I Can Taste The Failure On Your Lips

I sat at the picnic table waiting, I knew she’d be out here before long, and I knew that I had to talk to her about this. Yes, Kaite still loved Curtis, very dearly in fact, but I honestly had no one to talk to, other than her. I was hoping for the positive, that maybe she wouldn’t be so mad. But, she didn’t have anger issues, and I was basically repeating her mistakes. I stood up and went to leave, but as soon as I did that she came swaying her hips around the brick wall, pulling a cigarette out of its package, and sat down at the table opposite of me. Maybe, I should’ve just gone with my gut instinct, and told Tom.

No, that would’ve been a mistake as well, Tom would beat Oli. I guess that would’ve been better than a psycho sexaholic anger bitch beating the hell out me though, right? No, it wouldn’t. Oliver didn’t do anything wrong, this was my fault. I didn’t say no, I brought this on, not him. I deserved this. I’m sure a sane person would’ve just beat around the bush and found a way of not telling Kaite, but that just wasn’t me. I had to tell her. I had to talk to someone. I couldn’t have talked to Daniel, because well, if Daniel knew that I was having sex, he would beat me too. And besides, Daniel was locked up, again.

Kaite just sucked on her cancer stick, and blew smoke out of her nose and mouth. I picked at the wood of the table, trying to avoid her eyes, she knew something was up. “Kaite, I have been cheating on Curtis.” I said, and let out a huge whoosh of air afterwards, the anvil on my shoulders seemed to lift a bit.

Kaite though, seemed as if she froze. She didn’t even look like she was breathing. Her cigarette drop to the ground and she just stared at me, eyes as black as coal. This was a huge mistake, I would be shredded by the time she was finished with me. “With who?” She asked from behind her teeth. I could tell she was trying to keep her cool. Keyword trying, she wasn’t doing a very good job at it.

I sighed not wanting to say the real answer, though if I lied again, I would be in that much deeper in the grave I was digging myself. I could just make up a fake name, no, that’d be lying. “Oliver.” I said it as quiet as I could, but obviously she heard me, as her hands turned into fist and her knuckles went white. “I didn’t mean to though!” I tried to defend myself with a lie. “Well, I didn’t mean for it to go so far.” I didn’t, I thought that I was going to be a one time thing. You know, try it on for size?

Kaite didn’t seem to care, she just gritted her teeth. “I bet you didn’t tell him to stop either.”

She hit the table once with her fist before getting up and stomping back into the library. I knew that I had just made the biggest mistake in my entire life. I knew that I was stupid for telling her. I knew that something was going to go terribly wrong, I just didn’t know what. The thought of Kaite telling Curtis made my insides churn, and I found myself picking up my phone and dialing his number. Of course, he didn’t answer, he was probably sleeping. I tried again, and this time I left him a voicemail, telling him to call me as soon as he got it.

===

Anna didn’t know.
Only three people knew; Me, Oliver, Kaite.

So, when I was sitting on Anna’s bed, rocking back and forth with my phone clutched in my hand, worried sick that Kaite had already gotten to him, all Anna could do was sit next to me and rub my back and tell me that whatever was wrong was going to work itself out sooner or later. Why didn’t I just tell Anna? Oh, right because she likes to talk about private things when she’s drunk and there is a party tonight and I didn’t want her slipping up. Though, I had a feeling that it had already been slipped up to Curtis, and that’s why he wasn’t calling back.

Soon after a while of Anna going through multiple outfits, and asking me which ones looked best on her, my phone finally rang. I didn’t even let it get through the first ring, before answering it.

“Curtis!?” I shouted.

“Yeah, what’s wrong, dear?”

“How are you?” I asked, trying to sound as casual as I possibly could.

“I’m exhausted. I cant wait to see you tonigh’, yeh are goin’ aren’t yeh?” He asked.

“Of course I am.” The worry eased off and I put my hand to my forehead. I was so thankful.

“Good, wear somethin’ extra sexy.” He laughed.

“Only for you.” I said, before I heard him mumbling to someone in the background.

“’Ey, I ‘ave to go, I’ll see yeh tongih’.”

“Bye Curtis.” I replied.

I snapped my phone shut. Why I had to do this to him was beyond me. I was really thinking about quitting Oliver right now. How drug addict does that sound.

Anna raised her eyebrows at me. “Somethin’ extra sexy?”

“What?” I asked.

“Curtis talks so loud on the phone.” She laughed, before turning her to her closet. “So, yeh need something’ extra sexy, then?” Before I knew it she threw me dark green dress.

“Kaite, I can’t wear this. It’s not even sexy.” I said.

“Exactly, it’s beautiful. B’sides, Green is your color. Yeh’ll look great in it.”

I groaned. “I fucking hate green.”

Anna was right though, the dress did look great on me, and it fit like a glove. I obviously was something to look at when it came to dresses, because once again, everyone was staring at me when I walk through the front door of the very crammed house party. Anna had me by the hand, leading me through everyone, stopping and hugging some random people along the way, until we reached the den of the house. Matt Nicholls was there, with his arms wide open waiting for anna to jump in, which she did. Next to him was a small petite strawberry blonde girl, who was clutching Lee’s hand, and my heart just did a loop, it was practically the cutest thing I had ever seen. And beside Lee was Matt Kean, who was talking to Tom.

It was then that I saw them.
She was straddling his hips.
His hands were roaming all over her.
She was giggling.
He was moaning.
She was beautiful.
And he was mine.

Well, let me make that more clear, and not a lie.
He was supposed to be mine.

I felt a fire start up in my veins, and I just wanted to tear that girl’s head off.

Tom stood next to me and put a hand on my shoulder. “Why don’t yeh go find Curtis, eh?”
I whipped my head around to face him and sighed. He looked so much like his brother. “Whatever.”

I knew that he was only trying to help me, and get me to shake the jealousy I had, and go find my boyfriend. But, I was beyond caring at that point.

I decided to take Tom’s advice though, and I began searching the house looking for Curtis. He wasn’t in the living room, the kitchen, the back deck, the front yard, the back yard, the bathroom. He was nowhere to be found. I tried calling him, but it was no use since I couldn’t hear the music being blared through the speakers. I saw his car out front when Anna and I came in, and I would’ve thought that he would’ve been with his best friends, but he wasn’t. I hadn’t seen him at all.

That was when it hit me. More like, ran me over with a steel train.
That was when I started opening every single door in that house. Every closet, every pantry, every bedroom, until I found him.

Double whammy in one night.