Determination

Hailey felt incredibly out of place. Chase’s house was small and homey, but the other girl couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable in the situation. The cocoa-skinned girl was bustling about in the kitchen, making tea for Hailey.

Sitting with her legs curled underneath her on a coach in the living room, Hailey snuggled underneath the thick fleece blanket Chase had given her. Despite her hesitation and unease, Hailey was glad to be here. She couldn’t be at her house right now; it was too much, being alone in that house that was so much like her. The unwanted kinship to the bleak building was overbearing, suffocating. The blonde shuddering, the memory of her panic attack because of this still in the front of her mind.

It was then that Chase walked in, two steaming mugs of tea in her hands. “It’s an herbal tea, for relaxation,” she said, handing a cup to Hailey and sitting down on the couch about a foot away from the other girl. “I thought it would be the best choice.”

Hailey smiled at the girl, both a little shocked and joyful that Chase wasn’t her normal, in your face, overly inquisitive self. Nonetheless, Hailey was grateful. “Thank you,” she said, taking a sip of the tea. They sat there in silence for a few minutes, until Chase suddenly got up and left the room. Confused, Hailey watched as the other girl fiddled around with the CD player/radio combination on the mantle. Before long, a NOFX song started to play and the blonde smiled as the familiar melody filled the silence that surrounded the two girls.

“You like NOFX?”

Hailey nodded in response to Chase’s question, quietly humming along to the music. A few songs passed before Chase spoke again. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but…what happened this weekend?” It was with a fierce determination to restrain from crying that Hailey shut her eyes tightly, taking a few deep breaths as the feelings from earlier returned.

“My house, it’s…empty. Silent. Suffocating. I guess it just got to me this morning. You probably think that’s silly, right?”

“No, I don’t. I also think there are more underlying problems. You spent the night at the lake Friday.” Chase’s voice was quiet, and her statement caught Hailey off guard. No one had paid attention to her in so long, that the fact Chase was kind of touched her heart. Hailey wasn’t sure how to answer that sentence, though. What could she say? Instead she just looked down at the mug her pale fingers were wrapped around, letting the words hang in the air. As the current song finished, Chase spoke again. “I’m sorry for bringing that up. It’s just….I know I don’t know you well, but it’s obvious to me that you’re struggling with something. I picked up on it the first time we spoke. Today was going well, and you seemed to be somewhat comfortable, but I shouldn’t have brought it up. I’m sorry.”

Biting her lip, Hailey searched her mind for the right words. “Don’t be sorry…you really don’t have anything to be sorry for. It’s not your fault you give a damn about everyone.” Tucking a strand of her flaxen hair behind her ear, Hailey mentally scolded herself for being hard on the other girl. Even though she didn’t want friends, the blonde didn’t need to be mean to Chase.

“I am sorry, though. All I want is to be your friend, and it seems you just put more and more distance between us because I’m trying. If you want, I’ll leave you alone from now on after today.”

It was then that Hailey realized how nice of a person Chase was. All she really wanted was for everyone to be happy, and that wasn’t a bad thing. Hesitating, she thought over everything, trying to decide. Chase was a good person. She wanted to be Hailey’s friend. Hailey had a feeling that Chase wouldn’t press her to share her secrets; though, seeing as Hailey had shared something just a few minutes previous, it was evident that there was some trust in the other girl. Was it trust? It had been a long time since Hailey had trusted anyone besides herself, and even that trust was small. But yes, she decided, it was trust.

She wasn’t sure exactly why she trusted Chase. The other girl just seemed trustworthy, and despite her slightly annoy perkiness, she was a sweetheart. Looking up at Chase with tearing eyes, she shook her head. “I don’t want that, I think. This friends thing? I want to try it.”