The Movies Make It Look Easy

Chapter 19

Shannon’s P.O.V:

We walked in a comfortable silence.
I glanced up at the sky. It wasn’t late but because it was winter the days were shorter and the darkness crept up quicker.
I shivered.
I didn’t know what caused it – it could be any number of reasons like how cold it was, walking so close to the particular person beside me or it could be a shiver of fear caused by the other person I’d left behind only minutes ago, the person I was supposed to feel safe with. I obviously wasn’t the only one who noticed my seemingly random shiver.
‘Are you cold?’ he said it quietly but it seemed to echo in the still air.
I shrugged because I wasn’t sure – yes I was cold (I was in a dress after all) but I didn’t know if that was why I shivered, so I stayed silent.
Nick touched my arm causing Goosebumps to cover my skin at the contact. He’d stopped walking, so I stopped too, waiting for him to say something. He clasped both my hands between his own as he frowned at me
‘you’re freezing, you should have said something’
I just shrugged again. I didn’t want to speak; I knew once I did, we’d have to talk about what had happened at the restaurant, so I let the silence grow.
Without another word, he took off his jacket and gave it to me. I put it on, nodding my thanks as I zipped it up.
It smelt like him and I had to struggle not to bury my nose in it – to say that would be embarrassing would be an understatement.

We turned to walk on and he slipped his arm around my shoulders, drawing me close to him to give us both some extra warmth, especially now that he had no jacket.
I wrapped my arm around his waist, resting my head against his shoulder – just for warmth and no other reason, I reassured myself – until we were as close as we could possibly be as we walked.
I instantly warmed right to my core and I could feel the thudding of his heart from where my head was pressed against him. We walked on, both content to stay silent.
I watched the stars as we walked.
Unlike in every movie I’d ever seen or any book I’d ever read with a scene similar to the one I was experiencing, there wasn’t a full moon brightening the night, just a crescent moon, surrounded by those few stars that could be seen through the city lights and wisps of cloud.
There were more than usual though and I took it be a good omen. I had a sudden urge to fill the silence, to hear Nick’s voice.
‘do you ever miss the stars?’
he glanced up at the sky with a look of confusion on his face.
‘but the stars are there, how can I miss them?’ he asked.
I smiled ‘I know they’re there, I mean do you not ever miss being able to look up at night and see the whole sky filled with them? You can’t do that in the city’
I paused, ‘its one thing I miss from home’
He was silent for a moment ‘I’ve never been out of the city; this is all I’ve ever known. I suppose you can’t really miss something you’ve never seen can you?’ ‘You’ve never been out of the city?’ I repeated slowly,
‘Not even for a holiday?’ I asked doubtfully.
He shrugged ‘not that I can remember anyway, maybe when I was very young though’ he looked thoughtful.
I couldn’t believe it, almost every year during the summer I’d go somewhere with my family even if it was just down the country, though we hadn’t gone in a couple of years because both of my brothers had moved out.
I’d never been a city kid, so I found it weird to hear him say he’d never experienced something that I usually took for granted.

We reached apartment number 13, but before he could go inside I stopped him with a hand on his arm as he’d done earlier.
‘Someday, I’m going to take you out of the city and show you the stars’.
He smiled then and it lifted my heart to see such happiness in his face; the way his eyes lit up and the gold and green flecks in them became more prominent. Without meaning to, I reached out and lightly traced the smile.
He froze and I smiled at him again before opening the door and walking past him into our apartment.
I clenched the hand I’d used to touch him with, my fingertips still faintly tingling.
I immediately went to my room, not letting myself glance back once and changed into the warmest, comfiest pyjamas I owned.

When I was done, I hesitated, one hand on the door handle as I tried to get my feelings in check.
No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t make myself stay mad at him. I’d been angry earlier but now I could barely grasp why.
I knew that he hadn’t brought Jenny home to spite me and if she’d wanted to come to work on time, she could have.
The truth was that I had been horribly jealous and that jealousy coupled with the things he’d said to me on Halloween night made me act without thinking and it had resulted in me shouting at him in front of everyone.
There was just something about him that drew me to him and I couldn’t put my finger on what it was – maybe it was everything.
My feelings for him had never gone away – no matter how much I tried to deny them - even after everytime I’d been angry or upset with him since we’d met and they only seemed to grow as each day passed.
I remembered the first time I saw him; I’d been instantly attracted to him and had reverted back to acting like an awkward thirteen year old girl might act around her first crush.
When Nick was around I couldn’t seem to remember why I’d ever been attracted to Lee - though the way he’d acted tonight made me wonder if I’d ever known the real him – he had never made me feel like I did with Nick.
If I was completely truthful with myself, I’d never felt like this about anyone – I’d loved Conor, he’d been my first love, but it was something that had happened and grown over time, I’d never felt the immediate and almost irrevocable attraction that I felt with Nick, with Conor or any of my past boyfriends.
It was a completely new experience and I didn’t quite know what to do with myself.
It meant so much to me aswell that despite the way I’d acted towards him, within half an hour of me shouting at him he was helping me get away from Lee. He could easily have just left me there.
Sighing at my tangled emotions and feelings, I steeled myself and went back into the living room with Nick’s jacket over one arm.

I met him coming out of the kitchen and my gaze zeroed in on the two giant mugs of tea he carried in his hands.
I stared greedily at them, throwing his jacket on the couch as I held my hands out like a child holds its arms out for a beloved teddy bear.
Chuckling, he handed me my favourite Smarties cup. I sat down cross legged on the sofa and turned so I could face him as he sat at the other end.
‘You are a life saver’ I told him happily as I blew on the hot tea, made just the way I like it – milky with no sugar.
Nick on the other hand took four sugars and I couldn’t help wrinkling my nose as he took a sip.
‘Hey don’t give me that look’ he told me as if he’d read my mind,
‘I don’t like the way you drink yours either’.
It was an old argument, one we hadn’t had in a while because we hadn’t been talking.
‘You know I never used to drink tea’ he continued conversationally
‘but ever since I’ve lived with you I’ve started drinking it all the time...probably because I never see you without a cup’ he teased.
I just shrugged, I couldn’t argue with the truth.
‘My whole family drinks a lot of tea, we always have boxes of teabags in the cupboard, just to make sure we’d never run out’ I sipped at my tea
‘It was always such a tragedy when we ran out of either teabags or milk and someone would always be immediately sent to the shop.’
He nodded ‘I can imagine...if you’re anything to go by, you’re like the tea monster’.
Mature adult that I am, I stuck my tongue out at him in response before flicking my hair over one shoulder to get it out of my face.
‘It never mattered if we had sugar or not though because my family, unlike you, aren’t soft and drink tea the proper way, without sugar’
I laughed as he glared at me over the rim of his cup.

We sat in a companionable silence until we’d finished our tea. I couldn’t help but notice that the silence didn’t once get awkward and I’ve found that there aren’t many people you can sit quietly with, without feeling the need to talk.
For some reason that thought made me ridiculously happy.
Setting my cup down on the small table beside me, I stretched my cramped legs, resting my feet on Nick’s lap. He idly laid his arm across my shins and started stroking my bare ankle as he stared at the wall opposite him with a thoughtful expression on his face. It was soothing and I could felt myself getting sleepy.
It didn’t last long though. Nick turned searching eyes on me
‘What happened earlier Shan?’ he asked softly.
I stared at the wall, mimicking his previous position, not willing to have this conversation with him.
‘Shannon?’ he prompted.
I sighed and slowly told him everything that had happened – everything Lee had said and done. I briefly thought about how it was strange that I could never even bring myself to tell my best friend who I lived with but I could tell him everything Lee had been doing.
About halfway through my story he got up and started pacing. I watched him pace, getting increasingly angry as I continued my story.
Eventually when I finished I pulled him back down onto the couch because I was getting dizzy watching him.
I kept my hand resting lightly on his arm.
‘You ok?’
He looked at me and I could see the anger in his eyes, making them cold and hard. I was glad it wasn’t directed at me.
‘I really wish I’d punched the kid in the face’ he replied slowly, rage evident in every word.
‘You know it would have made things worse’ I said soothingly, gripping his arm a bit tighter.
He stared at where our skin touched as I spoke, still angry.
‘I just wanted to leave so I’m glad you didn’t do anything’
He softened a bit. He looked me in the eyes.
‘I don’t like him Shannon and I don’t think he’s good for you’ he took breath
‘Mark told some things and–‘
‘What things?’ I interrupted.

My heart beat faster; surely Natalie or someone would have told me if he was bad news?
‘Hey look at me’ Nick brought me back to reality
‘I’m not going to tell you what he said just in case it isn’t true; I don’t want you to get the wrong impression. I don’t like the kid but if what I heard isn’t true, I don’t want you to ruin what you have with him over something I said’ he stopped and looked back to where my hand was on his arm,
‘After all, I’m hardly objective’ he said almost to himself, smiling.
I frowned to myself, not knowing what he was talking about.
‘And I think you should really think about what you’ve seen and heard and what you know about him and then make a decision’
I nodded, it made sense. I definitely didn’t want to see Lee for a couple of days - at least – I needed to think about whether or not I wanted to be with him.
‘And Shannon?’
‘Ye?’ I said absently, my thoughts still focusing on Lee.
‘I’m really sorry about, you know, the last couple of weeks, I know I’ve acted badly...and ok, ye I know that’s an understatement but I don’t know what else to say. Maybe someday I’ll tell you why I’m such an asshole’ he smiled but it dropped quickly.
I remembered Mark telling me that there was a reason for the way he acted. I wouldn’t push him for an answer though; he’d tell me when he was ready. Pretending that I hadn’t caught the meaning of his last words, I smiled at him.
‘It’s ok; we’re both in the wrong for different things. How about we just forget about it?’
He nodded ‘I’m sorry about the girl from last night, I should’ve thought about the consequences’
I laughed ‘no worries, you’re a guy, you’re driven by your hormones – not that I have even a clue what the hell anyone could possibly see in her’ he laughed ‘besides, I exaggerated earlier, I didn’t really get into that much trouble...but I could have!’
I continued quickly before he could say anything ‘the only reason I didn’t is because I’m such a model employee every other day’
I laughed, making him roll his eyes
‘Whoever said you were modest?’ he muttered, smiling
‘And I’ll try not to bring so many girls home; it’s not fair on you’
‘Promise?’
I held out my pinkie and he solemnly linked his own with mine.
‘Promise’ he confirmed.

We sat for a while before I remembered something.
‘Did you mean it earlier when you said Jenny isn’t your girlfriend?’
‘Ye why?’ he answered after a moments hesitation.
I realised it was because he was trying to remember who Jenny was.
Up until now we’d called her the skank, the slut or the bitch (ok so maybe I called her those...Nick called her the girl).
I inwardly rolled my eyes, typical man-whore attitude...and yet I couldn’t help a feeling of satisfaction at the thought that he couldn’t even remember her name. Wow, I thought, I can be a real bitch sometimes.
I noticed that Nick had the strangest expression – almost hopeful – on his face as he waited for me to answer, but I didn’t – as usual – know why.
‘Just ‘because you might want to let her know that’
I chuckled ‘she mentioned at least twice this morning that you two were going out’
I saw the barest flicker of disappointment cross his face before he nodded.
‘ye I’ll do that’ he didn’t look pretty thrilled at the idea and I didn’t blame him, Jenny wouldn’t take it well, I wouldn’t be surprised if she cried and begged, I thought maliciously.
He yawned, which set me off and we both stood up.

I was suddenly so tired I could barely stand. I walked over to him, reached up and kissed him on the cheek.
He looked at me with surprise ‘what was that for?’ he asked humorously as he absently rubbed the spot I’d just kissed.
‘Just a thank you for earlier, I really appreciate you not only helping but actually noticing I needed help in the first place’ I said quietly.
It really meant a lot to me.
‘Anytime’ he said genuinely, grabbing my hand and pulling me back to him when I turned to go to my room
‘I mean it’ he said quietly – intensely,
‘Anytime, just let me know and I’ll do what I can to help’
‘Thanks’
‘No problem, you’re my friend, of course I’d help and I know that both Mark and Jay will help you aswell if you ever need it’
I felt like bursting into tears partly from the sadness him calling me a “friend” caused and partly from happiness that the three of them would be willing to help me in anyway they could.
Before I could react, he leaned down and kissed me on the cheek, grinning cheekily as he pulled away.
‘What was that for?’ I asked, praying that my voice only sounded breathless in my head.
‘For putting up with my crap’ he smiled,
‘Now, go to bed, we both need our beauty sleep’ he said, his shoulders shaking from suppressed laughter.
Again I stuck out my tongue at him in response.
Just as I reached my bedroom door and had one hand on the handle, I paused and turned back to where he stood watching me from across the room.
‘Goodnight Nicholas’ I smiled, winking at him.
He scowled at my use of his full name, but only for a moment before he smiled in return,
‘Night Sweetheart’.
He waited until I’d closed my door before going to his own room.

My heart thumping because he’d called me “Sweetheart”, I fell asleep before my head hit the pillow.