Sewn My Lips Shut

My heart beated faster as I read the text a few more times. Panicking I walked from the gas station to my house. On my way there, I thought of Cynthia. Does she hate me? Is she still pregnant? Why would she have texted me? What does she want to talk about? I reached my house within a few minutes, or so it seemed like. I walked into the house and kitchen. In the refrigerator, I grabbed a Defense Vitamin Water and a tuna sandwich that my mother packed for me while she was working for the day. I felt my phone vibrate and saw that Cynthia texted me.

dude....u need to answer yer phone -!-angelsfall-!- I bit my lower lip on the left corner as I wrote a response to her text.

when and where do u want to talk? (a-man) My phone had vibrated after a minute or two.

now and at the park. u better b there -!-angelsfall-!- I finished off the sandwich and brought the drink with me.

I left the house and started walking to the park. As I was walking I was thinking of Angela. I missed how her hair smelled. Fresh Flowers. Then I started to think of Cynthia. How her hair smelled like sweet cherries, how her lips tasted like strawberries, how her touch gave me chills, how her smile made me feel better. Angela never really made feel like that. I stopped thinking about them and looked for the park. I then saw Cynthia at one of the shelters. I made my way over to her as I stuck my hands in my pocket.

"Fina-" I interrupted by hugging her. She pushed me off of her and gave me a dirty look. "As I was saying. It's about time you showed up. Did you take the long way? you know what? Don't answer that." She was basically having a conversation with herself. I just nodded for her to continue.

"Alex told me what you said. Does my friendship really mean nothing to you? Yeah I know it was stupid of me to defend John, but he's my brother. He actually shows me attention. My mother and father could give two shits less about me. My mother told me I was a mistake. He was the only family that actually treated me like something. You ruined our lives Andy. You screamed what he did to me. Don't you think I was humiliated enough when Angela fucking told everyone that I wasn't a virgin? But no, you had to join forces with her. She used to be my friend. Now she's got the whole school thinking I'm a whore. You even think that. Now everyone knows that I'm pregnant. So that supports the idea that I'm a whore." I saw tears fall from her eyes. I went to wipe them away but she smacked away my hand. "DON'T TOUCH ME!" She sniffled. "You and Alex were the only friends that I ever had. Ever since he found out, he has never been able to look at me anymore. I saw him today, before he called you. I wanted to tell him that I finally chose. I chose him over you. He wouldn't look at me. Then he told me what you said. Do you know how much that hurt when he said what you said? NO! I DON'T THINK SO! I felt like my world had stopped. No one was there to help me out of the darkness. I HATE YOU! I NEVER WANNA SEE YOU AGAI-" I interrupted her again by hugging her once more. She just broke down. I brought her in closer as she cried even harder. I hated it when she was in this state.

"Cynthia...." I said silently. She then pushed herself off of me. I just looked at her.

"Don't talk to me ever again." With that I watched her leave with more tears falling.

"I fucked up...." I felt hands on my shoulders . They were delicate. I turned around to see Angela. I pulled her into an embrace and kissed her cheek.

"You are so different from when I remembered. What happened?" I remembered that Angela was a childhood friend. She changed so much that I didn't recall that she was Angela.

"After I left, I wasn't able to contact you. I lost interest in you. Then I liked this boy named Olliver. My new friend Cynthia also liked him. Her and I were fighting over him. Then one night she called me and told me that she molested that night. I felt bad for her. I gave up on fighting and then Olliver just only looked at me as a friend. Then in September this year, she called me and told me that she wasn't a virgin anymore. I was so mad at her because I lost Olliver. I told everyone that she wasn't a virgin. That she was a whore. She never talked to me again. Olliver stopped talking to her and dated me for about a month. We both lost him." I just looked at her. She nuzzled her head on my chest.

I brought her closer to me. I then took a whiff of her hair. It didn't smell like fresh flowers. It was a more sour smell. Like sweat. I then looked down at her. Her lips were swollen and here hair was in a mess. I then found a hickey on her neck. I moved back and gave her a dirty look. She cheated on me?!

"You cheated on me." I saw her eyes widen slightly. "Don't even lie. If you were raped you would have not smelled like sweat. Why? Who?"

"I d-didn-"

"DON'T LIE TO ME! I KNOW YOU SLEPT WITH SOMEONE ELSE!" I saw her flinch.

"I was ready to have sex with you, but you never were. You always said "not now". So i went to Olliver and we fucked. Happy now?!" With that she walked away.

"WE'RE OVER ANGELA!" I screamed after her. I just watched her storm off into her car. The wheels screeched.

I made my hand go into a fist and I then punched one of the posts. It wasn't a good idea because it hurt like hell after that. I cursed inwardly at myself. I had lost everything. I lost Cynthia, a good friend, and i lost my girlfriend. Did today have to be one of the worst days? I walked around the park to take my mind off of what had just happened. I saw a group of kids huddled in a circle. It looked like they were doing drugs so I left it alone.

"Oh YEAAAAHHH!!!" I heard a girl's voice. I looked back and I saw Cynthia with a meth pipe.

I started to walk over, but I then stopped. She didn't want to see me, but her mind is set on failure from the road she just chose. She was starting to ruin her life. I walked over and pulled Cynthia out of the confusion.

"Get OFF ME ASSHOLE!" The guys she was with came over and punched me. "Ha ha ha! That's what you get for saying I deserve to be in fucking pain!" She kicked me in the stomach and I keeled over.

"Cynthia...." I got up. "Stop, you're going to ruin your life." She then gave me a dirty look once more.

"I'm going to ruin my life?! YOU already DID!" I hugged her.

"Please stop. Please." I pulled back to see emptiness in her watering eyes. I fucked up big time.