I'm the Kind of Human Wreckage That You Love.

My alarm went off and began it’s dreadful early morning screech. I groaned and slammed my fist down on it to turn it off.

“Uuughh. Why is that thing so loud?!” Gerard complained, facing away from me.

“More importantly, why can’t I move?” I lifted my arm weakly realizing I was so sore, even my eyelids hurt.

Gerard turned to lay on his back. He turned his head towards me and smiled, “Because I’m good at what I do.”

I gave him a sarcastic laugh and threw my arm over at him to hit him. It landed somewhere near his neck.

“Ow! Don’t! You bit me there last night.”

“I did not!”

“You SO did! Look!”

He pointed below his ear and I flipped my head over to look. He was right, there was an apparent bite mark on his neck. I flopped my arm overs my eyes and smiled in embarrassment.

“We’re sick, you know? Normal people don’t do this! We need some serious help.” I was almost truly shocked at how ridiculous we got last night. All night.

“You don’t need help. I definitely don’t need help, you do me just fine.” He gave me a dirty look and propped himself up on one elbow.

“Shut up,” I looked up at him, “You still have paint on your face, you maniac.”

“Hey, you love my maniacal side.”

“Maybe.... maybe I do.” I admitted and then snapped my jaws at him, biting the air, then slid under the sheets, so just my eyes were showing.

“You love being told what to do.” He accused, grinning like a madman.

I nodded.

“You love when I pin you down.” He leaned in close to me.

I nodded.

“You love...” He started.

“I love you.”

“You love me.”

I nodded.

The tips of our noses were touching and he gave me an Eskimo kiss.

“Omigosh! It’s Saturday!” I exclaimed, giddily.

“No, it’s Friday, but close!” He warmly laughed at me.

“Ah, shit. That means I have to go to work. All over again!”

“I know it’s a bummer not being with me ALL DAY, but some people actually manage to do it.”

Giggling at him, I rolled over and slipped out of bed, Gerard’s hands nipping at me to stay.

“Noo-o-o! Come back! Just ten more minutes.”

“You’re the one who told me it was Friday, I would have stayed if I still thought it was Saturday!”

“Who said it was Friday?! It’s Saturday, baby. It’ll be Saturday for the rest of our lives.”

“Mmmm, that’s sounds good,” I bent over the bed again and crawled over to him, “You can do that for me?”

“I’ll do anything for you.”

I leaned in as if to kiss him, he opened his mouth but I pulled back. With a quick evil laugh I ran into the bathroom.

I heard him yell at me from behind the close door, “Fucking tease!”

“Takes one to know one, babe.” I said under my breath turning on the water.

After I changed and came out to the kitchen he had made coffee. I grabbed a cup and some kisses and flew out the door to work.

Late again to work, I was expecting the worst from Mike. I was usually very punctual, and being late killed me, but sometimes you do crazy things when you’re in love. You think Mike will buy it? No, me neither.

Walking down the hall to my office I hear voices from inside and my office door is ajar. Arriving, I push the door open, and am greeted by faces I hadn’t seen in person in years.

“Hey-ey! Look who’s here!” A guy sitting in my chair with his feet on my desk obnoxiously said.

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry. I tried to tell him to stop but-” Nat suddenly spilled out.

“No, no. It’s cool. Wow! Who the fuck are you guys?! We’ve all gotten so old!” I remarked recognizing the people scattered around my office.

The boys laughed and stood up to say some proper hellos.

“God damn! You got really hot!” Vasco Cesaretti told me. Lead guitar. We had gone to elementary, middle, and part of high school together. He had been a complete asshole most of the time, but he got better once you got to know him.

“I know right? I’m not fat anymore!” I said out of embarrassment with a laugh.

“Seriously.” Katy Tong said. Drummer. She’s always been very chill and calm, all the time. She’s really funny because she doesn’t take anything seriously and is very monotone.

I laughed again because Katy was stick thin, like her brother, and I had never felt so complimented.

“So, Katmandu, when do when get our checks?” Tim Tong asked me. Vocals. His sister, Katy, was my age, he was two years older. He was about 6’3” and really thin. He was the guy everyone called by both his first and last name. The comedian of the group.

“God, I’m twenty minutes late, and you’ve already told them ‘the story’.” I asked Natalie.

“Well what else was I supposed to do while I was waiting? I didn’t want to start without you. And you’re fifty minutes late.”

“Really?” I looked at the clock on the wall.

“It’s cool, boss, we can work with your schedule. I just hope you cut us as much slack as you cut yourself.” Julian Nicholson said. Bass. I’ve known him since Kindergarten, when he called his head his noodle, and in high school we hung out at lunch everyday. He’s the butt of everyone’s jokes. Always has been.

“Well, I like the ‘boss’ part of that statement, but everything after that you must of gone temporarily retarded-”

“Oh, no. He’s permanently retarded.” Tim confirmed.

“Right... cool. Well, I think the first thing we’ll need to do is find a practice space. Like right now... Actually, let me call Gerard and see if he’s practicing today. Hey, Nat, why don’t you show them his mural-collage-thingy?” I requested.

“Okay.” Nat replied, taking it out of a cardboard cylinder.

While I was listening to the phone ring, I could hear the band giving comments of awe and excitement over Gerard’s work.

“Hello?”

“Hey, babe, it’s me.”

“Hey. What’s up. Why aren’t you home? It’s Saturday, remember.”

“Haha, you’re funny, babe, but are you guys practicing today?”

“Yeah, I was just about to go actually. Why?”

“Really? Sweet, can Venetian Silicone join you guys for today? I want to hear ‘em and see ‘em. And I wanna see you guys.”

“I wanna see you. I wanna...”

He started listing all sorts of sinfully amazing activities he wanted to do when he saw me. I looked back at the band and Natalie covering the receiver in discomposure. Nat caught the look in my eye and walked over to me.

“Okay, awesome, babe. So what time?” I quickly spat out, shutting him up before Nat could hear. “12:30? We’re there. Bye. Love you.”

“Dude, who did this/ Did you do this?” Vasco questioned, not hiding his pleasure, losing his usual blase attitude.

“No, I didn’t do it, my b-... my um... a friend of mine did it.” I didn’t think I should tell them about Gerard just yet.

“Well, it’s fucking great.”

“Well, good. So are you guys up for a practice? You got your gear?”

“All packed up and ready to go, just like always.” Julian said.

We all hopped into their rent-a-van and headed into New York to meet My Chem at their space.

Frank and Gerard were outside smoking when we arrived. I hopped out first, eager to introduce everyone.

“Okay, this is Frank,” I motioned to Frank leaned against a wall, he raised his cigarette at them, “And this is Gerard.” He smiled and looked at me taking a drag, “Boys, this is Katy, Tim, Vasco, Julian, and Ryan (p.s. rhythm guitar). Cool, let’s go inside then.” I opened the door and let everyone walk in. Gerard came last and pulled me into a kiss. I tried to pull back but he grabbed my face.

“Hey! Save that for in front of your grandma! Please, we’re working here!” Tim said.

“Oh my God! Are they kissing in public again? I can’t believe you two sometimes. So rude!” Mikey complained, walking to the door and glaring at us from inside, sounding extremely innocent and immature.

Just to plague Mikey a little more Gerard kissed me once again and made it graphic and very... French.

“Ahhh! Not again?! Why do you do that?!” Mikey yelped, covering his eyes.

Gerard pulled back and entered the room, shoving past his brother, “Because you do that.”

I walked in past Mikey and he stepped back to avoid me. I stuck my tongue out at him.

“Ahhh! Now she’s doing it too! Make it stop!”

“Oh, Mikey, calm down. Come over here and play your damn bass.” Ray said jokingly.

“Ray! Everybody, this is Ray. The coolest and the nicest Italian in all of Jersey,” I motioned to Ray and he put his hand up in the air in a motionless salute, “And this is Otter or Matt, whatever you want to call him.” I pointed to him sitting behind his drums.

Venetian Silicone played, and they sounded great. Tim had an awesome leadership and command when in the “spotlight”. He had all of us cracking up between songs, just free-styling random verses.

“I like to rhyme,
I like my beats funky,
I'm spunky,
I like my oatmeal lumpy.
I'm sick wit dis,
straight gangsta mack,
but sometimes I get ridiculous
I'll eat up all your crackers and your licorice
hey yo fat girl, c'mere,
are ya ticklish?
Yeah, I called ya fat.
Look at me, I'm skinny.” Tim was rapping out, jumping around the stage.

“Never kept you from getting busy!” I yelled, adding to his rant.

“Yeah!,” He agreed with me then continued,
“I’m a freak,
I like the girls like BOOM!”

“You once got busy in a Burger King Bathroom!” Frankie reinforced.

“Oh my God! I love these guys!” Gerard told me, pulling me under his arm and messing up my hair.

“Haha! Good. I’m their boss, you might actually have to see them again.” I returned sarcastically.

Otter had brought drinks and after a couple songs we poured cocktails into red plastic cups. Then things got really fun.