Passing Looks and Disappointed Faces

[Frank's P.O.V.]

The only thing I could truly feel was the gentle rocking caused by Gerard carrying me to my room. The tears had dried trails down my cheeks, sticky and constricting over the skin. My entire body was shaking in his arms, his hands firmly holding me against me, preventing me from slipping. I had wrapped my legs around his waist, our hips pressed tightly against each other. It didn't matter, though; none of it mattered. The door creaked open, its hinges slightly rusted by time. It clicked shut then as he passed over the threshold, the lock being set in the near dark.

"Frankie?" he whispered, tone questioning, curious. Knowing I couldn't reply, I shook my head, holding onto him tighter than before. A sigh brushed against my exposed neck, the silky black locks of his hair tickling the same. The world was set into motion again as he shifted, feet shuffling along the dirty carpet. I could feel him lowering himself onto the bed, still clutching my shirt tightly, afraid that if he let go I would fall. And I was afraid as well; afraid of so many things. But still he held me, shifting so he could rest his back against the headboard.

Parting slightly, I looked into his pale moonlit face. He returned the gaze, a gentle smile gracing his lips now as he looked back. His hand lifted from my back, wiping delicately at my cheeks, brushing away the stray tears that had dried on my skin. Another smile crossed his lips as he replaced the hand to its original position, intertwining both over my spine. "How've you been?" he asked cheekily, pressing a gentle, fluttering kiss over my bruised eyelids. A laugh, brittle and wry, escaped my lips as I opened my eyes again.

"Off, Gee, off."

"And that means?"

"I told them."

"What'd you tell them?" Though his voice was calm, his eyes had widened, his breathing quickened. His heart beat steadily against his cage of bone, his fingers tightening over my shirt.

"I told them what happened. I didn't tell them about you and some other shit but I basically told them everything." I shrugged, averting my gaze. He sighed again but said nothing more, pressing me tighter to him to the point where a whimper escaped my mouth. Apologizing quickly, he loosened his hold, hands beginning to run in gentle circles over my back.

"Babe; you do realize how screwed we are, don't you?"

"We? We? I'm the one who killed someone. I'm the one who fucked up and started all this shit." My voice was such a harsh whisper, so furious, that he looked taken aback. His hands stilled over my back, over the hem of my shirt.

"Damn it, Frank. It's my problem too; you've got to realize it. I'm an accomplice now and I'll face the same problems if they find out."

"You're the idiot who decided it was a good idea to help out a murderer."

"You're the fucktard who won't accept the help I'm offering you."

"If I'm such a fucktard why am I letting you stay here now? I should have just ignored your fucking demands to stay here."

"You didn't want to let me stay here because of your grandparents, not because of anything I've offered you. You're just ashamed of who you really are. You can't hide it."

"I'm not ashamed; I'm prouder of who I am than you. Look at you; you're a twenty-something year old who's still living in his parents basement."

"You're the eighteen-year-old who can't even protect himself against his mother. You're the boy who hides out in his grandparent's house when he's got problems."

"Says you. You probably haven't even tried making a name for yourself. You'd rather stay at home and drink down your stupid vodka and get drunk off your ass, alone."

"You don't even give a shit about people, Frank. You haven't got an ounce of respect for anyone; probably didn't even feel any remorse when you killed that man." Shocked, sputtering for any counterattack, I merely stared at him, finding that I had been gripping his jacket tightly. Gritting my teeth, I released him, pushing myself off of his warm body roughly.

"Fuck you, Gerard. Fuck you." It was all I could come up with as I tore myself away from his prone body. The rage seemed to drain from his tensed body, his mouth falling open in shock. His words had hurt more than I thought they would; they struck a chord deep in my heart. I cared plenty; I had never meant to kill him. I had never meant to really hurt him, despite my revenge-driven dreams. I was just trying to protect myself; I was just trying to save my own life. I began pacing the room, running my hands through my hair in rage.

"Frankie-" Before he could speak anymore, I ordered him to shut up harshly, pausing in my pacing. How dare he try to speak after what he had said! How dare he try to cover up what he had done! Clenching my jaw again, I continued to pace, checking the doorknob out of the corner of my eyes to see if it was truly locked. Satisfied, I ignored it, kicking at a pile of discarded objects from the rage coursing through my veins. He stood now, walking towards the door. Assuming he would be leaving, I unlocked the door, motioning it to him angrily as I turned back to my bed.

"You should have never come," I whispered roughly, throwing myself onto my bed. Burrowing my head into the pillow, I inhaled deeply only to find that the scent embedded into the pillowcase was no longer the familiar one I had always encountered. Feeling frustrated, I grabbed the offending object, throwing it blindly in the direction of the door. It was only when I heard the small grunt that followed that I realized Gerard hadn't bothered leaving me.

"I'm so sorry; I never meant it."

"But you said it, Gee."

"As if what you said didn't hurt me!"

"I just spoke the fucking truth."

"You don't know me enough to say that shit about me." His hands were suddenly at my sides, harshly flipping me onto my back. "Now just listen to me," he demanded, straddling my waist, hands keeping mine over my head. Resisting the urge to spit in his too-perfect face, I struggled to free myself, kicking uselessly at thin air. Realizing as well as he did that I wouldn't scream so as to not alert my grandparents, I remained quiet, the wind completely knocked out of me. "Frank, fighting's not going to solve anything at all. I'm trying to apologize to you because, I don't know if you know this, but if we're alone, we're screwed. So just fucking stop this and listen to me."

"I'm listening," I grumbled, averting my gaze from his blazing eyes, molten gold orbs set in hollowed bone. One hand was removed from my wrists, grabbing my chin and forcing my face to his again. Lips set in a thin line, he didn't speak, gaze darting over my face. Removing his hand roughly from my chin, nails scraping just slightly against my skin, he leaned forward. Before I could really grasp what had happened, he was working his lips against mine, hands still gripping my wrists over my head. Subconsciously, I responded, matching the fervor with which he kissed me. The rage still boiling under our skin was released into the passion, greedy lips smashing against each other, teeth gnashing.

I could taste the blood from the fervor but I didn't care, ignoring the slight stinging pain developing across my bottom lip from where the ring had been pulled. He released my hands, bringing his own down my sides, making me squirm beneath him. The rage spurred us on, gave us the energy to grab at each other the way we were, desperate and needy. We pulled apart for a brief moment to catch our breath, removing our shirts and, in Gerard's case, jackets as we did so. The heavy kiss continued, our hands groping for the hem of the other's pants, the fabric becoming constricting.

Roughly I pushed him off me to allow myself room to stand. With glazed eyes he watched curiously as I walked over to the door, locking it securely. Before I knew it, he had walked towards me, pinning me harshly against the wall, sliding my pants down my legs as he did so. I mimicked his movements, the cotton material of his pajamas falling to the floor with a muffled thud. Pushing him away again, I fell to my knees, tugging at his shoelaces in order to take his Converse off, tossing them aside. When I arose, he grabbed my waist, bringing me back to the bed and pushing me roughly onto it.

Winded, I could only stare as he clambered over me, nipping at my jaw, hips grinding against mine. The friction made my head toss back in pleasure, the consequences of our actions rubbing through the fabric of our boxers. Holding back the whimpers and moans, I matched his rhythmic movements, bringing up my hips to meet his. He moaned into my mouth, hands gripping the hem of my boxers and tearing them off without any consideration, freeing my current problem.

"Fuck me," I groaned unashamedly, hands gripping his bare hips as I threw away the oppressive material still covering him. He smirked when he looked at me, lips trailing down my chest, further down, further down. Suddenly, I was engulfed in the hot, wet cavern of his open mouth, teeth grazing against my length. He bobbed his head diligently, nails digging crescents onto my skin. I was grasping his hair, biting my lip to prevent my frantic moans and screams from ricocheting throughout the house.

After a few minutes of his teeth against my skin, of the gentle pressure of his cheeks hollowing to suck, of the way his tongue lapped up the fluid, I allowed myself to fall into complete bliss. Shuddering, still trying to hold back the worst of my vocalizations, I thrust into his mouth, strands of his hair still locked between my fingers. Still shaking, limbs moving against my will, I released my hold on his scalp, mouth open in a low moan. I finally fell limp, his lips pressing a trail of kisses up my abdomen to my lips again, letting me taste my own bodily fluids on his wet tongue.

"It's your turn now," I muttered as I pulled away, flipping him over forcibly. He gazed at me with glazed eyes as I began to lower my mouth down his body, the sensitive nerves on my lips meeting with the coarse trail of hair leading down to his length. With a blush spreading across my face, I opened my mouth, taking him with only some minor hesitation. He bucked involuntarily, making me cough and gag as he hit the back of my throat. I pulled away for a moment before replacing my lips over his member; I guess now was a good a time as any to learn how to give a blowjob.