‹ Prequel: These Things Have Changed
Status: Slowly Active
Falling Together Again
All I'm Asking for is Love
“Come in.” I said to the soft knocking. “Hey, are you alright?” Jordan asked closing the door behind him. “Yea. I’m fine.” I said tucking a piece of stray hair behind my ear. “Then could you clear up some things for me?” He asked and I nodded staring at the hanging poster of the boys that was autographed and still framed on the paint splattered wall. “What was all that about down there?” Jordan asked taking my hand. I starred at our intertwined hands. Jordan had always been honest with me. Maybe Mrs. Jonas was right, it is better for him to know everything. I got nervous and knew it was now or never,
“Okay, well I used to have a really bad eating disorder, it really messed me up, bad attitude and all. It screwed up mine and Nick’s relationship as friends really bad.” I said quickly in one breath. He didn’t say anything so I just continued thinking he needed to hear more for proof. “One day I had been running with Joe on the beach and well I took it too far and I fainted. I was in the hospital for like a week.” I said and I felt my eyes stinging, I was getting upset and trying hard to fight the tears.
“What about the nightmare?” he inquired and I leaned my head back and starred at the ceiling like the answer was written up there for me to read. “I used to get really bad nightmares. I used to wake up screaming and crying and Nick used to be the one who could get me to calm down.” He nodded. “So uh yea.” I said awkwardly taking a shaky breath to calm my nerves and tear ducts. “Why didn’t you ever tell me?” He asked looking over at me for the first time. “You never asked.” I said and he laughed. “Well Al, we don’t exactly go around asking people about their eating disorders.” I laughed lightly; glad he wasn’t angry or upset with me. “Right” I said and he laughed as we lay down on the bed twin bed that had a hot pink blanket on it and a pillow that read Kelsey.
“Well since I have to be straight forward with you, you never robbed a bank right? No drugs?” He asked and I laughed. “No, none of that” I said and he kissed my head. “But if you must know” I started. “I must” He said in a voice making me laugh. “I used to be abused, by my mother’s boyfriend and an ex-boyfriend.” I said and I knew instantly the mood had changed from light and cheery to dreadful and sad. “Ally, that isn’t a funny joke.” He said filled with seriousness and sitting up. “It wasn’t meant to be.” I said sitting up next to him.
“Let me guess Al, Nick helped you through that to?” He asked angrily. “Um yea, once I finally let him.” I said confused as to where the anger was coming from. “God. I just can’t beat this guy.” He said standing up and starting to pace back and forth, never a good sign. “What do you mean?” I asked confused. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to hear him say that.
“Ally I don’t know if you realize this but ever since you got here, it’s been all about Nick Jonas. Now I didn’t mind it at first since you two were best friends and hadn’t seen each other in four years. But I mean come on!” He said throwing his hands in the air. “Sorry, I didn’t realize I was doing that.” I said ashamed. I really hadn't, but flashbacks were coming to my mind.
Jordan wanted to go to the mall, I’d call and see if Nick and Erin wanted to go, Jordan wanted to go to dinner it was the same deal. The only time I was actually alone with Jordan was at night when we were going to bed. This wasn’t fair to him and I hadn’t even noticed. “I just feel like I can’t measure up to everything you have Nick set up to be.” He said leaning against the wall, away from me.
“I don’t have him measured up to be anything, and you don’t need to compete with him at all!” I said standing up getting a little defensive. “And what if I said that was complete and utter bullshit what would you say!?” he said his voice getting loud. I took a step back, I had never heard him raise his voice to me like that, hell we never even really ever fought. “What?!” I asked upset. “Jesus Ally, It isn’t fair. For the five years we were together there was never any mention of him and now it’s like he’s a one man show and you have front row tickets!” Now I was getting mad. “I don’t like this jealous side of you Jordan. It’s really ugly and selfish. So maybe I’ve been excited to see him, I haven’t for four years and even when I did then, it was for a day!” I shouted and he laughed. “WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING!?” I shouted and he just laughed harder. “I think you just made up my mind.” And with that he walked out of the room. “Why the fuck does this always happen to me!?” I shouted and slammed the door shut.
Ten minutes later the door opened again. “Ally are you okay?” Nick asked softly. “This is all your freaking fault!!” I shouted and he just looked at me and then walked in and closed the door behind him. “Ally, I’m sorry.” He said and I laughed, “Of course you are! Because if you weren’t then you wouldn’t be the Nick Jonas everyone thinks I’m in love with!!” I shouted and he sat down right where he was against the door. “What happened?” He asked and I sighed, I spilled my guts, replaying word for word of what just happened. If anyone would understand it would be Nick, I mean we both heard the same thing from people ever since we were like eleven.
“Sorry Al, I know he means a lot to you but I have a question.” “What?” I asked. “I don’t understand why he would get so angry for me being there for you through your hardships, I mean I would be so thankful for the person who helped my girlfriend to still be here today.” He said staring at me. Nick was always good with the eye contact thing, it always made everything he had to say so much more sincere. “Nick please, don’t say that.” I whispered sitting on the floor leaning against the bed. “Why can’t I?” he asked pushing the subject, we both knew the answer though. “Because if I get a negative thought about Jordan in my mind, you know it will tear apart the relationship and it will be over faster than Joe’s 27 second phone call.” I said and half smiled.
“Well if you want my opinion-“ He started, “I don’t.” I tell him but he ignored me, “I had always heard great things about him from my brothers and even my mom, so I knew they had to be true, even perfect. But we all know no one is perfect, and I’m sorry, but if I was with someone who was always jealous of you and annoyed by our past I don’t think I could stay with them.” I rolled my eyes at him. I wasn’t going to break up with Jordan over this.
I laid down on the ground and he laid down so our heads were laying next to each other but our bodies in different directions. We laid there like that for a long time. The bedroom was dark before I spoke again. “I have a question.” I said. “Okay, shoot.” Nick said and I sighed. “Do you think there’s a reason God doesn’t want me to be happy? Like is there something I did to make him hate me? Like was I just a screw up he made or something?” I asked filled with seriousness, and Nick laughed. “Ally you are not screw up, and of course God wants you happy, it’s life that doesn’t. Life doesn’t want anyone to be happy.” He said. “What about Joe?” I asked. “What about him?” Nick asked confused.
“I remember the first time he kissed Nicole, in that family room when he found out they were going on a double date with me and well you know who. Then how upset he’d get when ever Nicole wasn’t around…their wedding day was the happiest I’d ever seen him. Well so I thought. My heart melts every time I see him look at Kara. Life seems to want him to be happy.” I said starting to cry. “Al-” Nick started, but I wouldn’t let him finish. “I just want to be that happy and find someone who loves me as much as Joe loves Nicole and Kara!” I said breaking down completely. A few moments passed until Nick was rocking me back and forth like a freaking baby and trying to sound reassuring. “Ally you’ll find someone I promise.” He said. “How are you so sure?!” I asked upset. “Because everyone gets a happy ending remember?” He asked and I heard Kevin’s voice the first time he ever told me that so many years ago. I laughed and wiped my tears away, embarrassed I had just had a break down.
“Please don’t tell anyone about this Nick” I said staring at him. He brought his thumb up to my cheek and brushed a tear away, “I promise.” He whispered and I smiled at him before hugging him. Nick was always the one saving me, but maybe it was time for Jordan to take that role. I wanted to believe that, I really did. But something in the very back of my head told me that it would always be Nick who would be the hero in my stories, even if I had a prince of my very own.
“Okay, well I used to have a really bad eating disorder, it really messed me up, bad attitude and all. It screwed up mine and Nick’s relationship as friends really bad.” I said quickly in one breath. He didn’t say anything so I just continued thinking he needed to hear more for proof. “One day I had been running with Joe on the beach and well I took it too far and I fainted. I was in the hospital for like a week.” I said and I felt my eyes stinging, I was getting upset and trying hard to fight the tears.
“What about the nightmare?” he inquired and I leaned my head back and starred at the ceiling like the answer was written up there for me to read. “I used to get really bad nightmares. I used to wake up screaming and crying and Nick used to be the one who could get me to calm down.” He nodded. “So uh yea.” I said awkwardly taking a shaky breath to calm my nerves and tear ducts. “Why didn’t you ever tell me?” He asked looking over at me for the first time. “You never asked.” I said and he laughed. “Well Al, we don’t exactly go around asking people about their eating disorders.” I laughed lightly; glad he wasn’t angry or upset with me. “Right” I said and he laughed as we lay down on the bed twin bed that had a hot pink blanket on it and a pillow that read Kelsey.
“Well since I have to be straight forward with you, you never robbed a bank right? No drugs?” He asked and I laughed. “No, none of that” I said and he kissed my head. “But if you must know” I started. “I must” He said in a voice making me laugh. “I used to be abused, by my mother’s boyfriend and an ex-boyfriend.” I said and I knew instantly the mood had changed from light and cheery to dreadful and sad. “Ally, that isn’t a funny joke.” He said filled with seriousness and sitting up. “It wasn’t meant to be.” I said sitting up next to him.
“Let me guess Al, Nick helped you through that to?” He asked angrily. “Um yea, once I finally let him.” I said confused as to where the anger was coming from. “God. I just can’t beat this guy.” He said standing up and starting to pace back and forth, never a good sign. “What do you mean?” I asked confused. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to hear him say that.
“Ally I don’t know if you realize this but ever since you got here, it’s been all about Nick Jonas. Now I didn’t mind it at first since you two were best friends and hadn’t seen each other in four years. But I mean come on!” He said throwing his hands in the air. “Sorry, I didn’t realize I was doing that.” I said ashamed. I really hadn't, but flashbacks were coming to my mind.
Jordan wanted to go to the mall, I’d call and see if Nick and Erin wanted to go, Jordan wanted to go to dinner it was the same deal. The only time I was actually alone with Jordan was at night when we were going to bed. This wasn’t fair to him and I hadn’t even noticed. “I just feel like I can’t measure up to everything you have Nick set up to be.” He said leaning against the wall, away from me.
“I don’t have him measured up to be anything, and you don’t need to compete with him at all!” I said standing up getting a little defensive. “And what if I said that was complete and utter bullshit what would you say!?” he said his voice getting loud. I took a step back, I had never heard him raise his voice to me like that, hell we never even really ever fought. “What?!” I asked upset. “Jesus Ally, It isn’t fair. For the five years we were together there was never any mention of him and now it’s like he’s a one man show and you have front row tickets!” Now I was getting mad. “I don’t like this jealous side of you Jordan. It’s really ugly and selfish. So maybe I’ve been excited to see him, I haven’t for four years and even when I did then, it was for a day!” I shouted and he laughed. “WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING!?” I shouted and he just laughed harder. “I think you just made up my mind.” And with that he walked out of the room. “Why the fuck does this always happen to me!?” I shouted and slammed the door shut.
Ten minutes later the door opened again. “Ally are you okay?” Nick asked softly. “This is all your freaking fault!!” I shouted and he just looked at me and then walked in and closed the door behind him. “Ally, I’m sorry.” He said and I laughed, “Of course you are! Because if you weren’t then you wouldn’t be the Nick Jonas everyone thinks I’m in love with!!” I shouted and he sat down right where he was against the door. “What happened?” He asked and I sighed, I spilled my guts, replaying word for word of what just happened. If anyone would understand it would be Nick, I mean we both heard the same thing from people ever since we were like eleven.
“Sorry Al, I know he means a lot to you but I have a question.” “What?” I asked. “I don’t understand why he would get so angry for me being there for you through your hardships, I mean I would be so thankful for the person who helped my girlfriend to still be here today.” He said staring at me. Nick was always good with the eye contact thing, it always made everything he had to say so much more sincere. “Nick please, don’t say that.” I whispered sitting on the floor leaning against the bed. “Why can’t I?” he asked pushing the subject, we both knew the answer though. “Because if I get a negative thought about Jordan in my mind, you know it will tear apart the relationship and it will be over faster than Joe’s 27 second phone call.” I said and half smiled.
“Well if you want my opinion-“ He started, “I don’t.” I tell him but he ignored me, “I had always heard great things about him from my brothers and even my mom, so I knew they had to be true, even perfect. But we all know no one is perfect, and I’m sorry, but if I was with someone who was always jealous of you and annoyed by our past I don’t think I could stay with them.” I rolled my eyes at him. I wasn’t going to break up with Jordan over this.
I laid down on the ground and he laid down so our heads were laying next to each other but our bodies in different directions. We laid there like that for a long time. The bedroom was dark before I spoke again. “I have a question.” I said. “Okay, shoot.” Nick said and I sighed. “Do you think there’s a reason God doesn’t want me to be happy? Like is there something I did to make him hate me? Like was I just a screw up he made or something?” I asked filled with seriousness, and Nick laughed. “Ally you are not screw up, and of course God wants you happy, it’s life that doesn’t. Life doesn’t want anyone to be happy.” He said. “What about Joe?” I asked. “What about him?” Nick asked confused.
“I remember the first time he kissed Nicole, in that family room when he found out they were going on a double date with me and well you know who. Then how upset he’d get when ever Nicole wasn’t around…their wedding day was the happiest I’d ever seen him. Well so I thought. My heart melts every time I see him look at Kara. Life seems to want him to be happy.” I said starting to cry. “Al-” Nick started, but I wouldn’t let him finish. “I just want to be that happy and find someone who loves me as much as Joe loves Nicole and Kara!” I said breaking down completely. A few moments passed until Nick was rocking me back and forth like a freaking baby and trying to sound reassuring. “Ally you’ll find someone I promise.” He said. “How are you so sure?!” I asked upset. “Because everyone gets a happy ending remember?” He asked and I heard Kevin’s voice the first time he ever told me that so many years ago. I laughed and wiped my tears away, embarrassed I had just had a break down.
“Please don’t tell anyone about this Nick” I said staring at him. He brought his thumb up to my cheek and brushed a tear away, “I promise.” He whispered and I smiled at him before hugging him. Nick was always the one saving me, but maybe it was time for Jordan to take that role. I wanted to believe that, I really did. But something in the very back of my head told me that it would always be Nick who would be the hero in my stories, even if I had a prince of my very own.