Is It Really Just Another Crush? A Kyle Gallner Love Story
14
Kyle's warm hands pressed against my back as he kissed me. I couldn't help but smile into the kiss, feeling every bit of it. My whole body was tingling, my heart warmed so much I felt like I was on fire.
I was slightly aware that this was a party. That I wasn't with Kyle, but with someone else. I was too dazed to push them off. I couldn't stop them. I wanted to scream. Their face was blurry, but I knew it was wrong, whoever this was.
"Now, I finally get you." I heard them say. Did they say it? Was I dreaming this?
Where am I? What is going on? My thoughts are jumbled, but the more he touches me the more relaxed I become. But I don't want to become relaxed. I want Kyle. This whole scene seems very deja vu to me. I don't know what to do. I cannot will my mouth to open. It is like I have been slammed shut.
Then the guy takes off my underwear when I know what's about to happen. I try to push him away, but my hands cannot reach him. I cannot stop him. I am in pain, not ready to do this. I scream as loud as I can, but I don't utter a sound.
I jump out of bed, screaming. My breath heaving as I look around my room. It was just a dream. Just a dream...
Kyle's warm arms are wrapped around me. I feel safer now. I try to control my breathing, but with no prevail.
"Shhh. Shh. It's okay, it was just a dream." Kyle whispers in my ear. I try to take a deep breath but I can't.
"It-it was so real." I say quietly. My body slowing down, no longer scared.
"What happened?" Kyle turns me so I'm looking at him. I take a deep breath.
"I-I was at a party. I was drugged... It was horrible. Like I couldn't move... I couldn't tell him to stop." My head was pounding. Realization was coming over me.
Kyle leans away from me. He takes my hand and kisses ever finger.
"Were you being... raped?"
I nod slowly. I can't look at his face. It's masked... upset.
"It was just a dream right? Tell me the truth, it was just a dream?" I ask. He looks up at me and takes my face in his hands.
"Do you know something about yourself?" Kyle asks me. I shake my head.
"What do you mean?"
"You tend to push things that scare or hurt you out of your brain so you don't think about them. I don't know how to explain it. But you did... at one point... meet me before. A few months before I moved here. It was at the party. I was with Paul and he introduced us. You showed an interest in me and I showed an interest in you. We danced and you left to get a drink. You had just broken up with Jake and he was really upset with you. Paul told me a lot of things, but nothing that you told me. He just said that Jake used to be mean to you, put you down a lot. I should have gone with you. While you were getting your drink, you turned your head because someone had called your name. Jake had slipped the drug into your drink. Before you knew it, you were passed out on the bed upstairs when he... did what he did. He pled guilty to the court, and won. After that, I guess you did what you always do when you are hurt. You blocked the painful memory out. Paul told me that you do this, so I wasn't surprised that you didn't remember me when I met you again. But I'm glad I did decide to meet you again. I wouldn't be marrying you now." Kyle smiles. I try to digest everything he just told me.
"So you're telling me no one had the good grace to tell me the truth about my rape? I had to find out on my own?" I ask, bitterly. Kyle's gorgeous face drops.
"I didn't find out till a few weeks ago."
"But you didn't tell me." Fury builds in my voice.
"I wanted to protect you." Kyle's voice is sincere, but I don't believe him.
"You lied to me. No, worse, you just didn't tell me anything. That's so much better." My words come out like fire. I feel bad for being upset with him.
"I was told not to tell you anything. By your mother."
"I hate her sometimes." I look away and then decide to tease him, "Fine, I won't be mad at you, I'll just hold love making out of the question."
Kyle's eyebrow furrows, "I thought we had this discussion a few days ago. We make love once a month, barely."
"That's not my fault." I hold up my palms.
"And besides, I know all your weak spots. I can get you going quickly." Kyle smirks. I roll my eyes.
"Yeah right, bubba. I don't think so. I know what can get you going." I smile deviously.
"You know what this conversation is going to lead into right?" Kyle asks, an eyebrow raised.
"Us doing it?"
"Yeah... and you're loud so we can't wake your little sister up." He smiles and I punch him lightly in the chest.
"You're so mean."
"Whatever... fiancee."
"Ugh you know I hate that word."
"Fiancee? What's wrong with the word fiancee? Aren't you my fiancee right now? FIANCEE." Kyle kisses my forehead.
"Please don't remind me." I groan.
"I love you." Kyle chuckles, kissing my cheek.
"I love you too." I cuddle into his chest.
"Go to sleep, stop bothering me woman!" Kyle whisper yells.
"You love it when I bother you."
"Definitly."
The man I'm in love with, is such a dork.
I was slightly aware that this was a party. That I wasn't with Kyle, but with someone else. I was too dazed to push them off. I couldn't stop them. I wanted to scream. Their face was blurry, but I knew it was wrong, whoever this was.
"Now, I finally get you." I heard them say. Did they say it? Was I dreaming this?
Where am I? What is going on? My thoughts are jumbled, but the more he touches me the more relaxed I become. But I don't want to become relaxed. I want Kyle. This whole scene seems very deja vu to me. I don't know what to do. I cannot will my mouth to open. It is like I have been slammed shut.
Then the guy takes off my underwear when I know what's about to happen. I try to push him away, but my hands cannot reach him. I cannot stop him. I am in pain, not ready to do this. I scream as loud as I can, but I don't utter a sound.
I jump out of bed, screaming. My breath heaving as I look around my room. It was just a dream. Just a dream...
Kyle's warm arms are wrapped around me. I feel safer now. I try to control my breathing, but with no prevail.
"Shhh. Shh. It's okay, it was just a dream." Kyle whispers in my ear. I try to take a deep breath but I can't.
"It-it was so real." I say quietly. My body slowing down, no longer scared.
"What happened?" Kyle turns me so I'm looking at him. I take a deep breath.
"I-I was at a party. I was drugged... It was horrible. Like I couldn't move... I couldn't tell him to stop." My head was pounding. Realization was coming over me.
Kyle leans away from me. He takes my hand and kisses ever finger.
"Were you being... raped?"
I nod slowly. I can't look at his face. It's masked... upset.
"It was just a dream right? Tell me the truth, it was just a dream?" I ask. He looks up at me and takes my face in his hands.
"Do you know something about yourself?" Kyle asks me. I shake my head.
"What do you mean?"
"You tend to push things that scare or hurt you out of your brain so you don't think about them. I don't know how to explain it. But you did... at one point... meet me before. A few months before I moved here. It was at the party. I was with Paul and he introduced us. You showed an interest in me and I showed an interest in you. We danced and you left to get a drink. You had just broken up with Jake and he was really upset with you. Paul told me a lot of things, but nothing that you told me. He just said that Jake used to be mean to you, put you down a lot. I should have gone with you. While you were getting your drink, you turned your head because someone had called your name. Jake had slipped the drug into your drink. Before you knew it, you were passed out on the bed upstairs when he... did what he did. He pled guilty to the court, and won. After that, I guess you did what you always do when you are hurt. You blocked the painful memory out. Paul told me that you do this, so I wasn't surprised that you didn't remember me when I met you again. But I'm glad I did decide to meet you again. I wouldn't be marrying you now." Kyle smiles. I try to digest everything he just told me.
"So you're telling me no one had the good grace to tell me the truth about my rape? I had to find out on my own?" I ask, bitterly. Kyle's gorgeous face drops.
"I didn't find out till a few weeks ago."
"But you didn't tell me." Fury builds in my voice.
"I wanted to protect you." Kyle's voice is sincere, but I don't believe him.
"You lied to me. No, worse, you just didn't tell me anything. That's so much better." My words come out like fire. I feel bad for being upset with him.
"I was told not to tell you anything. By your mother."
"I hate her sometimes." I look away and then decide to tease him, "Fine, I won't be mad at you, I'll just hold love making out of the question."
Kyle's eyebrow furrows, "I thought we had this discussion a few days ago. We make love once a month, barely."
"That's not my fault." I hold up my palms.
"And besides, I know all your weak spots. I can get you going quickly." Kyle smirks. I roll my eyes.
"Yeah right, bubba. I don't think so. I know what can get you going." I smile deviously.
"You know what this conversation is going to lead into right?" Kyle asks, an eyebrow raised.
"Us doing it?"
"Yeah... and you're loud so we can't wake your little sister up." He smiles and I punch him lightly in the chest.
"You're so mean."
"Whatever... fiancee."
"Ugh you know I hate that word."
"Fiancee? What's wrong with the word fiancee? Aren't you my fiancee right now? FIANCEE." Kyle kisses my forehead.
"Please don't remind me." I groan.
"I love you." Kyle chuckles, kissing my cheek.
"I love you too." I cuddle into his chest.
"Go to sleep, stop bothering me woman!" Kyle whisper yells.
"You love it when I bother you."
"Definitly."
The man I'm in love with, is such a dork.