It's No Fun on the Sidelines

In the morning, my phone woke me up. I let out a groan as I rolled over, out of Todd’s arms, and grabbed my phone from the nightstand. It was a text from my favorite Aussie. He said that Katie was in the hospital and needed surgery. But she was fine. It was just a simple operation, no need to get all worried. A sigh escaped from me as I rolled back over to stare at Todd; my morning routine. But this morning, he was staring back.

“What are you thinking about?” he asked in an almost whisper as he put his arms back around me.

“Us,” I answered truthfully with an unsure smile.

Todd and I have talked about a certain ‘issue’, but I knew where he stood on it. My stance was completely different than that of his. We’ve been together for almost four years. I feel like we should further our relationship. But he never wanted to talk about it. I was thinking maybe, this was the morning when we should.

“What about us?” he asked as he reached for my hand that was resting on his chest.

“You won’t want to talk about it,” I said as I dropped my gaze from his bright brown eyes to our hands intertwined.

“Try me,” he insisted.

“I want to marry you,” I said bluntly.

His chest elevated quickly and then fell slowly, a sign that he sighed. Why can I never keep my big mouth shut? I wish I had never thought of any of this.

“Why?” he asked with his forehead wrinkled.

“Because I love you.” DUH!

“But what’s wrong with the way things are now?”

“You can’t tell me you’ve never thought about it,” I said, sitting up.

“Not really. I’m ok with you being my girlfriend. I don’t see why we have to put a different label on us.”

I couldn’t find anything to say. I was honestly lost for words. Four years and he’s only considered me his girlfriend and nothing more? Are you kidding me right now?

“Molly, I love you. Its just…” he trailed off and looked away.

“There’s nothing wrong with the way things are now,” I finished for him, knowing that’s what he was thinking.

“Pretty much.”

“I can’t believe you,” I said, pushing myself off the bed.

“Well, what the hell do you want from me, Molly?” he said a little loudly from frustration.

“Do you even know what the word marry means, Todd? It means that I want to start our own family. I want you to be mine forever. You’re everything to me. Why can’t you just be my everything forever? I thought you felt the same way… but apparently not,” I said and turned to leave the room.

He called after me a few times, but I didn’t stop. I was too upset to even look at him. I can’t remember the last time I was so pissed off at him. Sure, maybe I’m blowing it a little out of proportion. But he could at least say that he wanted to wait a little longer, but no. Things are just fine the way they are now.

Before he could even come down the stairs, I had my shoes and hoodie on with a Rockstar water and my truck keys in my hand. Just as I heard him hit the top step, I was out the door. All I needed was to be out of that house for a little bit… and see my buddy Katie. I figured I should be a good friend and see how she’s doing.

I actually smiled when I got into my truck. It started playing Story of the Year. I always listen to this band when I’m upset. Not only is this truck amazing,because it’s a Chevy, but it can read my mind. Once I got to the hospital, I seriously expected to see Bilko near or in Katie’s room. To my surprise, no one was in her room.

“Where’s everyone?” I asked as I slowly walked in, seeing her wide awake.

“Blake went to go get cleaned up and my parents… I think went to get some breakfast,” she said with a small smile as I sat in a chair beside her.

“So… we’re just accident prone aren’t we?” I teased.

“Mine wasn’t an accident though,” she said with her full smile.

“What happened?”

“My stomach just started hurting so bad. I don’t know what caused it.”

After that, a silence filled the room. I couldn’t really think of anything to talk about…other than Todd.

“Are you ok? You seem a little… not you,” she said, eyeing me funny.

“Todd and I had a little… disagreement. I feel bad for yelling at him now,” I replied truthfully.

“What? You’re telling me that you two actually have arguments?” she asked, acting all surprised.

“Is it really that shocking?”

“Yes. You two just seem so perfect for each other,” she cooed, causing both of us to laugh a little. “What happened?”

“You’re going to think I’m like this selfish person, but… I really want to marry him and he just doesn’t want to leave the boyfriend/girlfriend stage. It’s frustrating,” I said as I played with my Rockstar bottle.

“Well… I honestly don’t know what to tell you. Blake and I kind of aren’t that far in our relationship,” she smiled.

“Whatever. You two will probably get married before Todd and I do,” I smiled back. “Speaking of him, what’s your parents think of him?”

The look she gave me so gave it away.

“My mom like hates him. I’m not even kidding,” she said as her smile faded quicky.

“He’ll grow on her. I promise. Bilko has that way with people,” I tried reassuring her.

“I hope so. He’s my mate now,” she smiled.

“Aw, is it official?”

“Yeah… it just had to be declared in front of my parents though,” she said as she rolled her eyes.

“They’ll come around. Bilko’s just a sweetie,” I smiled again, causing her to too.

I stayed there for about an hour longer. Todd kept texting or trying to call me. I didn’t reply to him. This issue was too big to be resolved over a stupid text message. Once Katie’s family started to show up, I left. I had spent a good two hours with her. They could have some time before they left. But in the mean time, I guess I have some things to talk about with Todd.