Nick and Kevin had surprised Miley and I backstage at the show. Miley attacked Nick with her lips so I decided to leave before I truly cried. I was crouching in the hallway breathing deeply. I don’t know if it’s nerves because I’m performing live with the women I dance around to in my bedroom or if it’s because the guy I love is in there with Miley’s tongue down his throat. “Wow, those two can go a long time with no air.” I looked up and smiled weakly and then returned my gaze to the stain on the gray-carpeted floor. It was actually really filthy. “You okay?” She asked looking down at me. “Yea, just uh need some air you know.” I said breathing deeply. “Honey you do not have to lie to me.” I looked up confused. “What do you mean?” I asked the superstar. “Girl, I know how you feel. Now, my boy wasn’t Nick Jonas and the other girl wasn’t Miley Cyrus…but I’ve been exactly where you are now.” I laughed and stood up. “No, really I’m fine. I’m nervous about performing.” I said lying. I’m lying to Rihanna…..how many people can say that in there life time?

“Tell me the story, we have plenty of time.” She said to me. “Really, it’s nothing.” I said shaking my head. She just starred at me. I backed up till I hit the wall and slid down slowly. She followed suit. “It’s extremely long and emotional….I may cry.” I said laughing nervously. “I’m here for you. Just let it out.” She said smiling at me. “Okay well I was two years old when I fell in love with Nicholas Jonas…” I started. I sat there for an hour and told her everything. Dad dieing, Nick leaving and not talking for two years, Mom and Jerk, Mom’s death, going on tour, moving to my aunt’s, moving to the Jonas house, Nick cheating, James, eating disorders and abuse, then this whole mess with Mitchel and Miley and Nick. “Wow. You’ve been threw a lot of mess for a seventeen year old.” She said to me and I sighed. “Yea, sorry I know you probably didn’t really wanna hear any of that.” I said nervously laughing. “No, it’s healthy for people to vent and you probably needed that, living with those three boys and having to deal with cucumber and only having Nicole” I laughed when she used our codename for Miley. “It can be rough sometimes but they’re actually not bad….just Kevin can get way over protective, well all three of them can, and especially since James. Joe can make me so angry sometimes and then Nick, I just don’t even know where to start with him.” I said running my hand threw my long curly hair.

“Well Ally, if you ask me. I think you should come clean with Mitchel, well I mean just end it with him. It’s not right and you know. And if Nick keeps playing Miley AND you, then I think I’m going to have to talk to him.” She said and I laughed. “I don’t know Ri, I really like Mitchell I do. It’s just I love Nick, You know how everyone has that person? The one they love but know they can’t ever have? So then they settle with the next best thing and just pretend it’s better then the first.” I said to her. She laughed, “He told you that didn’t he?” She said. “Yea…how’d you know?” I asked confused. “That was just a complete guy thing to say. I know you don’t want to hear it but honey you’ve been threw way to much. He’s using both of you girls. I’d make him choose. He’ll choose you…I know he will. And if he doesn’t then I’ll beat him up with you.” She said causing me to laugh as she threw her arm around me. “Don’t tell anyone but I like you WAY more then Miley, She’s nice but fake. I can tell and I’m SO pissed I have to share my lines with her.” I laughed even harder as Rihanna made a face. “Well let’s get ready for the show we have like a half hour.” She said standing up. “Hey Ri” I said as she started walking towards the room we walked out of an hour and a half ago. “Yea?” She asked. “Thank you” I said and she smiled and hugged me. “You know Ally you’ve kind of been like a little sister to me here, and if you ever need advice on anything from music to boys, call me. I’m going to be you’re unofficial big sister okay?” She said and I laughed. “Okay sounds alright to me”

We walked in and all the other girls were basically ready. “There you two are! Let’s go!!” Said Jacob, the man who would be doing our make up and hair. “Here you go change!” He said throwing my clothes at me. I did what I was told and changed. I had on a sparkly black beater underneath the off the shoulder shirt that had the logo on it. Then I had on washed out jeans that were cut mid way to my knee and cuffed. I wore a belt to keep them up since I’m still a little smaller then a zero, I promise I’m eating people. My shoes were wedges with black ribbons that tied up around my ankle. When I got out Jacob just touched up my curls and make up and then left the room in a huff about divas. “Cute, I wish I got the cut off shoulders” Mariah said to me and I smiled while sitting down next to Rihanna. “So, nervous?” She asked and I laughed. “Nah.” “Here, you can have this.” She said giving me one of her back bracelets. “Think of it as a sister present” She said and I smiled at her. “Thanks.” I said and she hugged me. “So where did those Jonas boys go!?” Fergie said and I laughed. “Don’t ask me, I wasn’t the one here.” I said and she looked over to Miley. “In the audience.” Miley said smiling. “I’m glad I got a good luck.” I mumbled. “Hey don’t worry about it, you’ll do great.” Rihanna said and I smiled at her. “Oh I know,” I said causing her to laugh.

After a few group photos and some with just some of the girls were taken. I took a picture of Me and Rihanna and then uploaded it to Twitter with the caption, Sisters standing up to cancer together <3 “That’s so cute, I’m making it mine to.” She said once she saw it. I laughed and shoved the phone in my pocket. A few minutes later and we were all walking on stage together. The music started and we all sang the song we had rehearsed.

After we finished and accepted the applause we exited and all hugged and took more pictures. We all said our goodbyes and then left. I was in my bunk after the show texting Rihanna and Mitchel. Tell Mitchel yet? She asked and I typed back, About to. Pray for me :/ She sent back haha, Ally it’s for your own good. Things will work out. I hope she’s right. I dialed Mitchel’s number and waited for him to pick up. “Hey Al, how’d the show go?” I bit my lip. “Great. We got a lot of donations, but Mitchel Rihanna was talking with me and I kind of realized something.” He sighed on the other end and I just continued. “Look, I really like you Mitchel but I’m sorry I’m in love with Nick. And it’s not fair to you. I’m so sorry.” I said and then waited for him to yell. “I knew this was coming. Well we tried. I hope you and Nick are happy.” Then he hung up. I did it. I texted her. Wow that was fast…how’d he take it? I answered with, He said he knew it was coming, we tried, and then I hope you and Nick are happy…then hung up. She replied with Well at least you told him, he’ll calm down and everything will be fine. But I’m going to bed, night girl! I smiled and said a goodnight back.

I sighed as I threw my phone across the short space and it landed with a smack and then flopped down on the mattress. “You okay?” Nick whispered threw my curtain. “Yea, fine.” I said. He opened my curtain and hopped up and laid down next to me. “What’s going on?” He asked. “I broke up with Mitchel.” I said. “What? Why?” He asked. “Honesty Nick, you. It’s not fair to him that I’m in love with you and not him…” I heard him sigh. “How’s Miley?” I asked. “Well she doesn’t want me to talk to you anymore.” He said and I sat up. “What?” I whispered. “Yea, that was our agreement.” He said and I just starred at him. He agreed to not speak to me!? “Al?” He questioned. “You agreed to not speak to me?” I asked. “Well yea, it was that or break up with her.” He said and I punched him as hard as I could in the stomach. He let out a low moan of pain. “You actually agreed with that!?” I asked getting madder. “Well what was I supposed to do?” He asked breathing heavily. “CHOOSE ME!” I shouted as loud as I could. “Ally! Shut up!!” He whispered clamping his hand over my mouth. I ripped it off. “NO! I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU DID THAT!!” I shouted and shoved him away from me. “GET OUT OF MY BUNK RIGHT NOW!” I shouted and pushed him out. He landed on the ground with a loud thud. “What’s going on?” Kevin asked in a groggy voice. I jumped down and kicked Nick on the ground, not like broken ribs kick, but a kick that should bruise his upper thigh. I reached into his bunk and grabbed his pillow. I took it and started to hit him over and over again with it.

“Ally what are you doing!?” Joe asked noticing what is going on. “THIS LOW LIFE, JERK, ASSHOLE CHOSE MILEY OVER ME!!!!” I shouted and hit him with the pillow between each word. Miley opened up the back door. “What’s going on?” She asked yawning. “Miley I’d go back in there.” Kevin said turning her around and shutting the door as she protested. Nick grabbed the pillow so now we were playing tug-a-war with it. “LET GO!” I shouted trying to rip it from. I failed and he got it from me. “YOU CHOSE HER NICK! YOU HAD ONE SIMPLE CHOICE AND YOU MADE THE WRONG DECISION!!” I shouted at him. “What the hell is going on?” Nicole asked. “NOTHING. ALL OF YOU GO BACK TO BED!” I shouted at them and they all went back to their own bunk. I knew they didn’t really go to bed, hell I am screaming out here. “Ally I told you why I can’t be with you!” Nick said walking closer to me. “STOP THE BUS!” I shouted and the bus stopped and pulled off to the shoulder of the highway. I shoved my way threw the doors and Nick followed me out on to the busy highway.

“GET AWAY FROM ME!” I shouted towards him. “Ally, please!!” he said to me. He started walking closer to me, “Nick I’m warning you if you get any closer I swear I’ll punch you straight in the face!!” I shouted to him but not as loud. He stopped where he was and put up his hands. “Okay Ally please can we just talk about this?” He asked. I took a deep breath. He walked closer to me and I didn’t respond so he knew it was safe. “Okay, Ally what’s wrong?” He asked. “Nick. You chose Miley.” “No I didn’t” He said. I starred at him. “Nick you said you agreed not to speak to me!” I said. “Well yea but she’s leaving in two days, after that it’s just us again.” He said putting an arm around me. “No!” I said shoving him back. “It doesn’t matter! You still let her think she won!” I said. “What do you want me to do then Ally?” He asked getting angry. “PICK ME! NICHOLAS JONAS YOU HAVE TWO CHOICES. ME OR MILEY.” I shouted at him. “This is crazy, I’m not picking!” he shouted. “That isn’t an option! It’s either the girl you fell in love with fifteen years ago or the other girl.” I said and he ran both his hands threw his hair pulling it a bit. “Nick please.” I said. “I’m not picking.” He said and then turned to go back on the bus. I ran after him and shoved him from behind and then ran onto the bus.

“SHUT THE DOORS LET’S GO!” I shouted to Lars, “Miss Windle, Mr. Jonas isn’t on here.” “THAT’S THE POINT.” I shouted. “I’m sorry Ally, I can’t.” He said and I let out an aggravated yell and then went back to my bunk. Why couldn’t he just pick me!? There is no way in hell I’m sleeping above him. I stormed my way to the back and threw open the door. “What’s going on?” Miley asked with pure confusion. “GET OUT.” I shouted. She jus starred. “I’M SLEEPING IN HERE!!!!” I shouted even louder. I was getting close to tears. She stood up cautiously and then scampered out of the room. I turned and saw her go to Nick and then I slammed the door as his eyes connected with mine. “FAGGOT!” I shouted threw the door and then flopped down onto the pull out couch. I screamed one last time before crying.