The Federation

“How should I act around him? I mean, not only am I meeting your father for the first time, I’m meeting a living, breathing rock legend!” Carter exclaimed nervously, pacing circles in the living room of my house and wringing his hands. I found his anxiety absolutely adorable. But I could understand exactly where he was coming from.

“Just be yourself,” I suggested, watching from the couch as my fiancé crossed back and forth in front of me. “My dad gets along well with people. And I’ve told him about you over the phone. He knows I love you, and you love me, and that’s all he really needs. So just be yourself.”

“What if he doesn’t like me?” Carter asked, turning to face me with a frown. He looked down at his fidgeting hands and quickly proceeded to shove them into his pockets.

I sighed and rose to my feet. I strode over to Carter and framed his face gently with my hands. Our eyes met, and I stretched up onto my toes to press a soft kiss to his lips.

“Listen, Carter, he’ll adore you. I know he will. Honestly, I’ve dated worse guys,” I assured him. Carter smiled weakly and we exchanged one last kiss before the sound of a vehicle pulling into the driveway pulled us apart.

I grabbed Carter’s hand and pulled him to the doorway. I opened the door in time to see my father climbing out of his car. His car was just like him: an antique from the 80’s. A very nice-looking antique from the 80’s, but an antique nonetheless. Dad smiled and stepped quickly towards us, opening his arms for a hug. I released Carter’s hand to oblige. Once we pulled away, I pivoted towards Carter.

“Daddy, this is Carter. Carter, this is Steven Tallarico, my father,” I said.

My father sized Carter up thoughtfully. He frowned, and Carter’s anxious smile disappeared like cake in front of a fat person. Then, slowly, Dad offered his hand for Carter to shake.

“Nice to meet you, Carter,” Dad said as he shook Carter’s hand.

“Likewise,” Carter agreed, his smile reappearing.

“We might as well step off my doorstep,” I suggested, stepping back to allow Carter and Dad to step through the door.

The three of us talked for a little while. Mostly, Dad caught up with all that had gone on during the tour. I’d kept him updated over the phone, but service wasn’t always good and I didn’t always have a lot of time to talk. After about an hour, my father stood up to leave. I stood to give him a hug.

“You telling him?” Dad whispered in my ear so Carter couldn’t hear.

“Yes, Daddy,” I answered before we pulled away. Dad smiled and pressed a kiss to my forehead. He shook Carter’s hand again and then escorted himself out of my home.

“That was easy,” Carter said. I smiled and sat down beside him, snuggling under his arm. I looked up at him innocently and Carter groaned. “I know that look. What do you want?”

“I’ve been...well, I’ve been keeping a secret from you, my dear,” I answered, slinging my legs across his lap. Carter looked questioningly at me, resting his hand gently on top of my knee.

“It’s okay, baby,” Carter assured me. “I don’t care that you’re a stripper by night and superhero by midnight. I’ll keep quiet if you keep the lap dances coming.”

“Shut up,” I snapped, slapping Carter on the chest. He smirked and rubbed his chest where I’d smacked him. “I’m being serious.”

“I’m sorry,” Carter apologized. “Please, go on.”

“I’m a member of an elite rockstar agency,” I continued carefully. “It’s called the Legion of Rockstars, and it’s quite a fabulous little place. Well, maybe not so little, but it’s amazing. Only rockstars are allowed to join, and usually a new recruit gets sent an acceptance letter. There’s a number to call in the letter, and the recruit calls that number and tells them whether he or she accepts or does not accept. If that recruit accepts, then they get taken to Legion Headquarters, trained for two months, and then inducted into the Legion. However, there’s another way to join, and that is if you’re invited by another agent...such as myself.”

“What exactly does this Legion do?” Carter asked with a thoughtful frown. He sounded interested, however.

“Well, Joan Jett—she’s one of the directors of the Legion; Ozzy is the male director—when I first arrived at the Legion told me that the Legion’s purpose is to preserve rock in the hearts and minds of the world’s people. Basically, we keep the pop clones from taking over,” I explained.

“So, do you just give up the whole rockstar, making records, going on tour gig, then?” Carter asked. He sounded worried at that. I knew he was dedicated to the music more than anything—except me, of course.

“No, of course not,” I answered hastily. “How they handle that is when your manager thinks it’s time to make a new record or go on tour, he or she can just contact Joan and you get to leave the Legion for a while to make the new record or go on tour. That’s how I got to go on tour.”

“Training?”

“Training is probably the worst part of the whole thing. You’re trained in combat, wielding a gun—even though all we use are stun guns—how to parachute, what to do in a torture situation...just a whole bunch of stuff that you’ll need to be an agent,” I answered. “But it’s so fun because you get to meet a whole lot of rockstars and make new friends. I love the Legion. It’s really a lot of fun, if you’re made for it.”

“Does the whole band have to join?”

“No,” I answered. “Amy is in the Legion, but the rest of Evanescence isn’t.”

“What about Avenged? Are any of them in it?”

“Of course they are,” I answered. “You think they’d turn down a chance for adventure? They’re all fabulous agents.”

“And what about you? Are you a good agent?” Carter asked curiously.

“One of the best,” I said proudly. “I thrived in the Legion. Joan will probably hark to you about all my achievements...if you want to go, I mean.”

“Of course I want to go!” Carter exclaimed. For the first time since I began this conversation, he looked genuinely excited. “It sounds like it’s a lot of fun. When can we go?”

“Well, before you even proposed I was asking Joan if I could introduce you to the Legion,” I said. “She finally got back with me—she said it’s quite alright for you to come and tour the Legion. She’s always excited to have new people interested in joining. I’ll schedule a visit sometime in the next two weeks, okay?”

“That sounds great,” Carter agreed.

That went well.