Lonely

The next day, I was walking to school again. I was late, I ran, and I got in just in time. I didn’t see Alex anywhere. He was completely gone.
The class went by as usual. I didn’t answer any questions. The teacher didn’t ask me any.
I went outside again, I brought my food. I never bought anything at the store; it felt even worse to be a loner there. I went over to my bench, looking around me. Would he come? Had he realized how lame I was, and found himself better friends? I mentally hit myself. He was never my friend. All we had ever done was shake hands and sit next to each other. I didn’t hope he was coming. I didn’t feel any disappointment in his absence.
Or maybe he was sick. Surely, he was sick. That had to be the reason. He wouldn’t just ditch me like that, would he? No, he was sick.
Because he wasn’t an asshole, he just couldn’t be.
I sat there for the next thirty minutes. The minutes went as slowly as ever.
No Alex sat beside me.

It was a Wednesday, which meant gym in the first period. I couldn’t really care less. It was the same class as every other, wasn’t it? Only I had to pretend to be cheerful to get a good grade. I managed that. We learned to dance. I was the last one to be asked, so I had to dance with the teacher. It wasn’t a new thing, I was indifferent. I wasn’t being bullied. I didn’t have to cover bruises, or cry myself to sleep. I just didn’t have any friends. I can’t imagine Akon really knowing what being lonely actually meant.
The class ended. We changed. I went outside, and did as I always do. I sat down. We had a fifteen minute break then, just enough amount of time to read a bit in the book I’d just bought.
I pulled it up from my bag, and opened it. I didn’t see anything but the book. I saw the fairies that flew there, the wizards and the gnomes, and I felt home, at last. When I looked up from my book, Alex was sitting next to me. He was looking curiously at the book I had in my hands. I gave it to him, and he read the synopsis. We were silent.
He handed me my book back, and smiled.
”Where were you yesterday?” I asked.
“I was at home. I had to look after my brother, since my mother had left.”
He had a sad smile in his eyes, and he begged me silently to not ask questions. I didn’t.
We sat besides each other for the last five minutes of the break. We didn’t speak.
We were loners, but we were loners together.