Losing Touch

I groaned as my aching joints popped. It was my second week back on the road, and I had feeling worse each and every day. I stood up as straight as I could and decided to try and find someone to keep me company. I walked around in the parking lot a little and found no one. I gave up since I felt my legs growing weak and I trekked back to the van.

The van was in my vision, but the closer I got - the more my legs started to wobble. The walk there seemed to grow longer and longer and my breathing got shallow.

I heard footsteps from the other side of the van, and I prayed that they saw me and how shaky I was. Soon, I saw Garrett’s face through the windows. I tried to concentrate on my steps, but it was getting harder and harder.

“Zoe!” I heard before my knees grew weak and I knew they were going to let me fall onto the concrete. Before I hit anything, the last thing I remembered was Garrett’s arm around my waist and him calling for the rest of the guys.

---

I opened my eyes to find I was laying on a fake leather couch with five guys staring down at me. I blinked a few times and I heard sighs of relief.

“Holy shit, Zoe. You scared the crap outta us.” Kennedy said and hugged me once I sat up.

“What happened? All I remember is Garrett catching me. Thanks, by the way Garrett.”

“No problem Zoe.” he responded.

“Well, apparently you were walking to the van when Garrett saw you and caught you right before you passed out. You’ve been laying here for almost an hour.” my brother explained while running a hand through his hair. I could only imagine what stress he must be feeling right now. He is the only one who knew about my health condition and I was hoping to keep it that way as long as possible. I didn’t want to be treated any differently than I was now.

“Okay.” I said quietly and looked around the room. I saw Pat and Jared eyeing me nervously and they both offered sympathetic looks. I smiled sadly back at them and they seemed to take the hint and walked out of the room. Garrett also left, after I nodded to him. I looked at Kennedy, who I now noticed had slightly bloodshot eyes. I smiled and kissed his cheek and he hugged me and then walked out of the room.

I looked over to the corner and there I saw my husband, looking absolutely worried. He sighed and made his way over to me where he kissed me and hugged me tightly. I squeezed back as tightly as I could, which was weak compared to John’s embrace.

“Zoe, I was so fucking scared. I thought you were gone for a minute. Because Garrett was freaking out and I was the last one out there and I didn’t know what was going on. All I saw was you slumped in his arms. I was so scared, I just ran back inside and thought of what horrible thi-” I stopped him by putting my hand over his mouth.

He deflated and I tried smiling at him. It came out weak, but it made him happy and shut him up. I kissed him softly on the cheek and looked at his tense face.

“Don’t worry about me. At least I’m here, right?” I said trying to convince myself, more than John. He nodded at me and kissed me once again and we both stood up. We intertwined our hands and made our way out into the hall where Garrett and Pat were being their immature selves.

“You guys can go back in now.” I said with a smile. Garrett nodded his head and they both charged in, ready to make a mess. I smiled at their antics as John and I made our way outside. I walked past This Century and their crew, and we decided on walking down the street to Starbucks.

“I love you John.” I stated out of nowhere. I looked up to see his smiling face down onto mine. He pecked me on the lips as we kept walking. Soon, I saw girls with The Maine and This Century T-shirts on approach us in a frenzy. John tightened his grip on my hand, but that wasn’t able to stop them from pushing me away from my husband.

Soon, I was towards the back of the crowd, which was far away from John. As I neared the very edges of the deformed circle, a girl pushed me so forcefully that I hit the concrete. And because I was so frail, I fell completely onto the blacktop and my head slightly hit it, due to my elbows and butt taking most of the damage.

I laid there with pain surging throughout my entire body and I felt like I couldn’t move without assistance.

After a minute, I heard a girl scream. “Is she okay!?” and she came running to my side. She kneeled down and I looked at her somewhat adolescent face. She must’ve been only sixteen or seventeen.

“Are you okay?” she questioned.

“Not really. Could you call John? Say Zoe needs him.” I asked surprised at how childlike my voice sounded.

“Are you his wife?”

I nodded my head and she gave me a nod and she stood up. “John!!” she shouted over the girls. “JOHN!” she yelled even louder, and I had assumed she had gotten his attention. “Zoe needs you!!” she said and I soon heard John’s panicked voice.

“Excuse me! Please, please let me through!!” he said as he made his way through the mob. I looked up and saw his distressed face look upon me. His eyes went wide and he kneeled next to me just as the girl did. He looked up to her and gave her his pass. “Could you go ask for Kennedy please? And if they don’t let you in even with this, then tell them it’s about Zoe and that John sent you.”

I saw her nod her head once again and she gave a fairly reassuring smile as she ran off.

“I love you Z.” he said and placed a kiss on my forehead. He took my head and squeezed it as I tried smiling back. As much as I tried to believe I was going to get better, this day only proved me wrong. I closed my eyes, and I felt a single tear roll down my cheek.