In Fate's Hands

I honestly had no idea what love was. Three months ago, I could give a flying fuck if someone cared about me or not. All I needed was sex, cigarettes, insults, and alcohol to keep me going.

I had no friends, just fuck buddies. They only hung around me because of the sex, and because of my brother. He could get us anything we wanted, and his house is party central. Looking back on it, Nathan really doesn’t care. He doesn’t care if I get caught doing something I’m not supposed to be doing. He wouldn’t bail me out of jail if his life depended on it. He would blame it on me and leave it up to me to get myself out. He’s just a selfish bitch. I guess money does that to a person.

Now, at this moment, I realize that what I thought was paradise three months ago was hell. The boy laying on my chest, breathing lightly, evenly, looking so peaceful, is proof of that.

The haze I was living in is nothing compared to what I’m living in now.

I don’t know where I would be right now if Riley wasn’t here with me.

He made me realize what it’s like to have friends that actually care about you. Whenever I’m having a rough day, Riley, Ian, and Nick make me their top priority. I don’t ask for it, they just do it.

But more importantly, Riley taught me and showed me what it actually means to be in love. I don’t think it’s possible for me to love anyone else as much as I love Riley.

I looked down at him; I swear he’s smiling in his sleep. I’ve never seen anyone that looked so cute when they slept.

I smiled, taking back what I said. I know it’s not possible for me to love anyone else as much as I love Riley. I can see myself spending the rest of my life with him. I hope he can see the same thing.

I elbowed Riley, thinking it was about time for him to wake up, no matter how adorable he looked.

He didn’t stir.

I slid him off of me and crawled down to his level as he faced the opposite way of me.

I brushed his hair from his ear and started whispering his name in it.

He finally made some sort of movement telling me he was awake, flipping over to face me.

I pressed my lips against his and he surprisingly started kissing back, though basically still asleep. “It’s after one in the afternoon, we should probably get up.”

“Mmm…five more minutes.” He said, pulling himself against me, his arms around my waist.

I couldn’t help but let out a little laugh. “Riley, that’s what you said two hours ago.”

He attempted to say “Nuh uh”, but it got caught up in a yawn and came out “Nuh…uuhhh…”

I decided to take this into my own hands, literally, and I started tickling his sides, because I know how ticklish he is.

He tried rolling away from me, but I just crawled over to him and pinned him down, continuing the tickle torture.

“Okay, okay, okay, okay! I’m. Up. Stop. Tickling me!” He said, laughing to the point of tears.

I laughed and stopped moving my fingers, keeping my hands on his waist. I leaned down to kiss him. “Good morning.” I said, not able to keep a smile off my face.

He hit my arm, rolling his eyes. “Yeah, morning.”

I pouted. “No good?”

He giggled, shaking his head. “Fine. Good morning.”

I smiled and kissed him once more, even though I wanted to do more, and got off of him, getting out of bed and dressing myself. Riley (unfortunately) did the same.

Riley opened the door and we walked down the hallway, Riley half shuffling down the hall, still half asleep.

“It’s about time you guys emerge!” Ian said, smiling.

“You’ve been here the whole time?” Riley asked, seeing his cheeks darken in an embarrassed blush.

“Your parents said that we could sleep here. We got to shower and everything.” Nick said. I saw him steal a glance at Ian, and my jaw almost dropped.

Wow.

Before I could say something, Riley started freaking out. “Wow, really? In my shower? Why in my shower?!”

The way Ian and Nick looked at each other blew their cover completely before they started laughing. They were just giving Riley shit.

“Don’t worry, hun, we’re kidding. Both of us showered separately. We have more respect than to do that in someone else’s shower.” Ian said, wiping tears from his eyes.

Riley’s grudge didn’t last long as we both sat on the floor at Nick and Ian’s feet.

“So how was it?” I heard Ian and Nick ask from above us.

I was going to tell them, but then I just smirked. “Wouldn’t you like to know.”

They both scoffed and ended it at that. They knew they weren’t going to get anything out of us.

I went to run my fingers through Riley’s hair, but saw that it still had a little bit of frosting in it.

“Hey.” I whispered in his ear.

He looked up at me from my shoulder.

“You should go shower. You still have frosting in your hair.” I said, smiling.

“Oh yeah?” He asked, leaning up to kiss me. “Well so do you.”

“Are you suggesting something?” I asked, my smile turning into a smirk.

“Possibly.” He said, running his finger down the middle of my chest, looking up at me through his hair.

Before I could agree to whatever he was thinking, I grabbed his hand, lacing my fingers with it. “I would love to, but your two best friend and parents would hear us, and that would be nothing sort of embarrassing.”

“Not to mention your parents use that shower.” Ian said, coughing afterwards, acting like he said nothing.

I gave him the bird and kissed Riley again. “Go shower. You stink.”

Riley stuck his tongue out and stood up, going into his room.

Once I heard the shower going, Ian and Nick scooted onto the floor, sitting on each side of me, linking their arms with mine.

“Ethan.” Ian said, a big, geeky smile on his face.

“Tell us.” Nick finished Ian’s sentence.
I smiled, shaking my head. “All I’m going to say is that I’ll be sticking around for a while.”