A Light on in Chicago

“Joe, how do you know who she is?” Andy asked rather quietly. He was the most composed besides Scout, who still hadn’t snapped out of her daydreams.

“I was in a couple bands with her when I was just getting in to the scene. She played that funky piano thing… keytar! Good at it, too. Then there was Fall Out Boy and we were going places, so she fell in with another crowd. I never found out what happened with her. Apparently she got in with Mike though. But why is she warning us about friends in town? And how did she know we were out for dinner? We went out pretty late,” Joe explained, but he didn’t help anyone stop worrying.

“Okay. So you knew her. That doesn’t tell us much of anything about why she’s leaving messages from Mike’s number. And I don’t even know what’s up with the ‘dandy occasion’ bit,” Pete talked to try and figure things out. He tried to spell everything out in words and fit all the pieces together. That way he wasn’t running around like a chicken with its head cut off like Marcy, Andy hot on her trail trying to calm her down. Patrick was still cooing over Scout, trying to get her to snap out of it, which left the two of them to dissect Lizzy’s message.

Joe didn’t have to think long before he remembered something. “Pete, you’re an idiot. We’re all idiots for not figuring it out sooner,” he said. “’Dandy occasion’? Brendon and Bill’s calls? They were right. The Dandies – I don’t know how, don’t ask me to figure that one out – are after us. And I’d bet you anything they were on their way to L.A. We’re screwed.”

“They’re already here.”

“Scout? What did you say?” Patrick was in a right tizzy over her finally speaking again.

She still didn’t move her head, but spoke again. “The cards. They’re here already. They know where we are. They’re after us. The Dandies.” Then she got up and went to the back of Patrick’s house where they were gathered. She went into her room and shut the door, locking it shut before Patrick could fuss over her anymore.

Marcy had stopped her crazed pacing when Scout started talking. Now she was frozen, trying to catch up on what was going on around her. “This is serious, isn’t it? What are we gonna do?” she asked to no one in particular.

“Isn’t it obvious? We hunt them before they get to us. Guys, I hope you remember all that crap from the 16 Candles video. This is for real,” Joe said. He’s quickly become the guy in charge here. “Pete, call everybody on your phone. We’re gonna need backup.”

And that’s what they did.

Three days later, they’ve basically flown in or gathered from the Southern California area everyone who helped with the video where the Dandies first showed up and might know what they’re up against. Brendon’s there and he’s dragged Spencer along with him. Bill’s brought The Butcher and Sisky with him. Chizzy’s in Australia with his family right now, and no one seems to be able to get a hold of Mike. Everyone’s a bit worried about that.

Pete talks Travis into coming too. Travie, for some reason, still has the number of Jack, one of the guys who taught them how to fight. And somehow, Gerard Way finds out about the whole incident and then he’s there too! (Cause magically none of them are on tour and Gerard would give up tour to mess with vampires anyway.) He brings Mikey (Cause Mikey can chill Pete out) and Worm (There will be fighting. Worm will help.) with him. So there are sixteen of them all told, against some unknown number of a vicious vampire gang.

(“We need a name! We’re fighting a gang, we need a gang name!” Spencer yells once they’re all gathered.

“Well, there’s sixteen of us, right? So what about – just throwing it out there ‘cause of how this whole mess started – The 16 Candles? I know it’s totally lame, but whatever, it’s the best I got,” Marcy suggests after no one else volunteers anything.

“Heck yes! 16 Candles it is!” he yells some more. They high-five, and the name sticks somehow.)

They’re kind of a big giant awkward mess.

Ashlee’s gone south with Bronx to stay with her family for a while. Pete insisted on it, but now he’s a wreck without them. Patrick can’t stop yelling at him to get it together long enough to figure out anything to use against the Dandies. Scout’s turning into the gracious host, figuring out where everyone can sleep and finding a crummy gym they can rent out for practice space.

Brendon’s really freaking nervous about the whole deal. He’s spastic and wants to spar with anyone who’ll fight with him. If you think you’ve seen anything weirder than the lead singers of Panic! at the Disco and My Chemical Romance kung-fu-mastering in Pete Wentz’s kitchen, trying not to trip over Hemingway and bags of food from the grocery store, you’d better think again.

But they’re learning. Jack will teach a few people something and it’s a train reaction and soon everyone can do spinning kicks and badass right hooks. Chuck Norris would be proud. They’re getting it together. They’re gonna beat up some Dandies. Hopefully. Eventually.