You're Hiding All the Right Things

"Skyyyyylar. Wake up Sky. Wake up, Skylar. The movie’s over. Skyyyyyylar." I heard Jeremiah’s voice whispering in my ear.

My eyes slowly came open and my surroundings became more familiar. I realized the rising and falling pillow my head was on was Jeremiah’s shoulder.

I shot up off it and rubbed my eyes. "Sorry, I didn’t know I was that tired. I must’ve been annoying you sleeping on you like that." I said, yawning.

"It’s fine, really. Maika’s out cold on the floor, too. Wanna go into your room?" He asked quietly.

"Do you wanna sleep out here instead of on my floor? I can guarantee that the couch is more comfortable than my floor." I offered, not wanting to seem too obvious.

"I think I can handle the floor. Lets go." He said, turning off the TV and DVD player and going into my room.

I followed close behind, barely making it into my room without running into any walls. I fell onto my bed, closing my eyes, almost falling asleep instantly. "Night, Jeremiah." I managed to get out before I was out again.

"Best two out of three, come on, man!" I heard Jeremiah say from down the hall.

"Fine, but no more. Now you’re just bein’ a sore loser." Maika said. I could tell he was smiling.

"Psh, nuh uh. Lets go." Pause. "1, 2, 3, 4, I declare a thumb war!" They said in unison.

I yawned and stretched, checking the time: 8:30? Only? Holy shit. I rolled over and realized that I didn’t want to fall back asleep. I didn’t want to keep Jeremiah waiting too long to get to the fair. I heard no one else up, so Beau and Jared must still be sleeping. I sat up and rubbed my eyes.

"Haha! Yes! I finally beat you!" Jeremiah said.

"You so cheated." Maika said.

"Now who’s bein’ the sore loser?"

I smiled and shook my head, getting up and going into the living room. "You guys are so loud, you know that?"

"I can’t help it that we’re both quite the competitive people. When are we going to the fair?" Jeremiah asked.

"Probably not til later this morning. I wanna eat something, and we should probably wait til Beau and/or Jared get up to tell them where we’re going." I said.

"And if we wait, Beau and Jared will make us breakfast." Maika pointed out.

"Oh, that’s a good idea, then. They must be where you got your awesome skillz from." Jeremiah said, lightly punching my arm.

"Psh, I’m not that great." I said, looking at the floor, messing with my lip ring. I realized that it was a nervous habit of mine around Jeremiah. Hopefully he doesn’t notice.

He grabbed my shoulder, which made me look up at him. He smiled and laughed a little. "I don’t think anyone could make tacos as good as you can."

I blushed, smiling. "Shut up. I’m gonna go shower, so if Beau and Jared wake up, tell them to make enough for me."

"Okay." Jeremiah and Maika said in unison.

I ran into my room and searched through my drawers for something to wear. It had to be perfect, I didn’t want to look like shit today. I pulled out my dark blue, ripped, faded skinny jeans and my Owl City shirt. I smiled at my decision and closed my drawers, going into the shower.

I heard a knock on the door while I was conditioning my hair.

"What?" I asked.

"Can I borrow your brush? And do you have any hair gel?" I heard Jeremiah ask through the door.

"Yeah, in the cabinet above the sink." I answered.

I heard the door open and for some reason I got nervous, like I thought he was gonna open the shower curtain or something.

"Thanks." He said, closing the door again.

I laughed off the nervousness. "That was so stupid." I said to myself. I rinsed my hair and turned off the water. I dried off and got dressed, blow drying my hair. I got my straightener going as I put on my socks and shoes. "Jeremiah, I need my brush."

"Okay, coming.." He said, running up the hall, stopping at the door, holding in his laughter. "Nice poof."

I smiled sarcastically at him, taking my brush. "Thanks."

He pressed down on it and played with it a little bit.

I waved his hand away, laughing. "Stop iiiit!"

He laughed. "Hurry up, Beau has scrambled eggs and toast and stuff downstairs."

"‘Kay, I’ll try." I said. He turned to walk down the hallway and I turned back to look in the mirror, brushing my hair. When it was unruly like this, I looked like a dork. I ran my straightener through it, seeing steam rise from it, leaving it nice and soft.

When all my hair was tamed, I shook my head, my hair parting to the side automatically. I turned everything off and put everything away before going to the kitchen to grab me some eggs and toast.

"It’s about time you joined us. Did you really have to look pretty for this?" Beau said, smirking.

"Shush, we’re going to the fair today. I wanted to be ready early." I said, grabbing the last of the eggs and a piece of toast.

"Oh yeah, that’s right, that’s today. Are you bringing Karli along?" Jared asked.

"We broke up yesterday." I said nonchalantly.

"Oh, that’s sad. Why?"

"We both had our own issues, and I really wasn’t feeling anything between us anymore." I said.

"Sorry to hear that." Jeremiah chimed in.

"It’s whatever. I could tell we wouldn’t last, she didn’t have the right vibes." I explained.

"Do you have a crush on anyone else?" Maika asked.

I couldn’t help but blush. "Yeah, kinda." I looked at my plate, avoiding eye contact with anyone at the table.

"Does she go to your school?" Jeremiah asked, and I swear I sensed a slight bit of disappointment in his voice.

"No, ‘she’ doesn’t." I air quoted "she" in my mind. If only Jeremiah knew. Hopefully he’ll find out soon enough. I looked at him and I saw that slight disappointment in his face, too. I gave him subtle puppy eyes and smiled at him. He smiled back and there was hope in his eyes. Maybe this whole thing would actually work out. Maybe he does like me the way that I like him. That made me all happy and giddy on the inside.

"Well, we should probably get going so we don’t miss out on anything exciting." Jeremiah said, sounding eager to get out of the house. Did he have something planned?

"Alright, do you need any money for food?" Beau asked.

"Oh crap, I forgot about that." I said.

"Don’t worry, I got it covered." Jeremiah said.

"Oh, you don’t have to do that.." I said. "That would make me feel bad, and obligated to pay you back."

"You don’t have to pay me back or feel bad. I’m doing this ‘cause I want to, not ‘cause I feel obligated to do so. Lets go before you talk me out of it." He grabbed my arm and dragged me out of the house.

Once we were on the sidewalk walking to the fair, which was a couple blocks from my house, Jeremiah slid his hand into mine, our fingers lacing together.

I gasped a little to myself and looked at him. He smiled, and I just wanted to stop on the sidewalk and kiss him, just like in my dream, but I didn’t want to move anything too fast, and I wanted it to be a little more romantic for our first kiss. I looked away and bit my lip.

"You don’t have to be embarrassed." He said quietly.

I looked up at him, confused. "What are you talking about?"

"I’ve noticed that about you. Whenever you’re nervous or embarrassed, you tend to mess with your lip ring."

I blushed and bit my lip even harder. He did notice after all.

He ran into me and stopped, right under the shade of the tree. I looked at him, and he was still smiling. "Don’t be embarrassed. I think it’s cute."

I giggled and started walking again, not letting go of Jeremiah’s hand.

We made it to the fair; I texted Caleb and Thomas to tell them that we were here, and hopefully I wouldn’t see Karli anytime soon.

"So much for going with me, Skylar." I heard her voice behind us. I spoke too soon.

We turned around and saw her and two of her bitchy little friends.

"You never texted me, so I didn’t know when we were going, and I didn’t feel like waiting anymore." I explained, sounding like a total jackass, and I was okay with that.

She scoffed and looked down at my hand in Jeremiah’s. She let out a little laugh. "Oh, I knew it. I knew there was something else behind all this drama and shit. You’re not even into girls. I don’t even know how I didn’t see it before, it’s so obvious." She said. "I can’t believe you played me like that."

"Why do you think I broke up with you in the first place? I was tired of being something I wasn’t. I thought that I could change who I was as a person by going out with you, but that obviously didn’t work. And I thought it was better to do it now than later." I explained, feeling kind of ashamed of explaining all this around Jeremiah, even though we weren’t even together or anything.

"Nothing you just said changed the situation. What happened is what happened, no words can alter the past. Nothing can alter how disgusting I feel right now, and how ashamed of yourself you should feel right now." She walked off, her friends following close behind.

I felt tears coming to my eyes. I covered half of my face with my hand, feeling my lip quiver.

"Here, lets go sit down, Sky." Jeremiah said, leading me slowly to a picnic table in the shade.

"She’s right. I feel so ashamed for what I did. I shouldn’t have been such a dumbass for doing that to her. No one deserves to have that done to them. I’m such a horrible person.." I said, breaking down, hiding my face in my arms.

I felt Jeremiah rubbing my back and hugging me. "Don’t believe any of that shit that Karli was saying. She was just trying to make herself feel better, because she knows that she’s not good enough for you, gay or straight." He said softly.

"She’s gonna spread this all around school now.." I said, my voice muffled.

"So fuckin’ what. Who cares if everyone knows? Wouldn’t you want that off your shoulders and have people accept you for who you really are instead of who you’re not? You even said yourself that pretending wasn’t working. And, I’m not gonna lie, but everyone probably already thinks you’re gay."

I sniffled and laughed. "Yeah, I know. Beau and Jared don’t even know, isn’t that pathetic?"

"Of course not. Everyone’s afraid to tell their parents stuff like that.." He said, letting his hand fall on top of mine.

"But I should be able to tell them, of all people, ya know? For some reason, I have this weird feeling that they’re gonna like, shun me or something if they find out."

"That’s so fucking stupid, Skylar. You know they wouldn’t shun you or disown you or anything like that. That would be hypocritical."

"I know. I know."

"Hey guys, what’s going on? Are you okay, Skylar?" Caleb asked, sitting on the other side of me, Thomas across from me.

"Karli knows." Jeremiah said, and that’s all he had to say.

"Oh great." Caleb said, sighing.

I sniffled again, gaining my composure now. "But it’s whatever. I don’t care anymore if people know. That’s less people for me to tell and less people for me to keep secrets from."

"Are you gonna be okay?" Jeremiah asked quietly, getting close to me.

I nodded. "I’ll be fine. Give it ten minutes."

He laughed and hugged me to his side.

"Or less." I accidentally said out loud.

I felt his laugh on his chest. "Lets get up and move around."

"Yes, lets." Thomas said, getting up, followed by Caleb, Jeremiah, and I.

The day went by like a blur. I had a blast with all three guys, especially Jeremiah. We shared cotton candy because I can never finish a whole stick by myself and he "accidentally" squirted me with a water gun at one of the games.

Sooner than I expected it was almost dark outside and the fireworks were gonna start soon. I heard Caleb and Thomas rehearsing their plan to leave Jeremiah and I alone behind us, and it made me laugh a little. Hopefully Jeremiah couldn’t hear.