Ashley
1/1
Kacey Donner sighed heavily as he slipped his work apron over his head. Another day of cleaning. As he tied the apron behind his back, he nudged his wristband, and hissed slowly. Damn. Cutting hurt.
He'd cut himself for the first time yesterday – or, well, the first three times. He had wondered what it would feel like. What pain would feel like. It hadn't hurt when he'd dragged the blade across his wrist, so he'd done it two more times. He'd watched in wonder as his own blood flowed over his skin, until he realized he should stop the bleeding. After the bleeding was staunched, he remembered there would be scars. He dug through his older brother's dresser – the rest of the family were at James's track meet – and found two black, athletic wristbands.
Now he was realizing that the pain came later. His wounds were barely healed, so they stung when they were dipped in water, or jostled, or anything resembling being touched.
He stared at the mop bucket. With another sigh, he picked up the mop and slapped it on the kitchen floor. Besides the manager, he was the only one in the building. The quiet seemed heavy, but the splashes and slaps he made with the mop seemed wrong somehow. He tried to mop quieter.
He thought about his family and wondered when they'd come home last night. Panic quickly obliterated his thoughts. What if they saw the blood? Had he left any behind? He reassured himself that everything was spotless; he replayed the scenes of himself cleaning in his head.
Eager to please, that's all he was. And his best wasn't damned good enough.
Shadows fall on yesterday
It's like time just slips away
I'm nothing
Darkness follows me
The dawn, it never shows its head
I'm left dying here instead
With nothing
A lock without a key
Just as he finished the floor, cooks and waiters began to file in. He watched as they tracked dirt all over his clean floor.
"Hey, Kacey."
Kacey looked up from the floor and into the eyes of one of the most beautiful women he'd ever seen. Ashley Davis. She was wearing a Henry's t-shirt, knee length denim shorts, and black converse, and his eyes lingered on her bare calves as she tied her waitressing apron around her waist.
"Hi," he said slowly. And he looked into her eyes
Like the brightest star you shine through
Her deep brown eyes seemed to glow, and her smile was the kindest he'd ever seen. He longed to run his hands through her thick, dark hair, and trail kisses along her slender, flawless neck.
Although he sometimes caught glimpses of her at school, they only ever got the chance to talk at Henry's – the restaurant where they worked.
Ashley, baby
You make me feel so alive
I've got purpose once again
Yeah, yeah
"How's life, hun?"
"Uh, fine, I guess. Good, yeah. How're you?"
"I'm great. Single and lovin' it!" She smiled over her shoulder as she swept out to the front. She'd dumped her boyfriend? That put Kacey in the best mood he'd been in all week.
Ashley, baby
You make me feel so alive
I've got purpose once again
Yeah, yeah
He was bussing a table – his fourteenth of the night – and looked up at Ashley. He hadn't been counting how many times he'd glanced her way, but he couldn't help but keep track of how often she was looking back. And this time she was. She flashed her stunning smile and her eyes twinkled. He gave a wave with his dishcloth and smiled back, then proceeded to lean on his hand. He gritted his teeth as the sting of his wrists bit at him. But the pain faded when he looked back to her. She turned, her long hair swinging behind her, and headed to the kitchen to place the order.
If looks could kill you'd be the one
That takes my world and makes me numb
I'm nothing
Without you I can't breathe
And as the sunlight burns the sky
I see through my obsessive eyes
I'm nothing
Without you I can't see
Their shift came to its slow spot and she leaned against the counter he was cleaning. They talked about work for a while, school for an even shorter while, then she moved on to her boyfriend. Well, ex-boyfriend.
They usually would chat when business slowed, and her boyfriend and been a common topic. Usually something in his stomach would burn when she talked about him, but tonight, there were butterflies in there instead. She was single!
Like the brightest star you shine through
As she spoke, he'd nod or laugh, sometimes cracking jokes. "You're such a good listener," she told him with a giggle after she'd finished her story. He smiled genuinely.
Ashley, baby
You make me feel so alive
I've got purpose once again
Yeah, yeah
"Hey, when do you get off again? Sorry, I should know by now…"
He shook his head and said "Eight."
"Oh. Um, you think you could hang around for an hour? I get off at nine…" she trailed off. It was the first time he'd seen her uncertain.
"Um, sure, yeah, I guess."
Customers entered the restaurant.
"Great!" She kissed him quickly on the cheek. "Meet me out back?" She hurried off to greet the new diners.
He stared into space as the place she'd kissed burned. Nine o'clock a voice in his head whispered. A vague thought of his family – Where would they be then? Was he supposed to be home? – entered his mind, but was pushed away by the words nine o'clock.
Ashley, baby
You make me feel so alive
I've got purpose once again
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah
He leaned against the back wall of the restaurant, fiddling with the wristbands. The back ally at night wasn't exactly the place Kacey was most comfortable.
"Hey, you don't usually wear those, do you?" He jumped, not having heard Ashley come up.
"I didn't mean to startle you," she said, chuckling. "But any particular reason for the wristbands?"
He looked into her eyes, lit by the moonlight, and the expression on her face seemed sincere in the light of the streetlamp. She was someone who would listen.
He slipped the wristbands off.
You're the strength I need to fight
She gasped. "It's nothing," he said. She held her hands over her mouth as she stared at his wrists.
"I just wanted to know what it felt like," he explained, not wanting her to get the wrong idea. "I didn't hurt until it started to heal. And I will most definitely not be doing it again…" He'd been staring at his wrists, somehow afraid to look at her. Then he felt her hand on his chin, tilting his head to look at her.
"You know you can talk to me right? If you need to?"
"I appreciate that," he whispered.
And then she kissed him.
You're the reason I still try
His heart soared and the wristbands hit the ground. He turned to her and placed his hands on her waist. Kissing her was nothing like he imagined. It was a thousand times better. It seemed his hands were meant to hold her hips, their lips meant to mesh. There was no way he would forget this…
I'm the moth and you're the light
Use these wings so I can fly
I can fly
"Kacey…" It was his name that left her lips, his arms around her. He reached up and buried a hand in her thick curls. His let his lips trail down her neck, kissing every inch he could reach. It was her breath in his ear, her fingernails that dug into his back through his t-shirt.
Ashley, baby
You make me feel so alive
I've got purpose once again
Yeah, yeah
Ashley, baby
You make me feel so alive
I've got purpose once again
Yeah, yeah
Ashley, baby
You make me feel so alive
I've got purpose once again
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah
He'd never wonder what physical pain felt like again.
I've got purpose once again
Love definitely felt better.
I've got purpose once again
He'd cut himself for the first time yesterday – or, well, the first three times. He had wondered what it would feel like. What pain would feel like. It hadn't hurt when he'd dragged the blade across his wrist, so he'd done it two more times. He'd watched in wonder as his own blood flowed over his skin, until he realized he should stop the bleeding. After the bleeding was staunched, he remembered there would be scars. He dug through his older brother's dresser – the rest of the family were at James's track meet – and found two black, athletic wristbands.
Now he was realizing that the pain came later. His wounds were barely healed, so they stung when they were dipped in water, or jostled, or anything resembling being touched.
He stared at the mop bucket. With another sigh, he picked up the mop and slapped it on the kitchen floor. Besides the manager, he was the only one in the building. The quiet seemed heavy, but the splashes and slaps he made with the mop seemed wrong somehow. He tried to mop quieter.
He thought about his family and wondered when they'd come home last night. Panic quickly obliterated his thoughts. What if they saw the blood? Had he left any behind? He reassured himself that everything was spotless; he replayed the scenes of himself cleaning in his head.
Eager to please, that's all he was. And his best wasn't damned good enough.
Shadows fall on yesterday
It's like time just slips away
I'm nothing
Darkness follows me
The dawn, it never shows its head
I'm left dying here instead
With nothing
A lock without a key
Just as he finished the floor, cooks and waiters began to file in. He watched as they tracked dirt all over his clean floor.
"Hey, Kacey."
Kacey looked up from the floor and into the eyes of one of the most beautiful women he'd ever seen. Ashley Davis. She was wearing a Henry's t-shirt, knee length denim shorts, and black converse, and his eyes lingered on her bare calves as she tied her waitressing apron around her waist.
"Hi," he said slowly. And he looked into her eyes
Like the brightest star you shine through
Her deep brown eyes seemed to glow, and her smile was the kindest he'd ever seen. He longed to run his hands through her thick, dark hair, and trail kisses along her slender, flawless neck.
Although he sometimes caught glimpses of her at school, they only ever got the chance to talk at Henry's – the restaurant where they worked.
Ashley, baby
You make me feel so alive
I've got purpose once again
Yeah, yeah
"How's life, hun?"
"Uh, fine, I guess. Good, yeah. How're you?"
"I'm great. Single and lovin' it!" She smiled over her shoulder as she swept out to the front. She'd dumped her boyfriend? That put Kacey in the best mood he'd been in all week.
Ashley, baby
You make me feel so alive
I've got purpose once again
Yeah, yeah
He was bussing a table – his fourteenth of the night – and looked up at Ashley. He hadn't been counting how many times he'd glanced her way, but he couldn't help but keep track of how often she was looking back. And this time she was. She flashed her stunning smile and her eyes twinkled. He gave a wave with his dishcloth and smiled back, then proceeded to lean on his hand. He gritted his teeth as the sting of his wrists bit at him. But the pain faded when he looked back to her. She turned, her long hair swinging behind her, and headed to the kitchen to place the order.
If looks could kill you'd be the one
That takes my world and makes me numb
I'm nothing
Without you I can't breathe
And as the sunlight burns the sky
I see through my obsessive eyes
I'm nothing
Without you I can't see
Their shift came to its slow spot and she leaned against the counter he was cleaning. They talked about work for a while, school for an even shorter while, then she moved on to her boyfriend. Well, ex-boyfriend.
They usually would chat when business slowed, and her boyfriend and been a common topic. Usually something in his stomach would burn when she talked about him, but tonight, there were butterflies in there instead. She was single!
Like the brightest star you shine through
As she spoke, he'd nod or laugh, sometimes cracking jokes. "You're such a good listener," she told him with a giggle after she'd finished her story. He smiled genuinely.
Ashley, baby
You make me feel so alive
I've got purpose once again
Yeah, yeah
"Hey, when do you get off again? Sorry, I should know by now…"
He shook his head and said "Eight."
"Oh. Um, you think you could hang around for an hour? I get off at nine…" she trailed off. It was the first time he'd seen her uncertain.
"Um, sure, yeah, I guess."
Customers entered the restaurant.
"Great!" She kissed him quickly on the cheek. "Meet me out back?" She hurried off to greet the new diners.
He stared into space as the place she'd kissed burned. Nine o'clock a voice in his head whispered. A vague thought of his family – Where would they be then? Was he supposed to be home? – entered his mind, but was pushed away by the words nine o'clock.
Ashley, baby
You make me feel so alive
I've got purpose once again
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah
He leaned against the back wall of the restaurant, fiddling with the wristbands. The back ally at night wasn't exactly the place Kacey was most comfortable.
"Hey, you don't usually wear those, do you?" He jumped, not having heard Ashley come up.
"I didn't mean to startle you," she said, chuckling. "But any particular reason for the wristbands?"
He looked into her eyes, lit by the moonlight, and the expression on her face seemed sincere in the light of the streetlamp. She was someone who would listen.
He slipped the wristbands off.
You're the strength I need to fight
She gasped. "It's nothing," he said. She held her hands over her mouth as she stared at his wrists.
"I just wanted to know what it felt like," he explained, not wanting her to get the wrong idea. "I didn't hurt until it started to heal. And I will most definitely not be doing it again…" He'd been staring at his wrists, somehow afraid to look at her. Then he felt her hand on his chin, tilting his head to look at her.
"You know you can talk to me right? If you need to?"
"I appreciate that," he whispered.
And then she kissed him.
You're the reason I still try
His heart soared and the wristbands hit the ground. He turned to her and placed his hands on her waist. Kissing her was nothing like he imagined. It was a thousand times better. It seemed his hands were meant to hold her hips, their lips meant to mesh. There was no way he would forget this…
I'm the moth and you're the light
Use these wings so I can fly
I can fly
"Kacey…" It was his name that left her lips, his arms around her. He reached up and buried a hand in her thick curls. His let his lips trail down her neck, kissing every inch he could reach. It was her breath in his ear, her fingernails that dug into his back through his t-shirt.
Ashley, baby
You make me feel so alive
I've got purpose once again
Yeah, yeah
Ashley, baby
You make me feel so alive
I've got purpose once again
Yeah, yeah
Ashley, baby
You make me feel so alive
I've got purpose once again
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah
He'd never wonder what physical pain felt like again.
I've got purpose once again
Love definitely felt better.
I've got purpose once again
♠ ♠ ♠
Okay. I think I coulda done better. But I like it ^_^.