Dying to be Thin

There is only one person,

That I even bother going to school for.

His name is Aaron.

If it weren’t for him,

I’d just drop out.

It’s not like I’m even passing,

Any of my classes.

It’s not even like I’m trying.

It’s too hard to focus,

With Ana screaming in my head,

And hunger coursing through my veins.

He used to be shorter than me,

Aaron did.

He’s gotten taller though,

Towering a good 3 inches above me.

He used to be scrawny,

All awkward angles,

And discombobulated joints.

But,

Over the summer,

He has bulked up.

Ribbons of muscle,

Wrapping around his arms.

A six pack,

Sprouting up on his tanned stomach.

And somehow,

His red hair,

The color I always used to tease him about,

Has made him even more attractive.

He is my best friend,

At least he used to be.

His status?

Taken,

By one Rachael Lewis.

She is:

Blonde,

Blue-eyed,

Skinny,

And perfect.

Everything Ana wishes I was,

Everything I strive to be,

Everything I fail at.

Oh,

She also hates my guts.

And I know,

If it came down to it,

He would always pick her over me.

Because as much as I love him,

Aaron is the good guy,

The nice guy.

The one that fell headoverheels,

For a girl that doesn’t really care.

And now he can’t lose her.

She’s got him wrapped around her perfectly manicured finger,

So tightly,

He can hardly think for himself.

He’ll never leave her,

Not now.

Especially,

When I’m the consolation prize.

But maybe,

When I finally reach my goal weight,

Of 84 pounds,

When I’m finally pretty,

When I’m finally thin,

When I’m finally perfect,

He’ll see.

He’ll see that I’ve been here all along,

That I’ve been the one,

Standing by his side,

This entire time.

I've been the one,

Who has always loved him.

Maybe,

He’ll see,

That I’m good enough.

And worthy enough,

Of him.

In every way,

That his bitchy girlfriend isn’t.

And we’ll live happilyeverafter.

Fat chance.