Giving Up the World

For two weeks now, I've been living with my father on the other side of town. I don't know any one over here and all day I just sit in my room and do one of two things; Talk on the phone with Annabell, or play my guitar. I never leave. There's no point. Well, I go to school, of course, but other than that, I just sit in my room all day. I long for the weekends when I get to see my mom and Annabell and my friends, but weekends aren't enough. School started only 3 months ago and summer was so far from now. I could only hope that I'd be able to go to my mother's for Thanksgiving break and Winter break. The distance and short amount of time we had together was killing me.

A knock on my door pulled me from my thoughts and a groan escaped my lips. I knew it was just my father and I didn't want to talk to him. I rarely talk to him. It's not that I don't like him it's just that he's never around or the fact that we don't have a lot to talk about. It's awkward and I don't like it.

"Son, Gerard's here to see you." I heard my father call through my door.

At the sound of Gerard's name, I perked up and pushed myself off my bed. Quickly, I opened the door to my room and jumped up the stairs, taking two steps at a time as I went from my room in the basement to the main floor. As I made it into the hallway that lead to the front door where I saw Gerard standing, my father walked back into the living room to watch tv.

"Gerard!" I cheered as he shut the door behind him and I ran at him. I engulfed him in a hug and he wrapped his arms around me, chuckling.

"Good to see you, Frank." He ruffled my hair before we let go of each other.

I hadn't seen Gerard in awhile. When I was still at my moms house, he always came over because of my drinking day. Every day he'd come over and ask me how I was. He was just trying to help but I didn't like that he thought I was going to drink every two seconds. It was one mess up and the aftermath was not worth doing it again. But to be honest, I missed his company.

I tugged on his hand for a moment before telling him that we should go down to my room and hang out. He nodded and followed me down. I closed the door before sitting on my bed while he sat in the swivel chair across from me.

"How've you been?" He asked.

I shrugged, "I'm fine." I smiled at him.

He shook his head and rolled his eyes, "I know you're happy to see me but I want to know if you're happy being here, Frank."

My smile faded and was replaced with a frown. I sighed and laid back on my bed, staring up at the ceiling fan that swirled slowly above me, causing a light breeze to hit my face. My room was always so hot and stuffy. I ended up sleeping naked, most nights. My dad wasn't a fan of that, though.

"I hate it." I spoke. "I don't want to live here, but no matter what I do, I can't get away. I don't have any friends here, no girlfriend, no you, no Mikey, and no mom. There's nothing but my dad and he's barely even here. Why the hell would this place be the best fucking place for me to stay?!" I yelled, not even realizing my voice had gotten louder until I finished the question.

Gerard was silent for a few moments. I heard him stand up and felt him sit on the bed. He laid down next to me and stared up at the ceiling fan as I was. "I'm sorry, Frank."

I shook my head, "It's not your fault."

"Well it's not yours either." Gerard defended. "This isn't fair at all. You're not happy here. Not at all. You're all alone with no one. How could your father even possibly think that's okay? You need to be happy, Frank. And not just on the weekends."

"I appreciate it, Gerard, but there's no way I can go live with my mother. I've pleaded to my father but he just yells at me and says no. I told my mom I'd get a job to help her with the bills but she won't let me. Why doesn't anyone want me happy, Gerard? Why do they just keep me miserable? What have I done!?" I had yelled again and not noticed it.

Gerard sat up and looked down at me, a frown on his face. "I'm not going to sit here and listen to you scream." He stood up and I felt deserted. "Get up. I've got a car, I'm taking you to go see your friends." He spoke.

I sat up quickly and furrowed my eyebrows, "What?"

"C'mon, Frank. Daylight doesn't last forever, y'know." Gerard said, trying to get me to hurry.

I got up off my bed and slipped on my shoes. I pulled a jacket on because it was a bit chilly out and it'd definitely be cold by the time I got home. Gerard began to head upstairs and I followed close behind.

As we passed the living room I called to my dad, "I'm going out with Gerard for a few hours. Bye."

Without waiting for a response from him, Gerard and I headed outside and got into his car. It felt like I was escaping from jail. It felt like all the chains and handcuffs that pinned me down were gone. I was free, but I knew this was only parole.