Hooked

I woke in my bed feeling like absolute shit. I really don’t know why I do this to myself. I couldn’t even stop for Sierra. I knew in the end I was going to have to choose life or death. I would have to stop for myself. Until I wanted that for myself it wasn’t going to happen. I rolled over on my side and saw Steph looking at me coffee in her hand. She smiled slightly.

"Finally you’ve been sleeping for ages" she said as she handed me the coffee. I drank it too quickly and burned my tongue.

"Fuck" I said holding my tongue she giggled. "What’s so funny?"

"You are. I like you when you’re all normal." I looked at her wondering why she was here. Why she even bothered to care. "Oh right your probably wondering what I’m doing here, I’m your new roommate!!" she said excitedly and I couldn’t help but smile. "Also your new band member." gosh I forgot about that too.

"Cool" I replied and sipped the coffee slowly. She scrunched her face up and I wondered why so I asked. "Why are you making that face?"

"I’m thinking is all. You’re rather cute. If you didn’t look strung out all the time I bet you’d be a total hottie." she grabbed my arm looking at the faded scars from pricking myself with the needle time and time again. Then she kissed one of my scars. Her lips felt electric to my skin. It was the weirdest most loving thing I’ve ever encountered. I was totally confused enough to start babbling like an idiot. Pretty much panicking and I don’t even know why.

"I don’t do it anymore. I don’t do heroin. Just coke, I just sniff that’s all but I don’t shoot up anymore. Joe thinks I do, I feel bad that he cares but I don’t care enough about him to stop. I swear I really don’t do heroin anymore" I said confessing my sins to her as if she asked. She smiled as she always does and dropped my arm out of her hands.

"You’ll stop when you’re ready" was all she said then she got up and left my room. What the hell just happened here? I’m confused all over again. I decide to take a shower to try and clear my head. I’m not even paying attention as I walk into the bathroom. The shower is already running and I don’t see anyone in there so I hop in and began to scrub. Soon I heard the click of the bathroom door.

"I’m in here" I said putting conditioner in my hair. Then the shower door slid open and I tried my best to cover myself up and rinse out my eyes so I can see who was intruding on me. "What the...Steph what are you doing?"

"Nothing what are you doing?" she asked smiling at me towel around her body. I didn’t understand her question.

"I’m showering..."I answered her looking at her like she was crazy.

"Well then so am I" she replied dropping her towel. I turned away not wanting to look at her. I’m not a pervert or anything.

"Could you put your towel back on?"

"Why? I’m showering you can’t shower in a towel silly." she said as she pushed me over and got into the shower with me. This girl must me crazy.

"Do you realize that I’m naked?" I asked her panicking as I didn’t know what to do in the situation.

"Obviously you have to be naked to shower" she replied closing the door. "Just relax, I’ll get your back" she said grabbing the washcloth and rubbing my back with it. It felt good even though I was tense. I mean this was weird.

"You shouldn’t be in here" I said as she continued to rub my back.

"Are you going to kick me out?" she asked in a sad voice.

"No..." I said as her hands slid down to my ass. I jumped. "What are you doing?!"

"I’m washing you...could you turn around when you speak to me?" I turned around and tried to focus on looking at her in her eyes. It was really hard. "Someone’s happy" she stated as she looked down. I blushed immediately.

"Stop looking, it’s not my fault this doesn’t happen every day you know." I said and she laughed it made me smile. I was starting to relax.

"Kind of makes me hot" she says while smirking and coming closer to me. I back up to the wall as much as I can but I mean the shower is only so big. She closes me in and puts her hands on my chest. My hands are glued to my side. I don’t know what she’s doing but I’m not moving. Then she presses her body against mine and lets out a small moan which does turn me on. She doesn’t do anything else but hold me to her. I find myself wrapping my arms around her small body. Taking her all in. this was so intimate. Probably the most intimacy I’ve ever really had. I mean sex is sex. There’s nothing really special about it. This moment right here was special. We stayed like that for what seemed like forever. The water falling down our bodies seemed like some sort of euphoria for me.

There wasn’t coke, no music, no sierra no anything just me and her and I liked that very much.