Give Love a Try

Dear Nate;

Um. I don't even know how to start this letter but here it goes.

If you didn't figure it out yet, I’m gone. Well, going anyway. I don't feel right being here anymore. That kiss must be a mistake right Nate? It wasn’t real right? You must agree. I usually would never admit to this, but I’m scared Nate. I'm scared of losing myself. I'm scared of losing my stature and my reputation. But most of all I'm scared; actually, I'm terrified of losing you.

I’m sorry I stole your song. I’m sorry for all the stupid fights that I (admittedly) started. I’m sorry for breaking promises. I'm sorry for the tears you cried. I’m sorry for the concussion that almost happened. Most of all I’m sorry for killing everything we had Nate. I think we would’ve been good together, even if I denied it for so long.

Am I ridiculous for thinking that I actually had a chance? You've got friends. People adore you. They adore you for your voice, your guitar skills, as well as the piano, drums, bass and tambourine. What do I have? Sure I can sing; I can play guitar. But, you, you're amazing Nate; at everything you do you're perfect. But, who do I have?
I have no one.
I never will.
But Nate; you have me. You'll always have me.

Sincerely,
Shane Sebastian Grey.
P.S.
Nate. I...have to go.

I looked up and saw Jason watching me. Sympathy clouded is expression. He was leaving because of me. He wasn’t going to say goodbye to anyone else because of me. I was going to lose him completely if I didn’t do something. There was no way he’d come back next summer.

"What do I do?" I choked out.

"Go after him," Jason smiled at me. I chewed my lip, considering what
Jason just proposed.

"Where would I even start?"

"Just run, run to the end of the camp drive way. He said he was leaving. That doesn't mean he's already gone! Just go Nate." Jason stood up, yanking me to my feet and half shoved me out the door. It was raining, actually it was pouring. Late August rains had set in. I turned and ran.

Within a few minutes I was drenched. My button down was see-through, my jeans were heavy, and my chucks were clad with mud. All of which I didn't care about. It was night, but I could still see the black clouds shrouding the sky. At the end of the driveway, there were lights, car lights, lights from a taxi.It must be him. No one else would be leaving. I ran faster. I had to run faster. If I didn't catch him I would never see him again.

"Shane!"

I slowed to a jog as I approached him. His straight, raven hair was drenched and flat to his forehead and the back of his neck. He wore a leather jacket and black jeans, but his white v-neck shirt stuck to the parts of his abdomen that were visible. I stopped a few inches in front of him. Shane looked at me, both confused and amazed. I took one last step towards Shane and looked him directly in the eye.

"Shane," I said loudly, over the thunder that was now rumbling in the distance. "You have me."

And with that I kissed him. It wasn't a timid, shy kiss. It was powerful, emotional. It was full of love. That's what I felt for Shane. After everything; after every argument, after every shouting match, after times of not talking for weeks at a time, I had fallen in love with him. As Shane kissed me back, I felt completely content. I smiled against his mouth and I felt him smile back. I pulled away and smiled properly at him.

"I love you Shane," I said aloud for the first time. He looked shocked to begin with. Fear hitched in my chest. I’d ruined everything. I had.

"I love you too, Nate," he answered me. We fell silent; just looking at
each other. After a few minutes, Shane broke the silence.

"Oh and Nate?" Shane smiled.

"What?" I smiled, confused.

"Happy Birthday."