Love, Aspen

Matt and I had been lazing around all afternoon. We’d gotten up relatively early to make it to my interview and then he forced me to try and drive the car, then we just laid around on the couch and popped in movies all day. So far, we’d watched The Goonies, The Lost Boys, and he was just getting up to put it St. Elmo’s Fire when we heard the phone ringing. I jumped up off the couch and pranced over to the kitchen, grabbing the phone off the counter. I pressed the answer button and held it up to my ear.

“Hello?”

“Hey Aspen. It’s Aly, what’s up?”

“Nothing. Just watching movies with Matt.”

She laughed. “You guys are lame. It’s Saturday and you’re lazing about, watching movies?”

“We are not lame!” I argued. “Guess what?”

“What?”

“This lady right here. She got herself a job today.”

“Did you really?”

“Really really. I got a job at that movie store downtown.” I grinned over at Matt. “I am a working woman.”

“Well, you know what that means, don’t you?”

“Do I?” I laughed.

“It’s time for a little celebration. Why don’t you grab Matt and head on over to the house? We just bought a new bottle of Jack last night. We’ll take some shots and play some games or something.”

“Alright, sounds good.”

“See you in a few.”

I hung up the phone and looked over at Matt. “Get on your best dressed. We’re going partying.”

“What?” He asked, his face dropping.

“Aly just invited us over to have a celebration because I got a job.”

“I thought we were celebrating together.” He sighed. “Watching movies.”

“Do you really not want to go?” I asked him. “I can call her back. We don’t have to. I just thought that since she invited us, we could go hang out over there. It sounds like fun. And I’m pretty sure it’s only us four, we won’t have to deal with your friend Kelsey and her scary hairy vag.”

Matt rolled his eyes and laughed at me. “Shut up and put your shoes on.”

“Ooh, getting forceful now are we?” I grinned, walking over to him. “You know, just because you’re bigger and older doesn’t mean you can shove me around, Mr.”

He shoved his index finger and middle finger against my shoulder. “I can push you around all you want. You’re mine.”

I pretended to fall backwards and land on the floor. “Oh! You’ve killed me!”

“Get off the floor.” He laughed, holding out a hand to help me up.

I grabbed his hand and yanked him down with me, pulling him down on top of me. I put both my hands on either side of his face and kissed him on the mouth. “Seems to be that we’ve switched places.” I mused. “And once again, like always, you are fully clothed my friend.”

Matt looked down at me and laughed. “I told you, I don’t like taking my clothes off. The only time you’ll ever see me naked is…” He whispered. “Never.”

I kissed him softly on the cheek and then on the mouth. “Please.” I kissed him again. “I’m not going to make fun of you, Matt.” I laughed quietly. “I’m sure that your wiener, even though crooked is still beautiful.”

He gave me a weird look. “Have you ever seen a wiener, Aspen? They’re disgusting, even if they’re not crooked.”

I laughed. “I know Matt.” I kissed him again. “I’m just trying to get you naked.”

He pulled himself off of me and stood up, reaching out for my hand again. “Come on, let’s go. If it takes us too long to get there, they’re going to think that we were doing things we shouldn’t be doing.”

She shrugged. “Let’s just do it then and give them something to worry about.”

He shook his head at me. “Get up.”

I got up with a hint of my grin still on my face. Whether or not it took me all god damn night, I would get into Matt’s pants. I didn’t care if I had to get him belligerently drunk. I was going to do it. I was going to do him. I took his hand in mine and followed him out the door to the Mazda. He turned around and looked at me, smiling.

“Wanna drive?”

“Are you fucking crazy? No.” I laughed. “I don’t know how to drive that damn thing. I am not taking it on the road where innocent people are just trying to get places. I’ll probably fucking kill someone, Matt.”

He laughed and shook his head, swinging the keys around his finger. “Suit yourself.”

We climbed into the car and he started it with ease. I watched over at him as he quickly let the clutch in and pushed on the gas, doing it so fast that I almost was jealous. He shifted the car into reverse and pulled out into the road, shifting back into first and then pulled out into traffic, getting it into second gear and eventually third as we made our way to Craig and Aly’s house.

“So when are you going grow some balls and drive this thing on the road?”

I looked over at him with a stupid smile on my face and shrugged. “I dunno.”

He shook his head at me for what seemed like the thousandth time today. “Well you need to figure it out, Miss Aspen. Because if not, you’re going to be eighteen and not even know how to drive a car.” He scoffed. “Wouldn’t that be embarrassing?”

“Oh fuck you.”

He raised his eyebrows at me again. “You better quit challenging me.”

I laughed, mocking him. “Oh hey, Matt, when are you going to grow some balls and actually take me up on that offer?”

He went quiet; a smile slapped on his little boy face. “That was a low blow.”

I shrugged. “I’m just curious. I might have to take some of my paycheck and buy myself a toy because you.” I said, stretching my legs out on the dashboard. “You just aren’t doing the job.”

He glanced over at me as he got into the left turning lane. “You sure are pushy, you know that?”

“Give me a break, I was in jail for six months!”

He gave me another look, pulling into Craig and Aly’s driveway. “And five of it you spent messing around with that girl.”

I nodded. “This is true. But there is a big difference between a girl like Cassie and someone like you. Someone with a crooked wiener.”

He laughed. “Whatever.”

I grabbed his forearm. “I’m serious though. Cassie and I just used each other to get off. It wasn’t like we loved each other or anything. It was just a lot of lust, and she was really pushy with me.” I laughed quietly. “I’ll stop shoving you into it, but I feel like it’s different between us. I really do love you, and that’s the big difference. If you want me to be honest, I’ve never had sex with someone who I love and who loves me back. So forgive me for wanting to know what that’s like.”

The tone in the car had gotten serious. He looked at me and smiled softly. “Aspen, it’s not that I don’t want to have sex with you. I just don’t want you rushing into something with me and then changing your mind. I love you too. If you want me to be honest, I’ve had sex with two people. Just like you. And one of them was Courtney and the other one was some girl that I lost my virginity to freshman year at some party. Courtney and I used to love each other at one point, but after a while, we just stopped having sex. She never seemed interested in it. And she told me that I grossed her out. My body was gross and it just makes me really self conscious—“

I tried to cut him off. “Matt—“

He cut me off just as quick. “And I know that you don’t think like that at all. But you know what I’m saying. You hear that enough and you start to believe it yourself and it just makes things hard.”

I nodded. “What if I just tell you that you have a six pack every day? Will that make you believe it?”

He smiled and kissed me on the cheek. “Maybe.”

We both piled out of the car and walked up to Craig and Aly’s door, knocking lightly. We all sat around the table with a deck of cards and played a couple of drinking games. Craig and Aly ended up getting drunk pretty quick and they put on a movie and vegged out, passing out on the couch. Matt and I stayed up, taking a few more shots. Both of us were pretty buzzed, a little past drunk but not plastered. He dragged me into the spare room that I’d slept in that night with Andy and we crawled into bed together.

I kissed him on the mouth, tasting the alcohol on his lips. He kissed me back and slipped his tongue into my mouth, fingering the hem of my shirt. I pulled away and moved over so that I was straddling him and pulled off my shirt, reaching down and grabbing the hem to his. But, he was quick and grabbed it. I laughed at him.

“Matt. It’s so fucking dark in here.” I slurred. “Just let me take your shirt off. Please?”

Reluctantly, he let me pull it up over his head and I ran kisses down his chest and stopped at his belt line, unbuckling his pants. I felt him tense up again. “Aspen.”

“What?”

“I don’t think we should do this while—“

“We’re drunk?” I asked, laughing. “I don’t think you’re drunk enough or else you would just shut up and let me take care of this. Now be fucking quiet or else you’re going to wake up Craig and Aly.”

I slid his pants off his legs with his help and ran kisses back up his stomach, kissing him roughly on the mouth and letting my hand wander between his legs. I could sense his nervousness as he tried to kiss me back, becoming tense underneath me.

I breathed against his neck. “Matt, just calm down. I’m not going to do anything to hurt you.”

“I’m not worried about that.”

“Yes you are. You’re worried I’m going to make fun of you or do something that will embarrass you. And I’m not going to. Just calm down a little bit, alright?”

I moved back down and removed his underwear, replacing my hands with my mouth and listened as he tried to hold in his deep breaths. I moved back up and kissed him on the mouth again. He placed both hands on my rib cage and pushed me over so that he was on top of me now. I unhooked my bra and he yanked my pants off, pressing his naked body against mine. I could feel his breath against my neck, I could taste the alcohol on his breath. His lips grazed my cheek so softly; I almost didn’t know that they were there.

He put a shaky hand on either side of me and pushed himself inside. I gasped slightly at first, but let him continue. His hands moved closer to my body and pressed against my already hot skin. With every soft thrust, I got progressively louder.

He laughed at me, placing his mouth over mine and kissing me. He was breathing hard. “You need to be quiet, Aspen.”

I placed my hand on his chest and looked up at him. “Why is your heart beating so fast?”

“I’m nervous.”

“Why?

I felt him shrug. “I don’t think I know what I’m doing. It’s been a while.”

I pulled his head against my chest and rested my hand on the back of his neck. “Do you need some positive reinforcement?” I asked, moaning as he thrusted softly again. “Because you’re doing.” I moaned again. “Doing just perfect.”